Say You're Mine (J2, NC-17) 3/7
So, from then on, it’s just friends.
Jared isn’t really sure how to be just friends with Jensen (or if that’s even going to work, to be honest) but he takes a shot at it and invites Jensen out for drinks with Mike, Allie and Adrianne.
It’s weird at first, trying to find a balance between paying too much or not enough attention to each other (because if you go with the less is more theory you risk looking like a douche who’s awkwardly avoiding the other person, and if you go too far the other way, you end up with creepy, desperate staring), but alcohol helps, as it always does, and by the end of the night Jared’s drunk enough to actually talk to Jensen in a semi-normal way, and he starts thinking this friends thing might be okay. You know, occasionally or whatever. Every once in a while.
Which is, of course, when Jensen lets it slip that he interviewed someone who does wedding cakes for an article once, and roughly two seconds after he pulls up the girl’s website on his phone, Allie and Adrianne are squealing over the pictures with girly glee and insisting they have to have one. And when it turns out Jensen knows this Victoria chick well enough to swing them a discount, there are very nearly declarations of undying love. And just like that, without any say from Jared at all, Jensen is suddenly inextricably involved in the wedding planning.
Which is fine. If Allie and Adrianne are going to drag Jared on a tour of every possible wedding location in New York, he’d much rather have Jensen along with him than Mike.
And spending time with Jensen is good, too. They’ve already proven with several dates that they get along pretty well, and hanging out - whether at the bar, at department stores full of potential wedding gifts or at someone’s apartment - is almost the same thing. It even gets comfortable enough that the two of them hang out alone a few times.
It doesn’t stop Jared from wanting Jensen, of course. He’s pretty sure that whoever said that crap about absence making the heart grow fonder never tried being friends with someone they had unrequited feelings for, because no matter how much time Jared spends with Jensen, he never ends up liking him an iota less. Exactly the opposite, in fact - it seems like every time he discovers a new habit or quirk or hobby of Jensen’s he likes him even more. And those things that he already knew and liked about Jensen? Those just get stronger. It’s hard to be around Jensen, sometimes.
Because when he makes Jensen laugh about something stupid - a real laugh, not a polite, fake chuckle - warmth spreads through Jared’s chest. When Jensen grins at him, there’s no way Jared can keep an answering smile off his face. When Jensen absent-mindedly says something like, “Oh, thanks, you’re amazing,” Jared can’t help the pleased rush he gets. And when Jensen touches his arm or leans into him or falls asleep on his couch after a movie, it’s hard not to just reach out and touch him, to show him just how much Jared wants.
But he doesn’t. He keeps his hands and his feelings and his desires strictly to himself, because that’s what a friend does. If this is the only way he can have Jensen, then he’s taking it.
And if Jensen happens to mention that the website where he publishes his writing is getting a criminally low amount of hits and Jared maybe happens to send a link in an email to his entire school promising donuts at the next faculty meeting if everyone forwards it to their family and friends, well. That’s just being a good friend. The shocked-but-happy look on Jensen’s face when he tells them about a compliment from his boss on the increased traffic is more than worth it, even if Jared did have to tell people it was a site offering free DVDs instead of fluff journalism.
It’s still not easy, though. Being Jensen’s friend sometimes means stepping in as his wingman, if Mike is busy or incapacitated or making one of his lame attempts to use a Halloween costume as an undercover disguise (seriously, how is it fair that the universe rewards Mike with sex for throwing on a jumpsuit and pirating a backstory from Top Gun?), and watching Jensen flirt with another guy is about as much fun as a trip to the dentist. Watching Jensen go home with another guy is like getting a root canal without anesthesia.
It’s especially hard when Jensen starts dating Ben, who’s movie-star gorgeous and oil-tycoon-rich, but the intellectual equivalent of a baked potato. Or at least that’s what Jared assumes, because the one time they hang out, when Ben scores them an invite to some exclusive party, he spends the entire night glued to his iPhone, texting and talking and basically ignoring his extremely hot date. Jared spends the entire night wanting to punch him in the face.
But Jensen wasn’t kidding about not wanting something serious, and when Jared catches a killer strain of pneumonia from one of his students and has to spend two days in the hospital after the holidays, Jensen almost never leaves his side. He sneaks Jared food he’s not supposed to have, mocks daytime talkshows with him, and doesn’t make fun when Jared actually gets a little caught up in an improbable paralysis storyline on As the World Turns. His phone rings a few times, and Jared catches Ben’s name on the screen, but Jensen just shoves it in his pocket. By the time Jared’s out of the hospital, Jensen and Ben are over.
And that’s really the reason Jared ends up being okay with this whole friends thing - because it may have broken his stupid heart just a little when Jensen didn’t want something serious with him, but now that Jensen’s dating other guys, it doesn’t bother Jared very much. Jensen goes out with other guys, Jensen sleeps with other guys, and Jensen breaks up with other guys. Jared doesn’t get to date Jensen or have sex with Jensen, but he doesn’t get dumped. No matter what Jensen’s love life is like, he’s always Jared’s friend. The other guys come and go, but Jared keeps his place in Jensen’s life.
And maybe that’s a little bit pathetic, to be happy with that little piece of Jensen, but he can’t bring himself to regret it.
And maybe karma’s working for him or his luck is finally turning around, because it’s his friendship with Jensen that’s responsible for Jared meeting the second-most perfect guy he’s ever laid eyes on: Michael.
*
“I don’t know, I kind of like the pink one,” Adrianne says, tilting her head. “The gold swirls are really pretty.”
“But the green one has the little rosebuds,” Allie points out. “It’s totally adorable.”
“But that shade of green is a little weird. The blue one might work, actually.”
“It’s a little rounder than the others, but it is nice.”
“It’s subtle, but it’s classy.”
“Exactly,” Allie nods.
“Ladies,” Jared says. “Not to be nitpicking, but you seem to have missed a vital step in the cake-choosing process.”
Mike raises an eyebrow. “Which would be…?”
“What the cake tastes like,” Jared says, exasperated. “You’ve spent half an hour debating what it looks like, but you haven’t even talked about what kind of cake it’s going to be!” He waves a hand. “Lemon? Raspberry? Almond? Vanilla? This is a serious issue!”
Allie can’t help herself - one look at Adrianne and she bursts out laughing. “Oh, Jared, sweetheart,” she says, shaking her head. “You’re so naïve.”
“Because I think the cake should look good and taste good?”
“No, because you’ve lived with us for eight years and you think we actually have to discuss what kind of cake it’s going to be,” Adrianne says.
“Chocolate,” Allie tells him when he still looks confused. “With a layer of chocolate filling.”
Jared’s grin spreads across his whole face. “I knew there was a reason I liked you girls.”
“Dude,” Mike says. “If I knew you were this easy, I’d have been bribing you with baked goods a long time ago.”
Adrianne raises her eyebrows. “How did you think we con Jared into doing all the dirty chores?”
Mike grins and opens his mouth, but before he can say anything that Allie will have to smack him for, Jensen throws himself down across the booth from her and says, “Fuck, I am so totally screwed. Worst day ever.”
“I don’t know,” Mike says, looking him up and down. “You’ve still got all your clothes and I don’t see any embarrassing tattoos. You’re still miles away from my worst day.”
“Which is a good thing,” Adrianne points out. “Besides,” she says with a grin, “Just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they’re not there.”
“Ooh, do you have a naughty unicorn tattoo?” Allie asks, shoving her list of wedding to-do’s out of the way. Fairytale animals inked on Jensen’s ass are way more exciting than the logistics of wedding invitations.
“No, no, I got it,” Jared declares, waving his hands for quiet. “Two unicorns.” He grins slyly. “Two, big, muscular stallions crossing horns.”
Jensen shakes his head as all four of them crack up. “Jesus, you guys. No, no one held me down and forcibly tattooed me. This was more of a case of really bad timing on my boss’s part.” He sighs. “And a really unfortunate choice on my part not to suck it up and tell the truth.”
“Which is what?” Adrianne asks. “C’mon, cut the theatrics and tell us what happened.”
“My boss’s boss invited me to watch a Rangers game in his suite tomorrow night.”
There’s a moment of silence after that announcement, which was really not what Allie was expecting. Quite frankly, she likes the sexin’ ass unicorns better.
“Wow,” Mike says dryly. “What’s next, is this asshole going to force a fancy car on you? I don’t know how you stand such horrible working conditions.”
“Shut up, I’m not done,” Jensen says, elbowing Mike. “He only invited me because I told him my boyfriend is a huge hockey fan.”
Adrianne frowns. “What boyfriend?”
“Ben.”
“Okay, hang on, I’m confused,” Jared interrupts. “Ben’s not your boyfriend. Or, at least, not anymore.”
“I know,” Jensen says, rubbing his temples. “But this guy - my boss’s boss - he almost never bothers talking to the little people. So when
he was a little drunk and friendly at the office holiday party, I told him my boyfriend was really into hockey. So he’d notice me.”
“But then you and Ben broke up.”
Jensen groans. “I know. But he doesn’t know that. And when he invited me to the game, I was way too psyched that he even knew who I was to think about it. And so I kind of forgot to tell him that the hockey-loving boyfriend is now a hockey-loving ex-boyfriend. Who no longer acknowledges my existence or answers my phone calls.”
