The Worst Five of 2007
This year, I'm going to get this done. Last year, I worked on getting my Top 20 FIlms and Worst 5 I saw last year, and went through a creative breakdown as I was recapping them, only publishing the Worst 5. So this year, I will start off with the Worst 5 of this year, then do a quick post on my Top 20 of last year (I actually finished half of it, the other half I will "bare-bones" the rest, not that they weren't deserving, but just in the management of time.
Anyway, here's the stinkers this year:
5) Smokin' Aces
I seemed to steer clear of a lot of stinkers this year, but this one kind of stuck out for me because it had such strong promise for fun. It's well shot, well acted, with a lot of fun turns. But in the end it left me thinking "what's the point"? Lots of people to not root for, and the few that are sympathetic either aren't well drawn, or get whacked too early. More of a disapoointment than an out and out stinker.
4) Spider Man 3
Bloated. Bad acting. Bad storytelling. Bad, bad, BAD lip-syncing (C'mon Kirsten...you couldn't fix this in post?) Too many villains. Not enough substance. An out and out disappointment, especially given how good the first two chapters were. It's time for a reboot. And while we're at it, can we put Jake Gyllenhall in the title role, and ditch Kirsten Dunst? It's not on the level of bad like nipple-suitedBatman and Robin, as it is watchable, but it's not something I would watch again soon.
3) Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Speaking of bloated sequels, can we let this one have a rest? Despite some truly amazing effects, and a wonderful hallucinatory sequence involving Johnny Depp, Johnny Depp, and 50 other Johnny Depps (not to mention a ton of cool crabs), the movie is just one action sequence after another, with very little storytelling involved. It's way too long, and too unsatisfying of a payoff. But with any luck, at the very least it will be the last one.
2) Because I Said So
Wow. I was on Vicodin for this one, sitting at home with nothing on, and it was still painful, with a wasted cast, Diane Keaton at her most annoying, and a family I could care less about. It tried to be cute and likeable, and I honestly can't remember one thing about this movie I liked or even laughed at. This is the reason why romantic comedies get a bad name. Terrible.
1) Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer
Wow. As a comic book fan, I should have known better given the first (mostly crappy) film. But strangely enough, I was intrigued by the trailer. And despite a couple of humorous moments (mainly supplied by Chris Evans, who nails the Human Torch, and is still is the highlight of both movies), and a very cool Silver Surfer, the movie is just B-A-D, bolstered somewhat by some excellent special effects. But even they can't hide the horrible ending, wooden acting (can someone please shut Jessica Alba up?)...even the normally dependable Andre Braugher comes off as second-rate given the crappy dialogue he has. Let's put a stake in this franchise before it kills all the goodwill I have towards seeing superhero movies. (Fingers still crossed for Iron Man.)
(Apologies about the images...not sure why they aren't pulling up, but I will fix this ASAP.)
Anyway, here's the stinkers this year:
5) Smokin' Aces
I seemed to steer clear of a lot of stinkers this year, but this one kind of stuck out for me because it had such strong promise for fun. It's well shot, well acted, with a lot of fun turns. But in the end it left me thinking "what's the point"? Lots of people to not root for, and the few that are sympathetic either aren't well drawn, or get whacked too early. More of a disapoointment than an out and out stinker.
4) Spider Man 3
Bloated. Bad acting. Bad storytelling. Bad, bad, BAD lip-syncing (C'mon Kirsten...you couldn't fix this in post?) Too many villains. Not enough substance. An out and out disappointment, especially given how good the first two chapters were. It's time for a reboot. And while we're at it, can we put Jake Gyllenhall in the title role, and ditch Kirsten Dunst? It's not on the level of bad like nipple-suitedBatman and Robin, as it is watchable, but it's not something I would watch again soon.
3) Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Speaking of bloated sequels, can we let this one have a rest? Despite some truly amazing effects, and a wonderful hallucinatory sequence involving Johnny Depp, Johnny Depp, and 50 other Johnny Depps (not to mention a ton of cool crabs), the movie is just one action sequence after another, with very little storytelling involved. It's way too long, and too unsatisfying of a payoff. But with any luck, at the very least it will be the last one.
2) Because I Said So
Wow. I was on Vicodin for this one, sitting at home with nothing on, and it was still painful, with a wasted cast, Diane Keaton at her most annoying, and a family I could care less about. It tried to be cute and likeable, and I honestly can't remember one thing about this movie I liked or even laughed at. This is the reason why romantic comedies get a bad name. Terrible.
1) Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer
Wow. As a comic book fan, I should have known better given the first (mostly crappy) film. But strangely enough, I was intrigued by the trailer. And despite a couple of humorous moments (mainly supplied by Chris Evans, who nails the Human Torch, and is still is the highlight of both movies), and a very cool Silver Surfer, the movie is just B-A-D, bolstered somewhat by some excellent special effects. But even they can't hide the horrible ending, wooden acting (can someone please shut Jessica Alba up?)...even the normally dependable Andre Braugher comes off as second-rate given the crappy dialogue he has. Let's put a stake in this franchise before it kills all the goodwill I have towards seeing superhero movies. (Fingers still crossed for Iron Man.)
(Apologies about the images...not sure why they aren't pulling up, but I will fix this ASAP.)