boys are fucking stupid
jacob thinks we're friends.
fuck him!
just because we were forced to not be awkward because people kept always being around doesn't mean I wasn't dying to be awkward.
I am still dying to be awkward.
It is unfortunate that so much time has passed.
I would love to give him the cold shoulder.
But now, it would appear that I am the bitch
and I cannot have that.
It's like a training a dog.
It is too far past the stupidity.
He'd be confused.
He need not ever call me.
Unless he's doing me a favor.
He need not ever IM me to talk idly.
I am not here for his amusement.
To hell with him.
If I cared less I would block him on AIM.
But I have settled for merely removing him from my buddy list
for the second time.
Yeah.
Hopefully this time I'll be more successful.
Damn him. I hate that I care.
"The opposite of hate is not love but indifference." S. Freud
I am not in the same town as indifference.
But what did Stars say?
There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save
except, i might be sorry there's nothing left to save.
because there probably is something to salvage.
but I know that I shouldn't want him.
So I pretend that I don't want in place of actually not wanting him.
it's been working out swell.
|eyes.roll|
He's more annoying than beesen.
he encroaches in my personal realm showing up places that were supposed to be mine.
|givesth.efinger|
_______________________________
one of my latest favorite songs:
I'm an engine driver
On a long run, on a long run
Would I were beside her
She's a long one, such a long one
And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go
I'm a county lineman
On the high line, on the high line
So will be my grandson
There are powerlines in our bloodlines
And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go
And I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
My bones
My bones
I'm a money lender
I have fortunes upon fortunes
Take my hand for tender
I am tortured, ever tortured
And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go
And I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
I am a writer, I am all that you have hoped on
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
My bones
My bones
(And if you don't love me let me go)
And if you don't love me let me go
(And if you don't love me let me go)
And if you don't love me let me go
thedecemberists.theenginedriver
_____________________________
*Love is…
recognition of truth.
fuck him!
just because we were forced to not be awkward because people kept always being around doesn't mean I wasn't dying to be awkward.
I am still dying to be awkward.
It is unfortunate that so much time has passed.
I would love to give him the cold shoulder.
But now, it would appear that I am the bitch
and I cannot have that.
It's like a training a dog.
It is too far past the stupidity.
He'd be confused.
He need not ever call me.
Unless he's doing me a favor.
He need not ever IM me to talk idly.
I am not here for his amusement.
To hell with him.
If I cared less I would block him on AIM.
But I have settled for merely removing him from my buddy list
for the second time.
Yeah.
Hopefully this time I'll be more successful.
Damn him. I hate that I care.
"The opposite of hate is not love but indifference." S. Freud
I am not in the same town as indifference.
But what did Stars say?
There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save
except, i might be sorry there's nothing left to save.
because there probably is something to salvage.
but I know that I shouldn't want him.
So I pretend that I don't want in place of actually not wanting him.
it's been working out swell.
|eyes.roll|
He's more annoying than beesen.
he encroaches in my personal realm showing up places that were supposed to be mine.
|givesth.efinger|
_______________________________
one of my latest favorite songs:
I'm an engine driver
On a long run, on a long run
Would I were beside her
She's a long one, such a long one
And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go
I'm a county lineman
On the high line, on the high line
So will be my grandson
There are powerlines in our bloodlines
And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go
And I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
My bones
My bones
I'm a money lender
I have fortunes upon fortunes
Take my hand for tender
I am tortured, ever tortured
And if you don't love me let me go
And if you don't love me let me go
And I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
I am a writer, I am all that you have hoped on
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones
My bones
My bones
(And if you don't love me let me go)
And if you don't love me let me go
(And if you don't love me let me go)
And if you don't love me let me go
thedecemberists.theenginedriver
_____________________________
*Love is…
recognition of truth.