“So tell him you can’t go,” Adrianne points out sensibly. “Whoops, you forgot you had to take your parents out for their anniversary. Problem solved.”
“But I have to go. Not just for the hockey,” he amends hastily at her look. “This guy could totally make or break my career. He’s the one who’s going to decide who replaces my editor when the guy retires next year. If I can make a good impression, I’ll have an edge on a promotion.” He grimaces. “And seriously, after today’s human interest story on geriatric snakes, I could really use some better assignments.”
Mike snorts. “Technically, that’d be a reptilian interest story.” He tilts his head. “Is there snake porn?”
“Wow,” Jared says. “It literally took you less than two seconds to go there.”
“Hey, it’s a talent.”
“It’s disturbing, is what it is.”
“Can we get back to my problems, please?” Jensen asks plaintively.
Allie reaches across the table to pat his arm reassuringly. “Of course, Jensen. So, what it comes down to is that you need to go to this thing. And somehow you need to magically find a hockey-loving boyfriend to go with you.”
“Pretty much,” Jensen agrees morosely.
“Well, the boyfriend part kind of counts out me and Adrianne,” Allie admits. “But maybe we can find you someone to pretend to be Ben.”
“Mike likes hockey,” Adrianne points out.
“But not men,” Mike points out.
At her dirty look, he shrugs. “Hey, I’d totally go if all you needed was someone to eat the food and watch the game. But schmoozing with the boss and making googly eyes and holding your hand? I don’t even do that stuff with women. It’s a little out of my comfort zone.”
Jensen shrugs. “Fair enough.”
“Okay,” Allie says, determined to find a solution to this problem. “So maybe if we just find a way to temporarily brainwash Ben into - “
“I’ll do it.”
A long moment of silence follows Jared’s announcement. He raises his eyebrows as he looks around the table. “What? I like hockey. I like Jensen. I’m not afraid to hold his hand and say mushy stuff about our big gay love.” He shrugs. “I think it’d work.”
And that’s just it, because it wouldn’t, not really. Allie knows that with just as much certainty as she knows that Adrianne loves her. Jared’s trying to do a good thing here, following that giant heart of his, but no matter how comfortable he and Jensen have gotten over the past few months, no matter what Jared might think or say, he’s not over Jensen. And this? This has the potential to bring all that buried hurt to the surface and fuck everything up.
Thankfully, Allie doesn’t even have to send Adrianne a worried look - before she can even react, Adrianne says, “But Jared, what about the thing?”
Jared blinks. “Thing?”
“Yeah,” Adrianne says. “You know. That thing with the…meatloaf. Tomorrow.”
Allie wrinkles her nose. Meatloaf?
Oh, shut up, says the look Adrianne levels her. I’m on the spot and you’re not helping.
That’s because meatloaf is gross, Allie says with a roll of her eyes. But when Jared looks quizzically at her, she nods and says, “That’s right. Jared, you promised to cook your mom’s famous meatloaf for dinner tomorrow, remember? To thank us for being such awesome friends.”
She smiles sweetly.
All three of the men look baffled by this turn of the conversation, but Jared’s quick to catch on. “That’s okay,” he says, waving a hand. “It’s not a big deal. We’ll do it some other time.”
“But you’ve been planning it for - “
“Really,” Jared says firmly, glaring a little. “I appreciate the enthusiasm, but it’s fine. Really.”
“Jared, I can’t ask you to do that,” Jensen says reluctantly.
“Do what?” Jared asks. “Spend a few hours with you - which I do already - and watch a hockey game. Which I also do already.”
“Yeah, but - “
“All you’re asking me for is a favor,” Jared says. “And friends ask each other for favors all the time. I’m pretty sure that’s a key part of the whole friend thing, actually, that you do things for each other.”
Jensen still looks torn, but it’s like Jared used a magic word or something when he said “friend,” because Jensen finally relaxes and says,
“Well, if you’re really sure it wouldn’t be too much trouble - “
“Positive,” Jared says firmly.
“Thanks, man,” Jensen says fervently. “Seriously, you’re saving my life here.”
Jared rolls his eyes and waves Jensen off. “Yeah, whatever. Save the sappy shit and buy me a drink, bitch.”
He’s smiling as Jensen grins and jumps up to grab them drinks, but when Jensen’s out of eyesight, it dims a little.
“Jared,” Allie starts.
“Yeah, I know.”
“This really isn’t a good - “
“I know,” Jared repeats. “But I’m doing it anyway. Can we not talk about this, please?”
They really can’t, not with the way Jared feels about Jensen and the way the situation has serious potential for an all-out trainwreck, but they’re in the middle of a busy bar and Jared’s resolutely avoiding her eyes, and Allie supposes it can wait.
She’s still going to tell Jared just how many ways this could go wrong (because if Jensen ends up doing something to hurt Jared, Allie will have to kill him, and that will be sad and messy and totally fuck up her perfectly balanced wedding party), but not right now.
Instead, she pastes a smile on and says, “So, did we decide on blue?”
“I still like the pink,” Adrianne says.
“I still don’t know why it matters,” Jared says. “Seriously, it’s chocolate. It’s all good.” He’s smiling a little, and Allie sighs.
Because sometimes, even when you’re a totally awesome friend, there’s only so much you can do for someone who’s bound and determined to get their big dumb heart broken. And sometimes, the only thing you can really do is be there to pick up the pieces after. And there’s no question about that - no matter what happens, she and Adrianne and Mike (even though he’s emotionally stunted) will always be there. She hopes he knows that.
Jared gives her a grateful smile over the glossy pages of pastel cakes, and Allie thinks probably he does.
*
Jared loves Allie and Adrianne, he really does, but they are not subtle. They’re pretty much the least subtle people he knows, actually, and that’s just with everyday stuff like kicking Jared out of the living room so they can have blissfully-engaged-people sex on the couch or something (which they hint at by starting a hardcore makeout session while Jared’s still next to them on that couch). When it comes to imparting delicate relationship advice, they’re about as subtle as a nuclear explosion.
Which means he’s spent most of the week getting thinly veiled warnings with his breakfast cereal and hints about imminent doom every time he so much as mentions Jensen’s name. Bringing up the actual game gets him twin looks worried enough to give him an ulcer by default. He ends up fleeing the apartment just for a few hours free of anvilicious advice.
They mean well. Jared knows that. They’re doing this because they care. But if they think that Jared’s going to pass up the opportunity to be Jensen’s pretend boyfriend for a few hours - a few hours during which he’s free to flirt and look lovesick and touch Jensen as much as he wants - then they don’t know him very well. Because it’s fake, yeah, but it’s also Jared’s one chance to have Jensen. And even if it’s only for a little while, he wants to know what it feels like, to finally be able to know that Jensen is his.
So when he and Jensen walk through the giant doors of the arena, he doesn’t waste a second. “Come on, honey,” he tells Jensen, grabbing his hand. “I think it’s this way.”
“Thanks, sweetie,” Jensen replies dryly. “You do realize my boss is several floors away, right?”
“Just getting into character,” Jared says brightly.
Jensen snorts, but he doesn’t take his hand back. “There is no character. My boss doesn’t even know Ben. You’re just supposed to be you.”
“I’m supposed to be your hockey-loving boyfriend,” Jared corrects him. “Don’t worry. I know your type by now.”
Jensen gives him a funny look, like he can’t decide if he should say something. “Um,” he says finally. “You do?”
“Sure,” Jared says. “You go for the professional, put-together types. Pretty boys.”
“Hey,” Jensen says, sounding offended.
“Well, it kind of makes sense,” Jared points out. “I mean, you’re pretty pretty yourself.”
“Which makes you a pretty, pretty princess for agreeing to fake-date me,” Jensen shoots back. “Can we be done with the pretty crap now?”
Jared rolls his eyes. “What I was trying to say, before you interrupted, is that you go for pretty boys with an edge. There’s always something about them that’s a little ugly - they’re cocky or self-absorbed or whatever. They have asshole tendencies.”
“That is such bullshit,” Jensen says as they stop to wait for an elevator. “I do not go out with assholes. Ben was not an asshole.”
“Jensen, he dumped you because he wasn’t the constant center of your attention.”
“He dumped me because I blew him off,” Jensen corrects.
“Because your friend was in the hospital,” Jared points out. “That’s pretty much the definition of asshole.”
Jensen sighs, stabbing the elevator call button. “Whatever. Can we worry about bigger things? Like what the hell we’re going to say to my boss?”
The doors slide open, and Jared pushes Jensen inside before pushing the button for the right floor. “Dude,” he says, noticing how tense
Jensen’s shoulders are under his hands. “Relax. It’s going to be fine.”
“I don’t know,” Jensen says, fidgeting as the doors shut. “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.”
Jared uses his grip on Jensen’s shoulders to turn him around so they’re facing each other. “Hey,” he says, “I was just messing with you. Seriously, it’s going to be okay. Your boss probably won’t even say two words to me. And if he does, I’ll just talk about how awesome you are.” Given how completely stupid Jared is over Jensen, that part won’t exactly be hard.
