These are, I think, very healthy guidelines for a relationship. I wish I could say I had the fortitude to break off every relationship that did not align with them, but while I'm willing to make the big, extremely necessary breaks in spite of social/societal pressure (father, sister, various other family members) it's much harder for me to part from certain other people in spite of wishing to hold the same sort of guidelines. Sometimes I suppose I'm eternally hopeful that someone will improve, regardless of how unlikely it is. Though I'm working on distancing myself from those relationships, and recognizing how some people don't actively wish to change.
Every time I see that you've posted an entry (I'm notified via email), I rush right over to read it if I'm able to. And this is why. I loved reading this; a person's needs and boundaries say so much about them. And to be honest, we share a good number of these!!
Basically, we're very similar in what we want to avoid in a relationship. All five of those are what lead me to make my decisions, and #1 and #5 often go hand-in-hand and are probably the least tolerable for me.
It's so wonderful to hear that you hold yourself to your own standards. So many people don't. We're all prone to slip up, but if you have a habit of being, say, disrespectful then get upset when someone disrespects you... well, maybe you should start applying your ideal moral code (as you've called it) to yourself. I definitely feel you do work to achieve and avoid the things you've listed here.... which is pleasant. I really enjoy your entries, and I'm so happy I actually had a moment today to comment - twice, even though LJ ate my first one! <3
Comments 11
I absolutely loved this entire post, but this especially resonated with me~! :)
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Basically, we're very similar in what we want to avoid in a relationship. All five of those are what lead me to make my decisions, and #1 and #5 often go hand-in-hand and are probably the least tolerable for me.
It's so wonderful to hear that you hold yourself to your own standards. So many people don't. We're all prone to slip up, but if you have a habit of being, say, disrespectful then get upset when someone disrespects you... well, maybe you should start applying your ideal moral code (as you've called it) to yourself. I definitely feel you do work to achieve and avoid the things you've listed here.... which is pleasant. I really enjoy your entries, and I'm so happy I actually had a moment today to comment - twice, even though LJ ate my first one! <3
Reply
Leave a comment