She Loves You?
Title: She Loves You? PART 12
Author: macca44552
Pairing: J/P, G/OC, P/OC
Rating: NC-17
Summary: A naive fan, thinking that she is going to win the heart of Paul McCartney, walks into something quite odd...
A/N: There’s some stuff about religion in this one. It is just fiction. It doesn’t reflect my personal views. For the most part, everything is historically accurate. I plan to keep it that way, unless I find the need to make changes.
Disclaimer: Everything you heard is a lie: I don’t own The Beatles.
Part 1 Part 6 Part 11
Part 2 Part 7
Part 3 Part 8
Part 4 Part 9
Part 5 Part 10
Forty minutes, that’s all it took. Forty minutes after taking LSD and things started to get a little fucking weird.
First of all, I felt happy…euphoric even. My insides were tingling and I wasn’t just giggling--I was fucking going through patches of hysterical laughter. A rainbow traveled over our skulls and we became known as the “Treasure Force”. John was the leader of the TF with Ringo second in command. George, Jim, and I were the investigators. Our mission? To eliminate all suspicious behavior. We did not want any traitors on our rainbow island.
“Ringo, do you hear that?” John asked as he looked around the mansion dramatically. We all followed his lead.
“Nah. What’d ya hear cap’m?” he asked.
John’s eyes exploded. Literally.
“OH MY GOD! WHAT THE FUCK!!!?” I screamed as I pointed at John’s face.
“Shh! I think I hear a traitor in the midst! Follow me!” John whispered.
As he was whispering, his eyes slowly regenerated. Thankfully! Holy shit, that was disgusting!
I followed the other members of the TF through a mansion that was slowly spiraling. We passed by the other Byrd members and party guests who were smoking pot around a throng of dandelions. I laughed.
“Here it is! The lair of the traitor!” John declared.
George and Jim starting laughing with excitement.
“Let’s plunge ahead,” Jim said.
John opened the door we were all crowded against. The door hinges made a high-pitched screeching sound that left us all tightly covering our ears. When we looked inside the lair, we saw the traitor, Paul.
“Ah! Look what we’ve got here!” John said as we all entered Paul’s den. George closed the door behind us.
Paul was sitting on the bed with his guitar perched upon his lap. His normally perfect hair was now standing straight on-end, and his eyebrows looked like pine needles. I laughed.
“Paul! What have you been doing with your hair?” I asked, shaking with laughter. Paul rolled his eyes.
“Do you guys mind leaving? I’m sort of working on something,” Paul asked, trying his best to keep his annoyance at bay. John sniggered.
“No, you see, we are the Treasure Force. That means we have to get rid of any traitors!” he explained with a dull expression. Paul took the guitar off his lap.
“Let me guess, I’m a traitor?” he asked with disinterest.
Ringo nodded.
“Why? Because I didn’t take any of yer mind-fucking drugs?” Paul spit.
“It’s the way it is,” I said.
Paul crossed his pine needles. He had a unibrow. The pine needles were making love. They sprouted a great tree that extended into his hair.
“Stop staring at me like that!” Paul demanded as he stood and made to walk out of his room. John stepped in front of him.
“Sorry, mate. But the TF has got to dispose of ya!” he said.
“Yep! Let’s get to it members!” Ringo yelled.
Immediately, we all crowded around Paul and started dancing. I was jumping in circles while throwing my arms from side-to-side as if I were at a concert. Jim assumed a hunched-back position while kicking his legs out in front of him. George started doing that weird little leg-springy dance that he does on stage, and John pretended to be some retarded person by doing very spastic body movements. Ringo seemed to be the only one who knew how to dance and he fancied himself by doing the twist.
Paul did not look pleased. His arms were crossed over his chest and his jaw was set in a tight line that rivaled John’s.
In a split second, George fell into Ringo who fell into Jim, who grabbed me to try and stabilize himself, but it didn’t work, so I ended up falling into John, who fell to the floor.
“Fuck, George! Why do you always fall?” I said as I rubbed my head. He looked over at me with puppy dog brown eyes, locks of brown hair swaying over his forehead, and two pairs of perfect eyebrows. Damn! The LSD is good! I had to bite my lip to keep from pouncing on him.
“Eh, sod off,” he said apathetically.
Everyone looked around and started laughing at their “grounded” state.
“The Treasure Force sucks!” Jim gasped between laughs.
We collapsed on top of each other in a giggling mess. Paul hastily stepped over us and left the room with anger and annoyance beaming off of his clothes.
“Wait!” John yelled as he held his hand up to still our outbreak.
“What?” Jim asked.
“I hear something,” he whispered as he crouched down and put his ear to the floorboards. He smiled.
