Facing the unknown
It has finally settled in that I am unemployed. The novelty has worn off, and though I am trusting in God to deliver me from this situation, my heart is scared. I have sour stomach I'm so scared! It's one thing to leave a job with lots of savings in tow or another job offer. But I left my job without either two, and it's scary. The enemy keeps telling me that I will fail and that I will need to pack up and go back to California if something doesn't come through soon. But I know God wouldn't have me step out in faith to fall off the cliff of my life. There is just no way.
I had 2 interviews yesterday. One, working as an executive receptionist and assistant, went really well. I was supposed to hear something by yesterday afternoon or early today, and it's still early so I shouldn't worry. I just hate being disappointed, but I felt such and emotional connection to the people I interviewed with and I really want this job. But I realize that it's in God's hands, and that he will open the doors where he sees fit. Waiting is the hardest part of it all. Waiting and not knowing is what gets to me.
Today in my bible meditation I read from Philippians 3 and 4, and I happened to stumble upon a few verses that really spoke to me about where I am currently in my life. The most prominent of these was Philippians 4:6, "Do not be anxious about anything but in prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God." It's all I can do, nothing more. Worrying and being stressed aren't going to help things move faster and it won't help me get the answers I want any faster. All I can do is pray and make my needs/ requests known to God and I have to trust that he will handle it for me. It's just scary... facing the unknown with so much at risk is scary, but I have to walk this out in faith and know that I am all right and it is all taken care of.
Yesterday I got sorta upset about this guy, because in my mind if someone tells you they like you and you tell them back that you like them then why aren't you calling??? I made it a rule not to call him and I just submitted this to God, that I would love to be a part of this man's life and to be one of the few people who encourage him to be his best, but God's will will be done. Period. Still, I like him more than I’m truly comfortable with and I just got a little emotional thinking he may have passed me up for that old Puerto Rican grandma he used to be with. Ick. My head tells me that he does not have the qualities I need in a man, but again my heart says something different. One good thing about not working there is that I can't flirt with him all day... I have to actually be productive now.
Just keep me in your prayers as I wait to hear back about this job and continue to interview. Pray that God opens a door soon and that in the mean time I have the peace I need to live gloriously.
I had 2 interviews yesterday. One, working as an executive receptionist and assistant, went really well. I was supposed to hear something by yesterday afternoon or early today, and it's still early so I shouldn't worry. I just hate being disappointed, but I felt such and emotional connection to the people I interviewed with and I really want this job. But I realize that it's in God's hands, and that he will open the doors where he sees fit. Waiting is the hardest part of it all. Waiting and not knowing is what gets to me.
Today in my bible meditation I read from Philippians 3 and 4, and I happened to stumble upon a few verses that really spoke to me about where I am currently in my life. The most prominent of these was Philippians 4:6, "Do not be anxious about anything but in prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God." It's all I can do, nothing more. Worrying and being stressed aren't going to help things move faster and it won't help me get the answers I want any faster. All I can do is pray and make my needs/ requests known to God and I have to trust that he will handle it for me. It's just scary... facing the unknown with so much at risk is scary, but I have to walk this out in faith and know that I am all right and it is all taken care of.
Yesterday I got sorta upset about this guy, because in my mind if someone tells you they like you and you tell them back that you like them then why aren't you calling??? I made it a rule not to call him and I just submitted this to God, that I would love to be a part of this man's life and to be one of the few people who encourage him to be his best, but God's will will be done. Period. Still, I like him more than I’m truly comfortable with and I just got a little emotional thinking he may have passed me up for that old Puerto Rican grandma he used to be with. Ick. My head tells me that he does not have the qualities I need in a man, but again my heart says something different. One good thing about not working there is that I can't flirt with him all day... I have to actually be productive now.
Just keep me in your prayers as I wait to hear back about this job and continue to interview. Pray that God opens a door soon and that in the mean time I have the peace I need to live gloriously.