(no subject)
maybe i shouldn't of said anything.I know that i have reasons to feel sad, like i used to feel but its just not there. I hope it never comes back. things are ok right now and i dont want them to change. i dont even have 1$ to spend but its ok...it really isn't i really need that job. I dont know if i got it though, i saw the man that interviewed me today and he didnt say anything about the job...dont you think if i would of got it he would of told me? I dont mean to panic but shit man...i need it. I would feel so complete if i went to school and had a job at the same time. That way I wouldnt be distracted by any faggot thats not even worth my time. That goes to all of you. maybe i see myself differently then people see me...well i think I'm beautiful and thats all that matters fuck whatever people say...they arent part of my life, this is where i say "love yourself" its the best thing you can do the only thing you can do at a time like this. I don't feel bad for myself, i never pitty myself, i do question some of the things i do but as a result to that it always pays off. EVERYTHING does happen for a reason weather is good or not...i know i know i'm probably just talking out of my mind whatever if it helps me feel better then i'll do it. ME ME ME ME i'm important i'm what matters. seeing that i'm doing good in school makes me feel alot better, i'm not sure how long its going to take me to finish honestly but as long as i'm doing its all that matters. i actually how goals in life and i'm still young its not too late to set them...i paniced at first when i was turning 20 but then i saw the much older people going to school and it made me feel so much younger. I dont know what else to say besides that i miss him i miss him so much hes sick really sick and hes so far away i cant even talk to him on the phone. I don't even know whats going to happen. BYE