w00t
Dad is away, Mum went crazy and threw me out of the house last night. He demanded I stay in our backyard with Claude so when Dad comes home he can deal with me. Apparently, sleeping with Voronwe and this sexy little vixen ticked him off.
Claude is strange. His my Little Pony tent smells girly and he does yoga everynight at midnight. There are pictures of my mum taped everywhere and he screamed like a pansy when my little chinchilla escaped my coat pockets. Poor Anton LaVey :(
Broosh came by to give me real food since Claude only has this tofu shit. Anton ran up her skirt, so I tried to get him out and she smacked me and told me I could starve. My family sucks. Zak's been shooting me with a pellet gun whenever I try to take a bath with a hose. Claude's offered to wash me, I declined. He's a dirty, dirty man... which is Ok, I just don't want him to touch me and pretend I'm my mum.
So, I am now a dartboard for Jade :) She's paying me in pizza flavored goldfish and some money. Life is good. Only not because if it were I wouldn't be in a tent with a psycho waiting for my Dad to get home and yell at me.
Still, I'm sexy and I will have pizza flavored goldfish. Mmmm.
Claude is strange. His my Little Pony tent smells girly and he does yoga everynight at midnight. There are pictures of my mum taped everywhere and he screamed like a pansy when my little chinchilla escaped my coat pockets. Poor Anton LaVey :(
Broosh came by to give me real food since Claude only has this tofu shit. Anton ran up her skirt, so I tried to get him out and she smacked me and told me I could starve. My family sucks. Zak's been shooting me with a pellet gun whenever I try to take a bath with a hose. Claude's offered to wash me, I declined. He's a dirty, dirty man... which is Ok, I just don't want him to touch me and pretend I'm my mum.
So, I am now a dartboard for Jade :) She's paying me in pizza flavored goldfish and some money. Life is good. Only not because if it were I wouldn't be in a tent with a psycho waiting for my Dad to get home and yell at me.
Still, I'm sexy and I will have pizza flavored goldfish. Mmmm.