updating
i'm doing better today. i;ve come a way, a long way rather quickly. which i;m shocked about but its shown me something. Dans is a stronger the woman than me or anyone else has been led to believe.
what have i learnt?
i don;t need sam in my life. i dont need him to be happy, to be whiole. hell i dont need anyone. i don't need thier approval or acceptance. but on learning that ive realised something else. i want sam in my life. not in exactly the capacity he was. i dont want the realtionship to be like that. but i want him as a friend and lover. and i can have him and thats fustrating
knowing its fustrating me reminds me i still have a long way to go. in my fuastreation i;m snapping at the people near me. its not thier fault, i need to control my anger and fustration.
enough of the reflection stuff what else has been going on?
Got to spend some time with the kids, reading with acacia was fun. Got some clothes and trainers and horseriding stuff so need to book some lessons once they arrive.
Am studying for my theory test hopefully take it soon thougfh i need to do the hazard perception stuffs.
today i am heading to vanessas, i always like going by her.
i've had andy asking if he can get back in my life again. I had to tell him no, i can't lead him on, i don;t want to be that kind of person.
well breakfast is waiting and then vanessas so better go.
Dans
ps i'm sleeping and eating well again, have removed the pillow from the right habd side of the bed :-)
what have i learnt?
i don;t need sam in my life. i dont need him to be happy, to be whiole. hell i dont need anyone. i don't need thier approval or acceptance. but on learning that ive realised something else. i want sam in my life. not in exactly the capacity he was. i dont want the realtionship to be like that. but i want him as a friend and lover. and i can have him and thats fustrating
knowing its fustrating me reminds me i still have a long way to go. in my fuastreation i;m snapping at the people near me. its not thier fault, i need to control my anger and fustration.
enough of the reflection stuff what else has been going on?
Got to spend some time with the kids, reading with acacia was fun. Got some clothes and trainers and horseriding stuff so need to book some lessons once they arrive.
Am studying for my theory test hopefully take it soon thougfh i need to do the hazard perception stuffs.
today i am heading to vanessas, i always like going by her.
i've had andy asking if he can get back in my life again. I had to tell him no, i can't lead him on, i don;t want to be that kind of person.
well breakfast is waiting and then vanessas so better go.
Dans
ps i'm sleeping and eating well again, have removed the pillow from the right habd side of the bed :-)