Ericka. You are depressed, and you are not in a good position to be making major life decisions. The "I've ceased to really want anything in life" gives it away. You need to look into meds and therapy, and into seeking out some counseling on the immigration issue. I don't know whether you can stick it out in this job or not; it sounds like you are dealing with more stress than you can handle, but it's possible that help with the other areas would make it possible for you to stick out the two months in that job until business gets less.
As for the Cam, I haven't been around much in the last year, so maybe things have changed, but I don't recall ever having the sense that you were simply tolerated rather than genuinely liked.
Want to grab lunch sometime? I think you need to talk with someone, and I'd like to talk with you.
Part of me wishes I could see someone. But my student health insurance ran up August 31st and I don't qualify for OHIP for 6-9 months. So... no doctors for anything for me. Just like being back home in the US, no way to see a doctor unless I'm dying. So I muscle through it.
We'll see about lunch. I'm looking at 50-60 hour work weeks for all of Sept and October, so... not much time left for anything that isn't work, and simple exhaustion on the times I'm off.
OK, I get the exhaustion thing. What if I just come over and help you out with whatever stuff around your apartment you're too tired to deal with? That way you don't even have to worry about making it look civilized for company, because I'll take care of that once I'm there.
If you want more info on depression, here's info from the Mayo Clinic. I went through a pretty heavy depression in my first year of university, so I can relate. I've contacted 211 Toronto about free/sliding scale psychotherapy for someone who does not qualify for OHIP. I hope there are options out there for you. *hug*
All I can say is that, from our experiences with each other, is that I think you're a worthy person, that I'm happy to be your friend, and that I hope it works out for you. If there's anything I can do to help, just ask.
Yeah, I think it would too. Sadly, I barely qualify for a landed immigration even -if- I somehow manage to survive this year at work. I just don't think there is any viable way for me to stay in Canada, no matter how hard I try. Hence me thinking why should I be trying at all?
Hey. i read this. i care. i don't know what good that does you, but i think Christine's probably onto something. And i'm around most nights if you ever want to chat.
Yeah. This is the first time in my life I've ever really thought "wow, I do want to see someone. I want -something-...anything, to make me stop feeling like this."
But, I have no health insurance and sure as hell can't afford it. So...I'll get through. No other choice. I always do.
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As for the Cam, I haven't been around much in the last year, so maybe things have changed, but I don't recall ever having the sense that you were simply tolerated rather than genuinely liked.
Want to grab lunch sometime? I think you need to talk with someone, and I'd like to talk with you.
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We'll see about lunch. I'm looking at 50-60 hour work weeks for all of Sept and October, so... not much time left for anything that isn't work, and simple exhaustion on the times I'm off.
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If you want more info on depression, here's info from the Mayo Clinic. I went through a pretty heavy depression in my first year of university, so I can relate. I've contacted 211 Toronto about free/sliding scale psychotherapy for someone who does not qualify for OHIP. I hope there are options out there for you. *hug*
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But, I have no health insurance and sure as hell can't afford it. So...I'll get through. No other choice. I always do.
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