“Thanks for doing this,” Jensen says. “Really. I know it’s - “
“Dude, I’m getting sweet tickets to a hockey game with free food,” Jared deflects. “I should be thanking you.” He grins, nudging Jensen with an elbow. “I wasn’t kidding about the asshole part, though. Just so you know. It’s going to be really hard to resist me when I’m being mean to you, so watch out.”
Jensen raises his eyebrows, then bursts out laughing. “Oh, Jared,” he says, shaking his head. “You’ve never been mean a day in your life. I don’t think I have to worry.”
“Why does everyone say that?” Jared wonders as they reach their floor and exit the elevator. “I am too mean sometimes. When I was a kid, I decapitated all of my sister’s Barbies.”
“Did you make her cry?”
“Well, no,” Jared admits. “She helped. But it’s not my fault that my sister is smart enough to reject Barbie’s improbable proportions.”
Jensen just shakes his head. “It’s okay, Jared. Being incapable of being an asshole is a good thing. Don’t strain yourself.”
It’s actually not, not when the person you’re stupidly in love with has a thing for assholes. “I can be a jerk,” Jared says stubbornly as they approach the door to the box. If it will make Jensen like him just a little bit more, he can definitely be an ass.
Jensen gives him a pitying look. “You do realize you’re holding the door open for me right now, right?”
Damn it.
Jared pushes Jensen inside. Fine, then. “Get me a drink, bitch.”
Jensen just laughs. Jared decides he needs to work on making his tone more threatening, or at least a little menacing. But then Jensen says, “C’mon, I see my boss,” and takes Jared’s hand to lead him over, and okay. Jared can live with that.
He looks around the box as they make their way across the room, and it’s really fucking amazing. The front of the room opens out onto the ice, with comfy leather seats with a great view, but there are flatscreen TVs showing the arena all around, so even the people standing at tables or sitting on the leather couches can see what’s going on. There’s a full bar on one side of the room, and, best of all, a giant buffet of food that takes up one whole entire wall. Jared thinks just being here has ruined the fold-down seats in sticky, narrow concrete rows forever.
Jensen slows them to a stop in front of a knot of people and waits a second for the loudest one, a well-dressed guy with thick-rimmed glasses, to notice him.
“Jensen!” the guy exclaims, shifting his drink to shake Jensen’s hand. “Good to see you, kid!”
“Yeah, you too,” Jensen says. “Thanks for inviting us.”
The guy waves it off, pointing at Jared. “So, this must be the boyfriend?”
“Yeah, this is Jared. Jared, Grant is the head of marketing and communications.”
“Great to meet you,” Jared says, shaking his hand. “Thanks so much for the invite, man.”
“No problem,” Grant says magnanimously. “I heard you’re a hockey fan.”
And since he’s supposed to be one of Jensen’s pretty-boy boyfriends and also a rich asshole, Jared figures what the hell and goes for it. “Definitely. I travel too much for season tickets, but I try to catch a game whenever I’m in town.”
“Smart man,” Grant says, nodding. “What do you think of the team this year?”
Jared shrugs. “Defense is looking a little weak, but - “
“Yeah, that game against Capitals last week was painful,” Grant agrees. “But Ovechkin’s the best scorer in the league, so he’s an exception to any rule. Did you see that goal he made a few weeks back where he bounced it off the goalie’s legs?” He whistles. “Pure poetry.”
“Yeah, he’s really - “
“And the kid can hit, too!” Grant goes on. “Little cocky, yeah, but he’s still young.”
And that’s about where Jared figures out what kind of a guy Grant is, and that he knows exactly how to handle people like him. Because Jared spends a lot of time with teenagers, and if there’s one thing he’s learned about dealing with people whose social skills are still developing (or totally stunted, in Grant’s case), it’s how to nod and smile and act fascinated by what they say.
Of course, it’s a lot easier when it’s a fifteen-year-old kid, because they generally mean well (and have egos smaller than the Empire State Building) but whatever. He laughs in the right places and looks duly impressed by Grant’s analysis of last year’s playoffs and by the time Jensen interrupts to say that they should go grab some drinks, Grant is eating out of Jared’s hand. He doesn’t know a single thing about him (or his new fake-boyfriend persona, anyway) but he shakes Jared’s hand again before Jensen drags him away and compliments Jensen on landing a good one.
Jensen shakes his head as they walk away. “Sorry, man, he can go on forever when you get him going.”
“S’okay,” Jared says. “Allie and Adrianne say the same thing about me.”
“Yeah, but you at least make sure the other person hasn’t died of boredom,” Jensen points out. “Grant would probably strike up a conversation with a houseplant if you left him alone long enough.”
“Hey, plants are good listeners.”
Jensen shoots him a look. “And you know that because - ?”
Jared shrugs. “It’s totally been scientifically proven that they grow better when you give them attention. And just because they’re plants doesn’t mean they don’t appreciate a little serenading now and then. Everyone needs affection.”
Jensen’s mouth quirks like he’s trying hard not to laugh. “Any particular genre?”
Jared shrugs. “Mine seem to appreciate ABBA.”
Jensen really does laugh, then. Jared has kind of a serious weakness for Jensen’s laugh (and a disturbing tendency to make an ass of himself to encourage it) so he does a falsetto version of the chorus of Waterloo along with a little dance, shaking his hips as he mimes watering the plants.
Considering the way the way everyone in a ten foot radius turns to see what’s going on and Jensen has to lean against the wall to stay upright while laughing himself sick, Jared thinks he’s succeeded on both counts - making Jensen laugh and making an ass of himself - pretty much equally.
“That’s right,” he says, when Jensen finally stops to wipe his eyes. “You landed yourself a winner, baby.”
“How did I ever get so lucky?” Jensen wonders.
“I also won the spelling bee when I was in fourth grade,” Jared tells him. “I’m a man of many talents.”
“I do love a man who can spell,” Jensen says. “It’s just so sexy.”
“That’s me,” Jared says. “Sexy with a capital S-E-C-K-S-Y. I can also use it in a sentence if you want.”
“That’s okay,” Jensen says. “Just get that sexy spelling bee champ ass over to the bar and get us some beers, huh?”
“Coming right up,” Jared says with a wink, and, just because he can, a nice, firm slap to Jensen’s ass. “Honey.”
Jensen glares, but Jared just waves as he walks away. This fake-boyfriend thing? It’s actually kind of fun.
*
It gets even more fun, later. Once the game starts some people start migrating over to the seats, and Jared takes the opportunity to attack the buffet. Once he has a plate heaped with an amount of food roughly the size of his head, he snags a table by one of the TVs and stuffs his face with some seriously awesome finger food. Jensen’s eyes widen at the sheer amount of food Jared has crammed on one plate, but Jared ignores him. He’ll share. Well, a little. After his next plate.
And then, since he is actually at a hockey game and in a box with awesome seats, he drags Jensen over to the arena seats and snags them a place right along the railing behind the rows of seats. They start out leaning up against it next to each other, but then Jared remembers that he doesn’t have to keep an appropriate distance between the two of them (or, well, as appropriate as he ever gets, anyway) and figures what the hell. Oh-so-casually, careful not to startle Jensen, Jared shifts over to stand close behind him. Jensen turns and blinks up at him, but when Jared gives him a reassuring boyfriendly smile and lets his hands settle on the railing on either side of Jensen, Jensen just turns back to the game.
And a few minutes later, when the ref misses a totally obvious hooking call and Jensen turns a little to share his disgust with Jared, he leans back, just brushing up against Jared’s chest, and when he turns to face forward again, he doesn’t really straighten up. And then Jared’s hands migrate toward each other on the railing, sliding in front of Jensen’s waist, and about then Jared decides they should just call an apple an apple and admit that they’re pretty much cuddling right there at the hockey game.
Because Jensen’s standing in the circle of his arms, close enough that Jared can smell the aftershave on his skin, touching Jared everywhere from his shoulders to his waist. It’s a good thing there’s a close game going on in front of them to distract him, because otherwise Jared’s pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to resist leaning down and tasting Jensen’s neck, nibbling along that skin to where it disappears under his collar.
And, strangely enough, it feels good. Jared thought it would still kind of suck, knowing that he has to give this up at the end of the night, but somehow it doesn’t. It just feels right, that he gets to have this. That he doesn’t have to stop himself from flirting or looking or touching Jensen. It’s comfortable, familiar, like they’ve been doing this forever.
And when the Rangers even it up in the third and make a short-handed goal to win it in the last five minutes, Jared’s honestly not sure the whole night could get any better. He throws his arms into the air with the rest of the crowd, slaps a high-five from Grant, and presses a kiss to Jensen’s temple.
When Jensen just grins up at him, Jared decides that yep, there’s pretty much no way this night could get better. Which is why it’s a little surprising, when he leaves Jensen in a knot of work people for a minute to grab a little post-game dessert, that it suddenly gets a million times better.
*
Jensen doesn’t believe in karma or superstition, not really. But he’s had a weird feeling all night that just won’t go away. It’s not because he’s worried or nervous - he was before they came, because this whole set-up just had romantic-comedy-humiliating-mix-up written all over it, but that went away after his boss decided Jared was the best thing since sliced bread - it’s actually kind of the opposite. Things seem to be going far, far too well.
