Wedding announcements....advice? comments?

[bella9802]

I posted this on a wedding plans board...and got a lot of opinions...but now I'm interested to see what you all think....especially since you all know me and most know my family.... (for those of you on wedding plans too...this is exactly the same

Comments

[theladycroom]

Wedding announcements arre not construed by any reasonable person as asking for presents. Wedding invitations can be, but I think fewer and fewer people see them as such these days.

As with most things involving in-laws, this should not be your battle to wage. It's Mark's family, and he needs to deal with it, either by getting the addresses from someone else in the family, or by making the call to just not send them to his relatives. Either way, he's the one that will have to live with the consequences, and should have to explain to his family why they didn't receive an announcement about your wedding. If I were him, my response to any queries would be "My mother thought it wouldn't be proper to share our joyous news because some people might think we were looking for gifts, when really all we wanted to do was share our exciting news. I hope you'll be happy for us, nonetheless."

[bella9802]

I love that response! :)

Mark's response was just "my mother is weird...don't listen to her." And his sister ended up emailing us the address.

Ah...dealing with inlaws! This should be fun! :)

[notthatandy]

Any chance a simple "Gifts aren't necessary, but if you feel like doing something, please donate to *insert favorite charity here*"?

[bella9802]

I'm not sure....as much as I feel that would be an absolutely appropriate comment...I'm concerned now that the mere mention of gifts again puts the emphasis on the gift. Ug.

[elle_jefe]

I would suggest not even mentioning gifts, as that would imply that gifts would otherwise be expected. And NO, WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENTS ARE NOT EVEN REMOTATELY A MEANS OF SOLICITING GIFTS. They're a polite way of saying, "We didn't invite you to the wedding itself, because we wanted to keep it intimate, but you still matter to us, so we want to share the joy of the moment with you in a smaller way. And this way, you don't have to shell out money for a hotel or presents!" :)

[carolinabby]

I think since you are not including any registry link, etc, that lessens the need for someone to feel like they need to get gifts. If you had included that, it would be different. But what a strange attitude for his mom to have . . . How does she feel about you having an intimate ceremony?

Cards

[anonymous]

Congrats on your big day - I recently used Send Out Cards to mail out some "We Moved" cards - my be a good system to send thanks you after your wedding, you could upload a picture from your wedding and have them printed on every thank you. Best of luck to you.