High Schools OVER!!
Yes, Thank god those words run through my head as if it was the end of a painful thing. Well the truth be knowen it was. Monday i graduated from the one thing that caused me the most pain in my life. The thing called HIGH SCHOOL!.. Now its a new start. I brought to my graduation my family and the TWO best friends that i have right now and that have stuck by me. Jeff and Leen. They have stuck by me through so much this year and helped me in the times of need and i wanted to thank them. They do mean the world to me.Specaily after this year.
I went up to school on the last day and walked inside to say my finnal goodbyes to a few people and walked around having the memories of my Ex Bf. Steven D. Rehberg go through my mind and thats when i have decied to just let it go and move on, Since the memories wont be with me everyday, and the flashes wont go through my head as much of the Fun times and the bad, i will never forget my high school years... From my friends to the people who i hated or wanted to kill me, it acculy made high school fun. Because i made it out through all the drama and the times i had become P.G. Yes me the one who thought she would be with her high school sweetheart did make it through with out him.
As i sit and say This is the START OF THE NEW ME!!!
Highschools over, friends will part and times will get different, with people leaving the state and others staying here to do what they want to.. I will be a different person...
I took the car to school to show it off and finnaly people believe that i did get one of my dreams, my CAR, the one thing that i know that will stay loyal to me. Steve did come up there and he was having a bad day, so him and i got into it and went our seperate ways. As i drove away i thought to myself, that this is it... I will lose him and lose the feelings of him and try to put him in the back of my mind to forget him. As much as i say that i want to forget him i know deep down i never will. But i proved to him that i am stronger then what i thought i was, and i can do what i need to do with or without him.
................................................................
Heres a break in something that i wanted to post in here a while ago... It acculy happened Friday June 9th, 2006
It was 2:30am I hear my phone go off and a banging on my window. Just as i see my ex Steven Rehberg. Trying to get up and get dressed a few things flash through my mind and i get worried what it could be about this time.As i get out there i see that he was with Shae and they were both drunk but shae was the worst. Steve comes and gives me a hug and tells me that hes happy that i was graduating and that he hopes for the best when i do get out of here.
Well that lead into Hugging and holding on to him so then he didnt fall, and the whole time things where running through my head to make me see that i wa truly happy with him. But i knew he was with someone else and thats just hoe it is right noe.
We ended up sitting down because Shae was getting sick and steve and i started to talk about things from the past and thats when he was like:: IM SO SORRY FOR EVER HURTTING YOU. AND THAT I NEVER MEANT TO!!!! Well i couldnt look at him at all and if i did i started to cry. He said that he was ready to have a family and get married. I mean the last time him and i did something was when he deiced to cum in me and he wanted me to become p.g. He thought that it would solve his problems in his head and be happy together then.But i guess it still hurts him and he does wanna try it again sometime.......... But i thought it was kinda funny when he wanted me to look at him when he knew i was crying. I mean he held my hand and held onto me. Which i thought nothing of. Until he leaned over and started to kiss me because he knew that was a comfert thing. I thought that maybe with him just randomly seeing me late as night that maybe he was thinking about something and that i finally clicked in his head that maybe i do love him and need him.
The truth is he wants me to go and finsish my dream because he knew that i would be better off with out him since he wasnt going to graduate on time and all that fun stuff. I told him that he could come with me anyhow, i really wanted him to, and he said no... He said that he still wants to open the dream shop together and that we would be a kick ass team but hes afried that with the fights and everything we have has that it would ruin the busniness.. *shrugs*
The words that do ring in my head are what he said when he said goodbye to me::: "YOU WILL COME BACK TO MINNESOTA, YOU'LL BE BACK TO LOOK FOR ME. AND I HOPE ITS NOT TO LATE WHEN WE GET BACK TOGETHER,BECAUSE I DONT WANNA HEAR OUTTA YOUR MOUTH THAT YOU LEFT EARLY WHEN I ASK YOU BACK OUT."
^^^ with that said i walked into the house and shut the door sat down and thought.. he didnt think of himself and acculy made since.. it didnt seem him, but i asked him later if he meant it and he did....... Well time is going to play.....
................................................................
With that all said i thought i would lose my mind over the next few days but i really havent, i have been keeping my head high and doing things that i need to get done, Yes breaking down and crying was in there but theres a number of reasons for that...