Like the whole thing with Jared and his boss. Grant has the attention span of a gnat on speed, so the fact that he actually talked to Jared for a good five minutes without getting distracted is a little amazing all by itself. The fact that he also remembered Jared’s name for the rest of the night is nothing less than incredible.
And then there’s the whole part with Jared.
Because Jensen thought this would be weird or awkward or uncomfortable at the very least, he and Jared acting out something they came so close to before, and he’s kind of unprepared for how weird and awkward and uncomfortable it’s not.
Jared touches him almost constantly, a hand at his back when they walk or on his hip when they stop to talk to people, and then there’s that whole thing where they’re basically wrapped around each other as they watch the game, and Jensen keeps waiting for it to be too much, and it just never gets there.
Somehow, being almost constantly surrounded by Jared feels…right. As he stands with Jared’s arms around him, Jensen finds himself relaxing back into Jared’s hold, all his tension melting away. It’s like something crooked inside of him finally settles into place. It feels natural.
And the stupid thing is, Jared was right about Jensen’s type. He does go for the asshole pretty-boy types. But that’s not Jared. Well, he’s definitely pretty, but he’s not an asshole. He doesn’t have that sharp edge that always catches Jensen’s interest - he’s sweet and kind and good all the way through. And somehow, instead of being boring like Jensen would have thought, a good-looking nice guy is actually, well…nice. Surprisingly good. Different, but good.
When Jared wanders off after the game ends, Jensen keeps missing bits and pieces of the conversation going on around him, and he finally realizes he’s so distracted because he’s waiting for Jared to come back - anticipating arms around him and warmth behind him and maybe even another repeat of that winning-goal kiss. And that’s right about when it hits him, just how much he wants that.
He turns just enough to see the food table, just to check - and yep, there’s Jared, always easy to find in a crowd. He’s holding an empty plate, obviously waylaid by someone before he could get to the food, but he seems to sense Jensen’s eyes on him, because he picks that exact moment to glance out across the room and meet his gaze.
When Jared sees Jensen, he gives him this totally carefree, happy grin - no faking or flirting or artifice, just a bright grin like, oh, there you are! Like no matter what the conversation is about, his thoughts are with Jensen instead, and he can’t wait to get back.
And that moment - when Jensen’s stomach does a little flip and something warm spreads through his chest - that’s when he realizes that he’s been wanting this for a while. A lot longer than he’s let himself admit.
And given the way that Jensen doesn’t do serious relationships - like, ever - it’s kind of scary to realize that he actually wants to date Jared. Date Jared. Like, spend time with him and cuddle on couches with him and wake up early just to sleep in with him.
It’s a good thing the conversation dies out and the people wander off, because there’s no way Jensen’s coming up with any kind of intelligent remarks, not while he’s having a total existential crisis. Jesus, he doesn’t do this. It’s not him. But then there’s the last two hours that he’s spent happily playing boyfriends with Jared, which are undeniable proof that he obviously does do this. And likes it.
Fuck. What the hell is he supposed to do?
*
It takes ten minutes of serious thinking (and watching the zamboni make hypnotizing circles around the ice, because Jensen can’t make these kinds of decisions while staring at the wall) before Jensen comes up with some kind of answer. He still doesn’t know what the hell he’s going to do (or what the hell is going to happen), but he does know that he’d be an idiot to not do something. It might fuck up his friendship with Jared, but it might turn out to be the best thing he’s ever done. He has to know.
It’s nothing short of terrifying, so when Jensen finally sees Jared heading his way, he steels himself to do it right away. He repeats what he’s going to say in his head so it can’t get messed up, and he’s just taking a deep breath to say hey, so, I was thinking that maybe we should give this thing a try when he notices Jared’s expression.
It’s kind of dazed, almost starstruck, like he’s been stunned silent. But he hasn’t, because as soon as he gets close enough, Jared opens his mouth and says, stunned, “I just met the man of my dreams.”
Jensen’s heart stutters painfully, but before he can even react, Jared goes on, “We both reached for the last brownie, and our hands brushed. And then I offered to let him have it, since I’ve already had a ton of food, but he said no, he’d never want to deprive someone of chocolate, then he wouldn’t be able to sleep at night. And so he said we should split it, but it turned out to have this amazing gooey melted chocolate center and it got all over both of us, and we were both licking it off our fingers and hands and trying to stop it from spilling everywhere, and then we started laughing at how ridiculous it was, and Jesus, he’s gorgeous, the best smile I’ve ever seen and bright blue eyes, and it was like this lightning bolt of chemistry zinged between us, like an instant connection. And then he helped me get cleaned up and gave me a handful of Hershey’s kisses to make up for it, and - oh my god.”
Jared finally breaks off his epic explanation, and Jensen’s relieved that he finally realized how ridiculous he sounds, but Jared only pauses for a second before he says, “Oh my god, Jensen. I let him get away.”
“What?” Jensen asks, more sharply than he intends.
“I just let him walk away. He flirted and gave me kisses and I just let him walk away without getting his number. Fuck, I didn’t even get his name!” Jared drops his head into his hands, moaning. “Shit, shit, shit. How the fuck am I going to find him now?”
“Find him?” Jensen repeats a little faintly.
“Yeah,” Jared says. “I have to find him. He’s like, the most awesome person I’ve ever met. I have to find him so that I can thank him and make out with him and propose marriage so we can spend our lives together.”
And half of that is obviously just drama on Jared’s part, but the stupid thing is, Jensen can tell he means the other half - that he’s totally serious about finding this guy and hopefully having some kind of relationship with him. And that’s just - shit. Worst timing ever.
“Do you know who he was?” Jared wants to know. “Tall, brown hair, blue eyes - well, not robin’s egg, more like grey-blue or cobalt or something, with almost a hint of green - “
“Sorry,” Jensen interrupts, before Jared can wax poetic on any more of this guy, who he’s pretty sure he already hates. “I didn’t know most of the people at this thing. Just a few people from work.”
“And you don’t know anyone at work with brown hair and bluish-greenish eyes and a perfect smile?”
Jensen bites down on the sarcastic reply he’d like to make. “No,” he says instead. “There are a lot of people at my work that could fit that description.”
“Oh,” Jared says, deflating.
Jensen kind of hopes that’s the end of the whole thing, but the whole time they’re leaving the arena, going down a million flights of stairs with the rest of the people from the game, he can feel Jared searching the crowd for any hint of his mystery guy.
And when they get to the parking garage and they’re heading for the bank of elevators to their level, Jared suddenly freezes. Up ahead, a crowd of people are moving forward to get into an arriving elevator, and Jared grabs Jensen’s arm in an iron grip and hisses, “There he is!”
He barely wastes a second after that taking off for the elevators, but even Jensen can see that he’s not going to be in time. And he also sees something else - that his karma is seriously fucked. Because the brown-haired magical-eyed perfect-smile guy Jared is chasing is indeed one of his coworkers, and Jensen recognizes him immediately as one of the department’s copy editors. A seriously cute, very nice, very single one who would be perfect for Jared.
He only has a second to think about it - about staying quiet and pretending he has no idea who Mr. Perfect is and trying to keep Jared from stalking his work, just in case - but then Jensen remembers the way Jared’s face lit up as he talked about this guy, and after a second of disbelief at the true stupidity of the universe, he gives in.
“Michael!” he yells. “Hey, Cassidy! Wait up!”
Michael stops immediately, just outside the elevator, and the doors slide closed just as Jared runs up to him. And even from thirty feet away, Jensen can see him grin when he sees Jared coming for him.
Jensen stays back as they talk, not wanting any part of it, but he can’t stop himself from watching as they pull out their phones and exchange numbers. Jared’s uncharacteristically (adorably, his brain puts in unhelpfully) shy, ducking his head and blushing at whatever Michael says, but he can’t stop grinning. When they finally part, Jensen moves forward, hoping they can get out of there, but they only get a few steps apart before Michael turns around and drags Jared into a kiss, right there in the parking garage. Jensen feels like punching something.
And then there’s more quiet talking and smiling, and by the time Jared finally gets back to where Jensen’s standing, he’s smiling so wide it looks like it hurts. Jensen just really wants to go home and forget this night ever happened.
Jared’s quiet on the cab ride home, which is weird enough, but he keeps rubbing his lips absently, like he’s remembering Michael kissing him.
“Thanks, man,” Jared says sincerely when they get to his building, bent in half as he leans into the cab. “Thanks for calling out to Michael. I’d have been kicking myself forever if I couldn’t find him.”
“No problem,” Jensen makes himself say. “Thanks for coming and helping with my boss.”
“Don’t mention it,” Jared says. “Well. I guess the night worked out for both of us, huh?”
Jensen decides his forgetting plan is definitely involving alcohol. A lot of it. “Yeah,” he says, with a weak smile. “Definitely.”
Jared grins and waves as he closes the door, and Jensen thinks that he really should have paid attention to that bad feeling he had earlier. That weird unease, that feeling like everything was going so right that something must be about to go wrong? Yeah. He definitely should have listened.
