just a few non cohearent thoughts
Loving comes before saving ~ from the mouth of an 8 year old regarding the white buses
Are we usually disappointed in ourselves or in other people? Are we who we are because of how God created us or is it the world around us that creates us to be that way?
Flirt to convert!?!
missionary dating !???!
someone of tangeable intelagence please explain that
St. Louis = amazing more than words will ever put in to perspective
wal mart = @#*@###*
views on submission: I'm not there yet b/c there has not been a strong christian leader who has 1.) shown intrest 2.) been strong enough to let me let them lead..... basicaly I'm to the point where I wish I had the ability to submit to a man without submitting my body (if I don't talk to you on an intamet level don't ask)..... is so much to ask for a man to 1.) say no when I can't or won't 2.) gentaly lead me rather than be aggresive?
school = too much homework not enough sleep, lack of motivation on random days
bible study = needed blessing
church = discouragement, frustration, broken and confused susan.
friends = some tension but overall family
parents = not what I had expected, my pity for them and my self
views on marrige: I'm not entierly sure God knew what he was doing when he created man and woman...... I'm not entierly sure I believe in love either..... (but that's for a latter entry)
views on theology: I'm warming up to it but honestly me puta de hombre don't get your hopes up..... I'm beging to wonder..... if any of it is true.
where I am at:
I need to be loved on and I need some cuddles n' snuggles.
I doubt my faith every day but I still talk to God/ Jesus/ Holy spirit most nights and days. I see the church and my heart breaks a few or on the right track but so many more are killing me slowly. I'm to the point where all chritians come: Is everything I've ever been taught, read, heard, seen, experinced concerning God Real? Is God Real? or did I just imagine it all? will I go to heaven like I believe or was that just something to keep me going and "good"? do I believe in salvation and redemption? are they real to me?
so days I think I'm all alone
others I feel like I was never here
God,
are you real? is salvation true? did and does redemption still happen? have I been playing church or is this all normal? I look around and I don't agree with your church, I don't see them being what I believe you have called us to be. lord I don't see you where I should and it's wearing me down, I'm not sure what to think or how to react..... I know I believe but is that belief real...... Lord help my unbelife
~beloved
Are we usually disappointed in ourselves or in other people? Are we who we are because of how God created us or is it the world around us that creates us to be that way?
Flirt to convert!?!
missionary dating !???!
someone of tangeable intelagence please explain that
St. Louis = amazing more than words will ever put in to perspective
wal mart = @#*@###*
views on submission: I'm not there yet b/c there has not been a strong christian leader who has 1.) shown intrest 2.) been strong enough to let me let them lead..... basicaly I'm to the point where I wish I had the ability to submit to a man without submitting my body (if I don't talk to you on an intamet level don't ask)..... is so much to ask for a man to 1.) say no when I can't or won't 2.) gentaly lead me rather than be aggresive?
school = too much homework not enough sleep, lack of motivation on random days
bible study = needed blessing
church = discouragement, frustration, broken and confused susan.
friends = some tension but overall family
parents = not what I had expected, my pity for them and my self
views on marrige: I'm not entierly sure God knew what he was doing when he created man and woman...... I'm not entierly sure I believe in love either..... (but that's for a latter entry)
views on theology: I'm warming up to it but honestly me puta de hombre don't get your hopes up..... I'm beging to wonder..... if any of it is true.
where I am at:
I need to be loved on and I need some cuddles n' snuggles.
I doubt my faith every day but I still talk to God/ Jesus/ Holy spirit most nights and days. I see the church and my heart breaks a few or on the right track but so many more are killing me slowly. I'm to the point where all chritians come: Is everything I've ever been taught, read, heard, seen, experinced concerning God Real? Is God Real? or did I just imagine it all? will I go to heaven like I believe or was that just something to keep me going and "good"? do I believe in salvation and redemption? are they real to me?
so days I think I'm all alone
others I feel like I was never here
God,
are you real? is salvation true? did and does redemption still happen? have I been playing church or is this all normal? I look around and I don't agree with your church, I don't see them being what I believe you have called us to be. lord I don't see you where I should and it's wearing me down, I'm not sure what to think or how to react..... I know I believe but is that belief real...... Lord help my unbelife
~beloved