The most important label is the one you give yourself.
I was thinking about this post that tatjna did about the labels that other people give you, and came to the conclusion in the title of this post.
See, it really doesn't matter how other people label you. What matters is how or if you label yourself. The only time I've run into problems with other people's labels is when they then make assumptions about me, then act as though those assumptions were true. Which they generally aren't.
This leads me to another thing.
I see the words "gay", "lesbian", "straight", "bisexual" etc as more labels. As in, it's not just who you sleep with; it's not just who you're attracted to; it's how you see yourself. Which is why it really annoys me when people say to me that "gay people can't have children". Of course they can. Homosexuality doesn't make you sterile. All you need is an egg and some sperm. It really doesn't matter what label either of the parents claim.
Yes, you need a man and a woman to make a child. But neither of them have to identify as straight.
And the other argument that comes up is that "same-sex parents aren't real families, because their genes aren't passed on". This is obviously rubbish. If a child is born to a lesbian couple, then it will have its mother's genes. Duh. If two gay men decide to have a child, and find a suitable surrogate mother, then (presumably) the child would have its father's genes.
And what does this say about blended families and adoptions? I have a step-father and a step-brother. They're not related to me by blood, but that doesn't make them any less of a family to me. "Parent" is just as much a label as any other.
So these are my thoughts on the matter. Some of you might think they are controversial. All that matters to me is that they are mine. If I've made you think, then so much the better.
See, it really doesn't matter how other people label you. What matters is how or if you label yourself. The only time I've run into problems with other people's labels is when they then make assumptions about me, then act as though those assumptions were true. Which they generally aren't.
This leads me to another thing.
I see the words "gay", "lesbian", "straight", "bisexual" etc as more labels. As in, it's not just who you sleep with; it's not just who you're attracted to; it's how you see yourself. Which is why it really annoys me when people say to me that "gay people can't have children". Of course they can. Homosexuality doesn't make you sterile. All you need is an egg and some sperm. It really doesn't matter what label either of the parents claim.
Yes, you need a man and a woman to make a child. But neither of them have to identify as straight.
And the other argument that comes up is that "same-sex parents aren't real families, because their genes aren't passed on". This is obviously rubbish. If a child is born to a lesbian couple, then it will have its mother's genes. Duh. If two gay men decide to have a child, and find a suitable surrogate mother, then (presumably) the child would have its father's genes.
And what does this say about blended families and adoptions? I have a step-father and a step-brother. They're not related to me by blood, but that doesn't make them any less of a family to me. "Parent" is just as much a label as any other.
So these are my thoughts on the matter. Some of you might think they are controversial. All that matters to me is that they are mine. If I've made you think, then so much the better.