*
Part Four
Jared isn’t really sure how to be just friends with Jensen (or if that’s even going to work, to be honest) but he takes a shot at it and invites Jensen out for drinks with Mike, Allie and Adrianne.
It’s weird at first, trying to find a balance between paying too much or not enough attention to each other (because if you go with the less is more theory you risk looking like a douche who’s awkwardly avoiding the other person, and if you go too far the other way, you end up with creepy, desperate staring), but alcohol helps, as it always does, and by the end of the night Jared’s drunk enough to actually talk to Jensen in a semi-normal way, and he starts thinking this friends thing might be okay. You know, occasionally or whatever. Every once in a while.
Which is, of course, when Jensen lets it slip that he interviewed someone who does wedding cakes for an article once, and roughly two seconds after he pulls up the girl’s website on his phone, Allie and Adrianne are squealing over the pictures with girly glee and insisting they have to have one. And when it turns out Jensen knows this Victoria chick well enough to swing them a discount, there are very nearly declarations of undying love. And just like that, without any say from Jared at all, Jensen is suddenly inextricably involved in the wedding planning.
Which is fine. If Allie and Adrianne are going to drag Jared on a tour of every possible wedding location in New York, he’d much rather have Jensen along with him than Mike.
And spending time with Jensen is good, too. They’ve already proven with several dates that they get along pretty well, and hanging out - whether at the bar, at department stores full of potential wedding gifts or at someone’s apartment - is almost the same thing. It even gets comfortable enough that the two of them hang out alone a few times.
It doesn’t stop Jared from wanting Jensen, of course. He’s pretty sure that whoever said that crap about absence making the heart grow fonder never tried being friends with someone they had unrequited feelings for, because no matter how much time Jared spends with Jensen, he never ends up liking him an iota less. Exactly the opposite, in fact - it seems like every time he discovers a new habit or quirk or hobby of Jensen’s he likes him even more. And those things that he already knew and liked about Jensen? Those just get stronger. It’s hard to be around Jensen, sometimes.
Because when he makes Jensen laugh about something stupid - a real laugh, not a polite, fake chuckle - warmth spreads through Jared’s chest. When Jensen grins at him, there’s no way Jared can keep an answering smile off his face. When Jensen absent-mindedly says something like, “Oh, thanks, you’re amazing,” Jared can’t help the pleased rush he gets. And when Jensen touches his arm or leans into him or falls asleep on his couch after a movie, it’s hard not to just reach out and touch him, to show him just how much Jared wants.
But he doesn’t. He keeps his hands and his feelings and his desires strictly to himself, because that’s what a friend does. If this is the only way he can have Jensen, then he’s taking it.
And if Jensen happens to mention that the website where he publishes his writing is getting a criminally low amount of hits and Jared maybe happens to send a link in an email to his entire school promising donuts at the next faculty meeting if everyone forwards it to their family and friends, well. That’s just being a good friend. The shocked-but-happy look on Jensen’s face when he tells them about a compliment from his boss on the increased traffic is more than worth it, even if Jared did have to tell people it was a site offering free DVDs instead of fluff journalism.
It’s still not easy, though. Being Jensen’s friend sometimes means stepping in as his wingman, if Mike is busy or incapacitated or making one of his lame attempts to use a Halloween costume as an undercover disguise (seriously, how is it fair that the universe rewards Mike with sex for throwing on a jumpsuit and pirating a backstory from Top Gun?), and watching Jensen flirt with another guy is about as much fun as a trip to the dentist. Watching Jensen go home with another guy is like getting a root canal without anesthesia.
It’s especially hard when Jensen starts dating Ben, who’s movie-star gorgeous and oil-tycoon-rich, but the intellectual equivalent of a baked potato. Or at least that’s what Jared assumes, because the one time they hang out, when Ben scores them an invite to some exclusive party, he spends the entire night glued to his iPhone, texting and talking and basically ignoring his extremely hot date. Jared spends the entire night wanting to punch him in the face.
But Jensen wasn’t kidding about not wanting something serious, and when Jared catches a killer strain of pneumonia from one of his students and has to spend two days in the hospital after the holidays, Jensen almost never leaves his side. He sneaks Jared food he’s not supposed to have, mocks daytime talkshows with him, and doesn’t make fun when Jared actually gets a little caught up in an improbable paralysis storyline on As the World Turns. His phone rings a few times, and Jared catches Ben’s name on the screen, but Jensen just shoves it in his pocket. By the time Jared’s out of the hospital, Jensen and Ben are over.
And that’s really the reason Jared ends up being okay with this whole friends thing - because it may have broken his stupid heart just a little when Jensen didn’t want something serious with him, but now that Jensen’s dating other guys, it doesn’t bother Jared very much. Jensen goes out with other guys, Jensen sleeps with other guys, and Jensen breaks up with other guys. Jared doesn’t get to date Jensen or have sex with Jensen, but he doesn’t get dumped. No matter what Jensen’s love life is like, he’s always Jared’s friend. The other guys come and go, but Jared keeps his place in Jensen’s life.
And maybe that’s a little bit pathetic, to be happy with that little piece of Jensen, but he can’t bring himself to regret it.
And maybe karma’s working for him or his luck is finally turning around, because it’s his friendship with Jensen that’s responsible for Jared meeting the second-most perfect guy he’s ever laid eyes on: Michael.
*
“I don’t know, I kind of like the pink one,” Adrianne says, tilting her head. “The gold swirls are really pretty.”
“But the green one has the little rosebuds,” Allie points out. “It’s totally adorable.”
“But that shade of green is a little weird. The blue one might work, actually.”
“It’s a little rounder than the others, but it is nice.”
“It’s subtle, but it’s classy.”
“Exactly,” Allie nods.
“Ladies,” Jared says. “Not to be nitpicking, but you seem to have missed a vital step in the cake-choosing process.”
Mike raises an eyebrow. “Which would be…?”
“What the cake tastes like,” Jared says, exasperated. “You’ve spent half an hour debating what it looks like, but you haven’t even talked about what kind of cake it’s going to be!” He waves a hand. “Lemon? Raspberry? Almond? Vanilla? This is a serious issue!”
Allie can’t help herself - one look at Adrianne and she bursts out laughing. “Oh, Jared, sweetheart,” she says, shaking her head. “You’re so naïve.”
“Because I think the cake should look good and taste good?”
“No, because you’ve lived with us for eight years and you think we actually have to discuss what kind of cake it’s going to be,” Adrianne says.
“Chocolate,” Allie tells him when he still looks confused. “With a layer of chocolate filling.”
Jared’s grin spreads across his whole face. “I knew there was a reason I liked you girls.”
“Dude,” Mike says. “If I knew you were this easy, I’d have been bribing you with baked goods a long time ago.”
Adrianne raises her eyebrows. “How did you think we con Jared into doing all the dirty chores?”
Mike grins and opens his mouth, but before he can say anything that Allie will have to smack him for, Jensen throws himself down across the booth from her and says, “Fuck, I am so totally screwed. Worst day ever.”
“I don’t know,” Mike says, looking him up and down. “You’ve still got all your clothes and I don’t see any embarrassing tattoos. You’re still miles away from my worst day.”
“Which is a good thing,” Adrianne points out. “Besides,” she says with a grin, “Just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they’re not there.”
“Ooh, do you have a naughty unicorn tattoo?” Allie asks, shoving her list of wedding to-do’s out of the way. Fairytale animals inked on Jensen’s ass are way more exciting than the logistics of wedding invitations.
“No, no, I got it,” Jared declares, waving his hands for quiet. “Two unicorns.” He grins slyly. “Two, big, muscular stallions crossing horns.”
Jensen shakes his head as all four of them crack up. “Jesus, you guys. No, no one held me down and forcibly tattooed me. This was more of a case of really bad timing on my boss’s part.” He sighs. “And a really unfortunate choice on my part not to suck it up and tell the truth.”
“Which is what?” Adrianne asks. “C’mon, cut the theatrics and tell us what happened.”
“My boss’s boss invited me to watch a Rangers game in his suite tomorrow night.”
There’s a moment of silence after that announcement, which was really not what Allie was expecting. Quite frankly, she likes the sexin’ ass unicorns better.
“Wow,” Mike says dryly. “What’s next, is this asshole going to force a fancy car on you? I don’t know how you stand such horrible working conditions.”
“Shut up, I’m not done,” Jensen says, elbowing Mike. “He only invited me because I told him my boyfriend is a huge hockey fan.”
Adrianne frowns. “What boyfriend?”
“Ben.”
“Okay, hang on, I’m confused,” Jared interrupts. “Ben’s not your boyfriend. Or, at least, not anymore.”
“I know,” Jensen says, rubbing his temples. “But this guy - my boss’s boss - he almost never bothers talking to the little people. So when
he was a little drunk and friendly at the office holiday party, I told him my boyfriend was really into hockey. So he’d notice me.”
“But then you and Ben broke up.”
Jensen groans. “I know. But he doesn’t know that. And when he invited me to the game, I was way too psyched that he even knew who I was to think about it. And so I kind of forgot to tell him that the hockey-loving boyfriend is now a hockey-loving ex-boyfriend. Who no longer acknowledges my existence or answers my phone calls.”
