Its been a while...
"Have you ever wondered which hurts the most? Saying something and wishing you hadn't? or saying nothing and wishing you had? I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say..."
Its been soo long since my last entry, and i'm sure no one is even reading this but i felt like updating anways. The quote above is really true, i think about things like that a lot, or just that in general i remember having a conversation with monique about something like it it one day. I dont remember exactly the topic, but it was on the lines of that.I think saying nothing and wishing you had is worse, but idk... Not saying anything at all is obviously the safer choice, that way you can't get rejected or made to feel stupid, but when you dont say anything at all your are only hurting yourself. The most important things in life ARE the hardest things to say, which is why they are often left unsaid. But i guess the more I think about it fear is a wasted emotion, and not going after what you want is just stupid. So even if you do say something and wish you hadn't, that wishing im sure is a lot easier than wanting to say something to bad..and just not being able to.
So the new year came, 2004 gone..and thats okay, it really wasn't that great anyway. I mean yes i had good times, but its not like there was anything that i was like WOW this is the best year ever. Maybe 2005 will be better, but i'm not setting my hopes too high cause i tend to find my dreams never live up to what actually happens. And its wierd, cause when i think about it im like that persons life is soo much better than more, or they seem like they have soo much more fun, but i'm sure everyone always wishes at times they were someone else. And sometimes well i'm really like upset or w/e i think like am i the only one in the world who feels this way..and i'm sooo sure i'm not, but sometimes its easy to just feel so alone. And idk if anyone else feels this way, but its easier to be depressed all the time, or act like you dont care..because that way you wont get hurt. When your happy, or care too much about people you let your guard down, and its easy to get trampled on. Idk tho, just a few things i've been thinking about lately. I wont go on too much more.....and besides i dont even think anyone will read this, because i haven't used lj in like 9 months.
Its been soo long since my last entry, and i'm sure no one is even reading this but i felt like updating anways. The quote above is really true, i think about things like that a lot, or just that in general i remember having a conversation with monique about something like it it one day. I dont remember exactly the topic, but it was on the lines of that.I think saying nothing and wishing you had is worse, but idk... Not saying anything at all is obviously the safer choice, that way you can't get rejected or made to feel stupid, but when you dont say anything at all your are only hurting yourself. The most important things in life ARE the hardest things to say, which is why they are often left unsaid. But i guess the more I think about it fear is a wasted emotion, and not going after what you want is just stupid. So even if you do say something and wish you hadn't, that wishing im sure is a lot easier than wanting to say something to bad..and just not being able to.
So the new year came, 2004 gone..and thats okay, it really wasn't that great anyway. I mean yes i had good times, but its not like there was anything that i was like WOW this is the best year ever. Maybe 2005 will be better, but i'm not setting my hopes too high cause i tend to find my dreams never live up to what actually happens. And its wierd, cause when i think about it im like that persons life is soo much better than more, or they seem like they have soo much more fun, but i'm sure everyone always wishes at times they were someone else. And sometimes well i'm really like upset or w/e i think like am i the only one in the world who feels this way..and i'm sooo sure i'm not, but sometimes its easy to just feel so alone. And idk if anyone else feels this way, but its easier to be depressed all the time, or act like you dont care..because that way you wont get hurt. When your happy, or care too much about people you let your guard down, and its easy to get trampled on. Idk tho, just a few things i've been thinking about lately. I wont go on too much more.....and besides i dont even think anyone will read this, because i haven't used lj in like 9 months.