Have You Ever Been Alone In A Crowded Room

[benjamincurley]

Man my life is just way too busy. The only time I get to relax all day is after 10 when my family goes to sleep. Any moment of piece I should have is ruined by their very presence. You all are so luck to have families that you get along with. I think I have made a life changing decition, and that is a big deal since I am the most indecisive person on the planet. I think if I don't make it as an actor, and who are we kidding that is a billion to one chance, I think I want to be a police officer. Try to make a possitive diffrence in the world and serve the people. I'm not talking about a little town cop like in Tecumseh where my job is chasing teenagers who commit rolling stops, I'm taking big city. Maybe Boston, or Santa Fe. I don't know maybe this is just an excuse to get a rush. Finally feel like I can do something that really matters. I just really want to do anything where my life will really matter and I will know that I have done something that will forever do some good. We all make our mark on this earth, but some make bigger marks than others. Some people think that if they become famous then they will be immortal (in a proverbial sense), but in a hundred years no on will remember Matt Damon. No we remember the Cesars, the Jesus Christs, the Buddahs, and the Alexanders. I know I will never be someone like that but I am setting my sights a little higher than most people. My biggest fear is to be forgotten, and I want to do something that will stand out in the pages of history. I have this erg in my soul to try and fix this world that appears to me to be F.U.B.A.R. I don't want to be president or a King I just want to look back when I die and say "I did all that." Maybe I'm crazy but I think there are some things worth saving, every few hundred years someone stands up when no one else will. I think in our life time everything is going to break down again, and I plan to be ready to try and shape something good out of it. Wow, that was a weird rant.
Till next time,
Benjamin D. Curley