“So tell him you can’t go,” Adrianne points out sensibly. “Whoops, you forgot you had to take your parents out for their anniversary. Problem solved.”
“But I have to go. Not just for the hockey,” he amends hastily at her look. “This guy could totally make or break my career. He’s the one who’s going to decide who replaces my editor when the guy retires next year. If I can make a good impression, I’ll have an edge on a promotion.” He grimaces. “And seriously, after today’s human interest story on geriatric snakes, I could really use some better assignments.”
Mike snorts. “Technically, that’d be a reptilian interest story.” He tilts his head. “Is there snake porn?”
“Wow,” Jared says. “It literally took you less than two seconds to go there.”
“Hey, it’s a talent.”
“It’s disturbing, is what it is.”
“Can we get back to my problems, please?” Jensen asks plaintively.
Allie reaches across the table to pat his arm reassuringly. “Of course, Jensen. So, what it comes down to is that you need to go to this thing. And somehow you need to magically find a hockey-loving boyfriend to go with you.”
“Pretty much,” Jensen agrees morosely.
“Well, the boyfriend part kind of counts out me and Adrianne,” Allie admits. “But maybe we can find you someone to pretend to be Ben.”
“Mike likes hockey,” Adrianne points out.
“But not men,” Mike points out.
At her dirty look, he shrugs. “Hey, I’d totally go if all you needed was someone to eat the food and watch the game. But schmoozing with the boss and making googly eyes and holding your hand? I don’t even do that stuff with women. It’s a little out of my comfort zone.”
Jensen shrugs. “Fair enough.”
“Okay,” Allie says, determined to find a solution to this problem. “So maybe if we just find a way to temporarily brainwash Ben into - “
“I’ll do it.”
A long moment of silence follows Jared’s announcement. He raises his eyebrows as he looks around the table. “What? I like hockey. I like Jensen. I’m not afraid to hold his hand and say mushy stuff about our big gay love.” He shrugs. “I think it’d work.”
And that’s just it, because it wouldn’t, not really. Allie knows that with just as much certainty as she knows that Adrianne loves her. Jared’s trying to do a good thing here, following that giant heart of his, but no matter how comfortable he and Jensen have gotten over the past few months, no matter what Jared might think or say, he’s not over Jensen. And this? This has the potential to bring all that buried hurt to the surface and fuck everything up.
Thankfully, Allie doesn’t even have to send Adrianne a worried look - before she can even react, Adrianne says, “But Jared, what about the thing?”
Jared blinks. “Thing?”
“Yeah,” Adrianne says. “You know. That thing with the…meatloaf. Tomorrow.”
Allie wrinkles her nose. Meatloaf?
Oh, shut up, says the look Adrianne levels her. I’m on the spot and you’re not helping.
That’s because meatloaf is gross, Allie says with a roll of her eyes. But when Jared looks quizzically at her, she nods and says, “That’s right. Jared, you promised to cook your mom’s famous meatloaf for dinner tomorrow, remember? To thank us for being such awesome friends.”
She smiles sweetly.
All three of the men look baffled by this turn of the conversation, but Jared’s quick to catch on. “That’s okay,” he says, waving a hand. “It’s not a big deal. We’ll do it some other time.”
“But you’ve been planning it for - “
“Really,” Jared says firmly, glaring a little. “I appreciate the enthusiasm, but it’s fine. Really.”
“Jared, I can’t ask you to do that,” Jensen says reluctantly.
“Do what?” Jared asks. “Spend a few hours with you - which I do already - and watch a hockey game. Which I also do already.”
“Yeah, but - “
“All you’re asking me for is a favor,” Jared says. “And friends ask each other for favors all the time. I’m pretty sure that’s a key part of the whole friend thing, actually, that you do things for each other.”
Jensen still looks torn, but it’s like Jared used a magic word or something when he said “friend,” because Jensen finally relaxes and says,
“Well, if you’re really sure it wouldn’t be too much trouble - “
“Positive,” Jared says firmly.
“Thanks, man,” Jensen says fervently. “Seriously, you’re saving my life here.”
Jared rolls his eyes and waves Jensen off. “Yeah, whatever. Save the sappy shit and buy me a drink, bitch.”
He’s smiling as Jensen grins and jumps up to grab them drinks, but when Jensen’s out of eyesight, it dims a little.
“Jared,” Allie starts.
“Yeah, I know.”
“This really isn’t a good - “
“I know,” Jared repeats. “But I’m doing it anyway. Can we not talk about this, please?”
They really can’t, not with the way Jared feels about Jensen and the way the situation has serious potential for an all-out trainwreck, but they’re in the middle of a busy bar and Jared’s resolutely avoiding her eyes, and Allie supposes it can wait.
She’s still going to tell Jared just how many ways this could go wrong (because if Jensen ends up doing something to hurt Jared, Allie will have to kill him, and that will be sad and messy and totally fuck up her perfectly balanced wedding party), but not right now.
Instead, she pastes a smile on and says, “So, did we decide on blue?”
“I still like the pink,” Adrianne says.
“I still don’t know why it matters,” Jared says. “Seriously, it’s chocolate. It’s all good.” He’s smiling a little, and Allie sighs.
Because sometimes, even when you’re a totally awesome friend, there’s only so much you can do for someone who’s bound and determined to get their big dumb heart broken. And sometimes, the only thing you can really do is be there to pick up the pieces after. And there’s no question about that - no matter what happens, she and Adrianne and Mike (even though he’s emotionally stunted) will always be there. She hopes he knows that.
Jared gives her a grateful smile over the glossy pages of pastel cakes, and Allie thinks probably he does.
*
Jared loves Allie and Adrianne, he really does, but they are not subtle. They’re pretty much the least subtle people he knows, actually, and that’s just with everyday stuff like kicking Jared out of the living room so they can have blissfully-engaged-people sex on the couch or something (which they hint at by starting a hardcore makeout session while Jared’s still next to them on that couch). When it comes to imparting delicate relationship advice, they’re about as subtle as a nuclear explosion.
Which means he’s spent most of the week getting thinly veiled warnings with his breakfast cereal and hints about imminent doom every time he so much as mentions Jensen’s name. Bringing up the actual game gets him twin looks worried enough to give him an ulcer by default. He ends up fleeing the apartment just for a few hours free of anvilicious advice.
They mean well. Jared knows that. They’re doing this because they care. But if they think that Jared’s going to pass up the opportunity to be Jensen’s pretend boyfriend for a few hours - a few hours during which he’s free to flirt and look lovesick and touch Jensen as much as he wants - then they don’t know him very well. Because it’s fake, yeah, but it’s also Jared’s one chance to have Jensen. And even if it’s only for a little while, he wants to know what it feels like, to finally be able to know that Jensen is his.
So when he and Jensen walk through the giant doors of the arena, he doesn’t waste a second. “Come on, honey,” he tells Jensen, grabbing his hand. “I think it’s this way.”
“Thanks, sweetie,” Jensen replies dryly. “You do realize my boss is several floors away, right?”
“Just getting into character,” Jared says brightly.
Jensen snorts, but he doesn’t take his hand back. “There is no character. My boss doesn’t even know Ben. You’re just supposed to be you.”
“I’m supposed to be your hockey-loving boyfriend,” Jared corrects him. “Don’t worry. I know your type by now.”
Jensen gives him a funny look, like he can’t decide if he should say something. “Um,” he says finally. “You do?”
“Sure,” Jared says. “You go for the professional, put-together types. Pretty boys.”
“Hey,” Jensen says, sounding offended.
“Well, it kind of makes sense,” Jared points out. “I mean, you’re pretty pretty yourself.”
“Which makes you a pretty, pretty princess for agreeing to fake-date me,” Jensen shoots back. “Can we be done with the pretty crap now?”
Jared rolls his eyes. “What I was trying to say, before you interrupted, is that you go for pretty boys with an edge. There’s always something about them that’s a little ugly - they’re cocky or self-absorbed or whatever. They have asshole tendencies.”
“That is such bullshit,” Jensen says as they stop to wait for an elevator. “I do not go out with assholes. Ben was not an asshole.”
“Jensen, he dumped you because he wasn’t the constant center of your attention.”
“He dumped me because I blew him off,” Jensen corrects.
“Because your friend was in the hospital,” Jared points out. “That’s pretty much the definition of asshole.”
Jensen sighs, stabbing the elevator call button. “Whatever. Can we worry about bigger things? Like what the hell we’re going to say to my boss?”
The doors slide open, and Jared pushes Jensen inside before pushing the button for the right floor. “Dude,” he says, noticing how tense
Jensen’s shoulders are under his hands. “Relax. It’s going to be fine.”
“I don’t know,” Jensen says, fidgeting as the doors shut. “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.”
Jared uses his grip on Jensen’s shoulders to turn him around so they’re facing each other. “Hey,” he says, “I was just messing with you. Seriously, it’s going to be okay. Your boss probably won’t even say two words to me. And if he does, I’ll just talk about how awesome you are.” Given how completely stupid Jared is over Jensen, that part won’t exactly be hard.