PARTY IS JUNE 17th 8am to when i KICK U OUT!!!!
Im off to bed, my minds running.. Ill up-date in a while.. like when im done with that party :)
I went up to school on the last day and walked inside to say my finnal goodbyes to a few people and walked around having the memories of my Ex Bf. Steven D. Rehberg go through my mind and thats when i have decied to just let it go and move on, Since the memories wont be with me everyday, and the flashes wont go through my head as much of the Fun times and the bad, i will never forget my high school years... From my friends to the people who i hated or wanted to kill me, it acculy made high school fun. Because i made it out through all the drama and the times i had become P.G. Yes me the one who thought she would be with her high school sweetheart did make it through with out him.
As i sit and say This is the START OF THE NEW ME!!!
Highschools over, friends will part and times will get different, with people leaving the state and others staying here to do what they want to.. I will be a different person...
I took the car to school to show it off and finnaly people believe that i did get one of my dreams, my CAR, the one thing that i know that will stay loyal to me. Steve did come up there and he was having a bad day, so him and i got into it and went our seperate ways. As i drove away i thought to myself, that this is it... I will lose him and lose the feelings of him and try to put him in the back of my mind to forget him. As much as i say that i want to forget him i know deep down i never will. But i proved to him that i am stronger then what i thought i was, and i can do what i need to do with or without him.
................................................................
Heres a break in something that i wanted to post in here a while ago... It acculy happened Friday June 9th, 2006
It was 2:30am I hear my phone go off and a banging on my window. Just as i see my ex Steven Rehberg. Trying to get up and get dressed a few things flash through my mind and i get worried what it could be about this time.As i get out there i see that he was with Shae and they were both drunk but shae was the worst. Steve comes and gives me a hug and tells me that hes happy that i was graduating and that he hopes for the best when i do get out of here.
Well that lead into Hugging and holding on to him so then he didnt fall, and the whole time things where running through my head to make me see that i wa truly happy with him. But i knew he was with someone else and thats just hoe it is right noe.
We ended up sitting down because Shae was getting sick and steve and i started to talk about things from the past and thats when he was like:: IM SO SORRY FOR EVER HURTTING YOU. AND THAT I NEVER MEANT TO!!!! Well i couldnt look at him at all and if i did i started to cry. He said that he was ready to have a family and get married. I mean the last time him and i did something was when he deiced to cum in me and he wanted me to become p.g. He thought that it would solve his problems in his head and be happy together then.But i guess it still hurts him and he does wanna try it again sometime.......... But i thought it was kinda funny when he wanted me to look at him when he knew i was crying. I mean he held my hand and held onto me. Which i thought nothing of. Until he leaned over and started to kiss me because he knew that was a comfert thing. I thought that maybe with him just randomly seeing me late as night that maybe he was thinking about something and that i finally clicked in his head that maybe i do love him and need him.
The truth is he wants me to go and finsish my dream because he knew that i would be better off with out him since he wasnt going to graduate on time and all that fun stuff. I told him that he could come with me anyhow, i really wanted him to, and he said no... He said that he still wants to open the dream shop together and that we would be a kick ass team but hes afried that with the fights and everything we have has that it would ruin the busniness.. *shrugs*
The words that do ring in my head are what he said when he said goodbye to me::: "YOU WILL COME BACK TO MINNESOTA, YOU'LL BE BACK TO LOOK FOR ME. AND I HOPE ITS NOT TO LATE WHEN WE GET BACK TOGETHER,BECAUSE I DONT WANNA HEAR OUTTA YOUR MOUTH THAT YOU LEFT EARLY WHEN I ASK YOU BACK OUT."
^^^ with that said i walked into the house and shut the door sat down and thought.. he didnt think of himself and acculy made since.. it didnt seem him, but i asked him later if he meant it and he did....... Well time is going to play.....
................................................................
With that all said i thought i would lose my mind over the next few days but i really havent, i have been keeping my head high and doing things that i need to get done, Yes breaking down and crying was in there but theres a number of reasons for that...
PARTY IS JUNE 17th 8am to when i KICK U OUT!!!!
Im off to bed, my minds running.. Ill up-date in a while.. like when im done with that party :)