(no subject)

[becauseshecan]

I'm a huge quote whore. Really, truly, and when my computer was wiped I lost my huge doc that had all of my favorites. Anyway tonight I found my Dorothy Parker Book (Yay!) And I fell in love with her all over again. Here are some things she said:

"The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue."
- Dorothy Parker

"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to."
- Dorothy Parker

"His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets."
- Dorothy Parker

"I wish I could drink like a lady.
I can take one or two at the most.
Three and I'm under the table.
Four and I'm under the host."
- Dorothy Parker

"I'd like to have money. And I'd like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that's too adorable, I'd rather have money."
- Dorothy Parker

Salary is no object:
I want only enough to keep body and soul apart
- Dorothy Parker

His ignorance was an Empire State Building of ignorance. You had to admire it for its size.
- Dorothy Parker

“Razors pain you
Rivers are damp
Acids stain you
And drugs cause cramp.

Guns aren't lawful
Nooses give
Gas smells awful
You might as well live.”

-Dorothy Parker

“By the time you swear you are his, shivering and sighing, And he vows his passion is infinite and undying- Lady, make a note of this: One of you is lying”
Dorothy Parker