“Thanks for doing this,” Jensen says. “Really. I know it’s - “
“Dude, I’m getting sweet tickets to a hockey game with free food,” Jared deflects. “I should be thanking you.” He grins, nudging Jensen with an elbow. “I wasn’t kidding about the asshole part, though. Just so you know. It’s going to be really hard to resist me when I’m being mean to you, so watch out.”
Jensen raises his eyebrows, then bursts out laughing. “Oh, Jared,” he says, shaking his head. “You’ve never been mean a day in your life. I don’t think I have to worry.”
“Why does everyone say that?” Jared wonders as they reach their floor and exit the elevator. “I am too mean sometimes. When I was a kid, I decapitated all of my sister’s Barbies.”
“Did you make her cry?”
“Well, no,” Jared admits. “She helped. But it’s not my fault that my sister is smart enough to reject Barbie’s improbable proportions.”
Jensen just shakes his head. “It’s okay, Jared. Being incapable of being an asshole is a good thing. Don’t strain yourself.”
It’s actually not, not when the person you’re stupidly in love with has a thing for assholes. “I can be a jerk,” Jared says stubbornly as they approach the door to the box. If it will make Jensen like him just a little bit more, he can definitely be an ass.
Jensen gives him a pitying look. “You do realize you’re holding the door open for me right now, right?”
Damn it.
Jared pushes Jensen inside. Fine, then. “Get me a drink, bitch.”
Jensen just laughs. Jared decides he needs to work on making his tone more threatening, or at least a little menacing. But then Jensen says, “C’mon, I see my boss,” and takes Jared’s hand to lead him over, and okay. Jared can live with that.
He looks around the box as they make their way across the room, and it’s really fucking amazing. The front of the room opens out onto the ice, with comfy leather seats with a great view, but there are flatscreen TVs showing the arena all around, so even the people standing at tables or sitting on the leather couches can see what’s going on. There’s a full bar on one side of the room, and, best of all, a giant buffet of food that takes up one whole entire wall. Jared thinks just being here has ruined the fold-down seats in sticky, narrow concrete rows forever.
Jensen slows them to a stop in front of a knot of people and waits a second for the loudest one, a well-dressed guy with thick-rimmed glasses, to notice him.
“Jensen!” the guy exclaims, shifting his drink to shake Jensen’s hand. “Good to see you, kid!”
“Yeah, you too,” Jensen says. “Thanks for inviting us.”
The guy waves it off, pointing at Jared. “So, this must be the boyfriend?”
“Yeah, this is Jared. Jared, Grant is the head of marketing and communications.”
“Great to meet you,” Jared says, shaking his hand. “Thanks so much for the invite, man.”
“No problem,” Grant says magnanimously. “I heard you’re a hockey fan.”
And since he’s supposed to be one of Jensen’s pretty-boy boyfriends and also a rich asshole, Jared figures what the hell and goes for it. “Definitely. I travel too much for season tickets, but I try to catch a game whenever I’m in town.”
“Smart man,” Grant says, nodding. “What do you think of the team this year?”
Jared shrugs. “Defense is looking a little weak, but - “
“Yeah, that game against Capitals last week was painful,” Grant agrees. “But Ovechkin’s the best scorer in the league, so he’s an exception to any rule. Did you see that goal he made a few weeks back where he bounced it off the goalie’s legs?” He whistles. “Pure poetry.”
“Yeah, he’s really - “
“And the kid can hit, too!” Grant goes on. “Little cocky, yeah, but he’s still young.”
And that’s about where Jared figures out what kind of a guy Grant is, and that he knows exactly how to handle people like him. Because Jared spends a lot of time with teenagers, and if there’s one thing he’s learned about dealing with people whose social skills are still developing (or totally stunted, in Grant’s case), it’s how to nod and smile and act fascinated by what they say.
Of course, it’s a lot easier when it’s a fifteen-year-old kid, because they generally mean well (and have egos smaller than the Empire State Building) but whatever. He laughs in the right places and looks duly impressed by Grant’s analysis of last year’s playoffs and by the time Jensen interrupts to say that they should go grab some drinks, Grant is eating out of Jared’s hand. He doesn’t know a single thing about him (or his new fake-boyfriend persona, anyway) but he shakes Jared’s hand again before Jensen drags him away and compliments Jensen on landing a good one.
Jensen shakes his head as they walk away. “Sorry, man, he can go on forever when you get him going.”
“S’okay,” Jared says. “Allie and Adrianne say the same thing about me.”
“Yeah, but you at least make sure the other person hasn’t died of boredom,” Jensen points out. “Grant would probably strike up a conversation with a houseplant if you left him alone long enough.”
“Hey, plants are good listeners.”
Jensen shoots him a look. “And you know that because - ?”
Jared shrugs. “It’s totally been scientifically proven that they grow better when you give them attention. And just because they’re plants doesn’t mean they don’t appreciate a little serenading now and then. Everyone needs affection.”
Jensen’s mouth quirks like he’s trying hard not to laugh. “Any particular genre?”
Jared shrugs. “Mine seem to appreciate ABBA.”
Jensen really does laugh, then. Jared has kind of a serious weakness for Jensen’s laugh (and a disturbing tendency to make an ass of himself to encourage it) so he does a falsetto version of the chorus of Waterloo along with a little dance, shaking his hips as he mimes watering the plants.
Considering the way the way everyone in a ten foot radius turns to see what’s going on and Jensen has to lean against the wall to stay upright while laughing himself sick, Jared thinks he’s succeeded on both counts - making Jensen laugh and making an ass of himself - pretty much equally.
“That’s right,” he says, when Jensen finally stops to wipe his eyes. “You landed yourself a winner, baby.”
“How did I ever get so lucky?” Jensen wonders.
“I also won the spelling bee when I was in fourth grade,” Jared tells him. “I’m a man of many talents.”
“I do love a man who can spell,” Jensen says. “It’s just so sexy.”
“That’s me,” Jared says. “Sexy with a capital S-E-C-K-S-Y. I can also use it in a sentence if you want.”
“That’s okay,” Jensen says. “Just get that sexy spelling bee champ ass over to the bar and get us some beers, huh?”
“Coming right up,” Jared says with a wink, and, just because he can, a nice, firm slap to Jensen’s ass. “Honey.”
Jensen glares, but Jared just waves as he walks away. This fake-boyfriend thing? It’s actually kind of fun.
*
It gets even more fun, later. Once the game starts some people start migrating over to the seats, and Jared takes the opportunity to attack the buffet. Once he has a plate heaped with an amount of food roughly the size of his head, he snags a table by one of the TVs and stuffs his face with some seriously awesome finger food. Jensen’s eyes widen at the sheer amount of food Jared has crammed on one plate, but Jared ignores him. He’ll share. Well, a little. After his next plate.
And then, since he is actually at a hockey game and in a box with awesome seats, he drags Jensen over to the arena seats and snags them a place right along the railing behind the rows of seats. They start out leaning up against it next to each other, but then Jared remembers that he doesn’t have to keep an appropriate distance between the two of them (or, well, as appropriate as he ever gets, anyway) and figures what the hell. Oh-so-casually, careful not to startle Jensen, Jared shifts over to stand close behind him. Jensen turns and blinks up at him, but when Jared gives him a reassuring boyfriendly smile and lets his hands settle on the railing on either side of Jensen, Jensen just turns back to the game.
And a few minutes later, when the ref misses a totally obvious hooking call and Jensen turns a little to share his disgust with Jared, he leans back, just brushing up against Jared’s chest, and when he turns to face forward again, he doesn’t really straighten up. And then Jared’s hands migrate toward each other on the railing, sliding in front of Jensen’s waist, and about then Jared decides they should just call an apple an apple and admit that they’re pretty much cuddling right there at the hockey game.
Because Jensen’s standing in the circle of his arms, close enough that Jared can smell the aftershave on his skin, touching Jared everywhere from his shoulders to his waist. It’s a good thing there’s a close game going on in front of them to distract him, because otherwise Jared’s pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to resist leaning down and tasting Jensen’s neck, nibbling along that skin to where it disappears under his collar.
And, strangely enough, it feels good. Jared thought it would still kind of suck, knowing that he has to give this up at the end of the night, but somehow it doesn’t. It just feels right, that he gets to have this. That he doesn’t have to stop himself from flirting or looking or touching Jensen. It’s comfortable, familiar, like they’ve been doing this forever.
And when the Rangers even it up in the third and make a short-handed goal to win it in the last five minutes, Jared’s honestly not sure the whole night could get any better. He throws his arms into the air with the rest of the crowd, slaps a high-five from Grant, and presses a kiss to Jensen’s temple.
When Jensen just grins up at him, Jared decides that yep, there’s pretty much no way this night could get better. Which is why it’s a little surprising, when he leaves Jensen in a knot of work people for a minute to grab a little post-game dessert, that it suddenly gets a million times better.
*
Jensen doesn’t believe in karma or superstition, not really. But he’s had a weird feeling all night that just won’t go away. It’s not because he’s worried or nervous - he was before they came, because this whole set-up just had romantic-comedy-humiliating-mix-up written all over it, but that went away after his boss decided Jared was the best thing since sliced bread - it’s actually kind of the opposite. Things seem to be going far, far too well.
Like the whole thing with Jared and his boss. Grant has the attention span of a gnat on speed, so the fact that he actually talked to Jared for a good five minutes without getting distracted is a little amazing all by itself. The fact that he also remembered Jared’s name for the rest of the night is nothing less than incredible.
And then there’s the whole part with Jared.
Because Jensen thought this would be weird or awkward or uncomfortable at the very least, he and Jared acting out something they came so close to before, and he’s kind of unprepared for how weird and awkward and uncomfortable it’s not.
Jared touches him almost constantly, a hand at his back when they walk or on his hip when they stop to talk to people, and then there’s that whole thing where they’re basically wrapped around each other as they watch the game, and Jensen keeps waiting for it to be too much, and it just never gets there.
Somehow, being almost constantly surrounded by Jared feels…right. As he stands with Jared’s arms around him, Jensen finds himself relaxing back into Jared’s hold, all his tension melting away. It’s like something crooked inside of him finally settles into place. It feels natural.
And the stupid thing is, Jared was right about Jensen’s type. He does go for the asshole pretty-boy types. But that’s not Jared. Well, he’s definitely pretty, but he’s not an asshole. He doesn’t have that sharp edge that always catches Jensen’s interest - he’s sweet and kind and good all the way through. And somehow, instead of being boring like Jensen would have thought, a good-looking nice guy is actually, well…nice. Surprisingly good. Different, but good.
When Jared wanders off after the game ends, Jensen keeps missing bits and pieces of the conversation going on around him, and he finally realizes he’s so distracted because he’s waiting for Jared to come back - anticipating arms around him and warmth behind him and maybe even another repeat of that winning-goal kiss. And that’s right about when it hits him, just how much he wants that.
He turns just enough to see the food table, just to check - and yep, there’s Jared, always easy to find in a crowd. He’s holding an empty plate, obviously waylaid by someone before he could get to the food, but he seems to sense Jensen’s eyes on him, because he picks that exact moment to glance out across the room and meet his gaze.
When Jared sees Jensen, he gives him this totally carefree, happy grin - no faking or flirting or artifice, just a bright grin like, oh, there you are! Like no matter what the conversation is about, his thoughts are with Jensen instead, and he can’t wait to get back.
And that moment - when Jensen’s stomach does a little flip and something warm spreads through his chest - that’s when he realizes that he’s been wanting this for a while. A lot longer than he’s let himself admit.
And given the way that Jensen doesn’t do serious relationships - like, ever - it’s kind of scary to realize that he actually wants to date Jared. Date Jared. Like, spend time with him and cuddle on couches with him and wake up early just to sleep in with him.
It’s a good thing the conversation dies out and the people wander off, because there’s no way Jensen’s coming up with any kind of intelligent remarks, not while he’s having a total existential crisis. Jesus, he doesn’t do this. It’s not him. But then there’s the last two hours that he’s spent happily playing boyfriends with Jared, which are undeniable proof that he obviously does do this. And likes it.
Fuck. What the hell is he supposed to do?
*
It takes ten minutes of serious thinking (and watching the zamboni make hypnotizing circles around the ice, because Jensen can’t make these kinds of decisions while staring at the wall) before Jensen comes up with some kind of answer. He still doesn’t know what the hell he’s going to do (or what the hell is going to happen), but he does know that he’d be an idiot to not do something. It might fuck up his friendship with Jared, but it might turn out to be the best thing he’s ever done. He has to know.
It’s nothing short of terrifying, so when Jensen finally sees Jared heading his way, he steels himself to do it right away. He repeats what he’s going to say in his head so it can’t get messed up, and he’s just taking a deep breath to say hey, so, I was thinking that maybe we should give this thing a try when he notices Jared’s expression.
It’s kind of dazed, almost starstruck, like he’s been stunned silent. But he hasn’t, because as soon as he gets close enough, Jared opens his mouth and says, stunned, “I just met the man of my dreams.”
Jensen’s heart stutters painfully, but before he can even react, Jared goes on, “We both reached for the last brownie, and our hands brushed. And then I offered to let him have it, since I’ve already had a ton of food, but he said no, he’d never want to deprive someone of chocolate, then he wouldn’t be able to sleep at night. And so he said we should split it, but it turned out to have this amazing gooey melted chocolate center and it got all over both of us, and we were both licking it off our fingers and hands and trying to stop it from spilling everywhere, and then we started laughing at how ridiculous it was, and Jesus, he’s gorgeous, the best smile I’ve ever seen and bright blue eyes, and it was like this lightning bolt of chemistry zinged between us, like an instant connection. And then he helped me get cleaned up and gave me a handful of Hershey’s kisses to make up for it, and - oh my god.”
Jared finally breaks off his epic explanation, and Jensen’s relieved that he finally realized how ridiculous he sounds, but Jared only pauses for a second before he says, “Oh my god, Jensen. I let him get away.”
“What?” Jensen asks, more sharply than he intends.
“I just let him walk away. He flirted and gave me kisses and I just let him walk away without getting his number. Fuck, I didn’t even get his name!” Jared drops his head into his hands, moaning. “Shit, shit, shit. How the fuck am I going to find him now?”
“Find him?” Jensen repeats a little faintly.
“Yeah,” Jared says. “I have to find him. He’s like, the most awesome person I’ve ever met. I have to find him so that I can thank him and make out with him and propose marriage so we can spend our lives together.”
And half of that is obviously just drama on Jared’s part, but the stupid thing is, Jensen can tell he means the other half - that he’s totally serious about finding this guy and hopefully having some kind of relationship with him. And that’s just - shit. Worst timing ever.
“Do you know who he was?” Jared wants to know. “Tall, brown hair, blue eyes - well, not robin’s egg, more like grey-blue or cobalt or something, with almost a hint of green - “
“Sorry,” Jensen interrupts, before Jared can wax poetic on any more of this guy, who he’s pretty sure he already hates. “I didn’t know most of the people at this thing. Just a few people from work.”
“And you don’t know anyone at work with brown hair and bluish-greenish eyes and a perfect smile?”
Jensen bites down on the sarcastic reply he’d like to make. “No,” he says instead. “There are a lot of people at my work that could fit that description.”
“Oh,” Jared says, deflating.
Jensen kind of hopes that’s the end of the whole thing, but the whole time they’re leaving the arena, going down a million flights of stairs with the rest of the people from the game, he can feel Jared searching the crowd for any hint of his mystery guy.
And when they get to the parking garage and they’re heading for the bank of elevators to their level, Jared suddenly freezes. Up ahead, a crowd of people are moving forward to get into an arriving elevator, and Jared grabs Jensen’s arm in an iron grip and hisses, “There he is!”
He barely wastes a second after that taking off for the elevators, but even Jensen can see that he’s not going to be in time. And he also sees something else - that his karma is seriously fucked. Because the brown-haired magical-eyed perfect-smile guy Jared is chasing is indeed one of his coworkers, and Jensen recognizes him immediately as one of the department’s copy editors. A seriously cute, very nice, very single one who would be perfect for Jared.
He only has a second to think about it - about staying quiet and pretending he has no idea who Mr. Perfect is and trying to keep Jared from stalking his work, just in case - but then Jensen remembers the way Jared’s face lit up as he talked about this guy, and after a second of disbelief at the true stupidity of the universe, he gives in.
“Michael!” he yells. “Hey, Cassidy! Wait up!”
Michael stops immediately, just outside the elevator, and the doors slide closed just as Jared runs up to him. And even from thirty feet away, Jensen can see him grin when he sees Jared coming for him.
Jensen stays back as they talk, not wanting any part of it, but he can’t stop himself from watching as they pull out their phones and exchange numbers. Jared’s uncharacteristically (adorably, his brain puts in unhelpfully) shy, ducking his head and blushing at whatever Michael says, but he can’t stop grinning. When they finally part, Jensen moves forward, hoping they can get out of there, but they only get a few steps apart before Michael turns around and drags Jared into a kiss, right there in the parking garage. Jensen feels like punching something.
And then there’s more quiet talking and smiling, and by the time Jared finally gets back to where Jensen’s standing, he’s smiling so wide it looks like it hurts. Jensen just really wants to go home and forget this night ever happened.
Jared’s quiet on the cab ride home, which is weird enough, but he keeps rubbing his lips absently, like he’s remembering Michael kissing him.
“Thanks, man,” Jared says sincerely when they get to his building, bent in half as he leans into the cab. “Thanks for calling out to Michael. I’d have been kicking myself forever if I couldn’t find him.”
“No problem,” Jensen makes himself say. “Thanks for coming and helping with my boss.”
“Don’t mention it,” Jared says. “Well. I guess the night worked out for both of us, huh?”
Jensen decides his forgetting plan is definitely involving alcohol. A lot of it. “Yeah,” he says, with a weak smile. “Definitely.”
Jared grins and waves as he closes the door, and Jensen thinks that he really should have paid attention to that bad feeling he had earlier. That weird unease, that feeling like everything was going so right that something must be about to go wrong? Yeah. He definitely should have listened.
*
Part Four