“Yes! I hear them! They’re in there!” he declared as he sat up and started pounding on the floor. Everyone followed his lead, and soon we were all banging on the floor, trying to scare away a creature that John called “The Catnishpull”.
“John…er…what exactly is a Catnishpull?” I asked.
He looked at me like I was an idiot.
“A Catnishpull is an animal with the head of a cat, a body that is similar looking to a Danish, and an ass that juts out like a pulley,” he explained as if it were the simplest thing in the world.
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure that doesn’t exist,” I countered. He fixed me with a flat expression.
“Just because you haven’t seen it, doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist. I mean, if it’s in our heads, why can’t it be real?”
That was the first time that I saw the philosophical side of John.
And we were on fucking acid.
After knocking on the wood for a couple of minutes and going on a couple of more adventures, the Treasure Force disbanded. After all, LSD is not a social drug. Meaning to be alone, John wandered off and sat in a corner somewhere. Unfortunately, he didn’t get much alone time because Peter Fonda, a slightly attractive actor, kept bugging him. I overheard him telling John that he knew what it was like to be dead. As soon as I heard that, the skin on his face started to crumple and peel away like a bad suntan.
George went into his room while Jim and Ringo tried their best to entertain the remaining party guests.
I sat on the couch and stared at a painting that was across from me. It was a picture of the sun shining out on a bright green field. The weeds started moving back and forth, dancing in the star’s warmth. The rays extended their golden hands to the plants and they spun around in a brilliant glow of colors. Magenta painted a figure that emerged to be a platypus with a top hat. The other figure descended onto the field like a screw drills into a piece of wood. Spinning the flames of the green valley came a porcelain doll. Golden locks cascaded down her shoulders as her purple eyes connected with those of the platypus. The creature shied away from her torturously appealing gaze and sauntered off into the distance.
She followed.
The onion sweet patches parted for her as she followed the platypus. Beady eyes looked back to the strange follower, and became amused at her expression. The beauty looked at him with a powerful longing that begged for reciprocation.
He ran anyway.
Onto the ray, he climbed to enter the sun’s chamber. The porcelain doll still followed him, she would go to great ends for his companionship, but the platypus was confused. He didn’t know what she wanted. Was she just playing a game?
“Go to her, you queer!” I shouted at the painting.
A couple of party guests looked at me like I was crazy, but when Ringo explained something to them in hushed tones, they nodded with understanding.
I looked back at the painting to see the porcelain beauty and the platypus standing together with gold and silver beams orbiting around them. The beams reflected off a marvelous blue tree trunk and formed a shape above the pair.
A heart.
My eyes rocketed open! I found my purpose!
I quickly stood and left the party area to retire to my room. I needed time to think. I was feeling empty because without the intent to split up John and Paul, I lost all the purpose that fueled my being since the beginning of the tour. But now, thanks to LSD, I have found my purpose again!
“I’m going to get John and Paul to admit their love for each other!” I declared to the mouse wearing a raincoat. I was going to make them the happiest queers alive!
* * *
I woke up the next morning fully expecting to have the worst headache ever. Instead, I awoke to a pleasant feeling spreading throughout my body. Sitting up and looking around at all of my possessions, I was glad to find that I wasn’t seeing any more mice in raincoats, or any other trippy images of the like. I can’t wait until I tell Lenny about what happened last night! I might want to hold off on telling Steve, though.
I stretched my limbs and got dressed quickly. Once I left my room, I peddled down the stairs and looked around for any signs of life in the quiet house.
Nothing.
Empty glasses of alcohol and trash littered the floor. A couple of valuables laid in shattered ruins and discarded clothing items were in each corner of the room.
“Well this is pretty,” I commented.
Suddenly, I heard a small noise from upstairs. Turning around, I went up to investigate the small sound.
When I came across a bend in the hallway, I saw John curled up on the floor, staring off into space. He looked up at me when he sensed my presence, but he didn’t utter a word. He looked lost.
“You okay?” I asked quietly. He made a small noise in his throat.
“Do ya know what time it is?” he asked. I shook my head.
“Figures. It’s five o’clock in the afternoon,” he informed me.
My mouth dropped.
“Five o’clock?! Really?”
“Mmmhmm. That shit lasts fer a long time. It’s worth it, though,” he said as he pulled out a cigarette and started twisting it between his calloused fingers.
“Wow. I…uh…fell asleep during the trip, I think,” I said.
He looked up at me.
“You fell asleep? Must’ve been a boring a trip. I was awake all night.”
I shifted uncomfortably.
“Oh. Maybe I was awake and I just thought I was dreaming or something,” I tried.
He put the cigarette between his lips and lit it with a match and swift fingers. I watched him cautiously. I didn’t know if he was still pissed at me for kissing Paul, so my nerves were on edge.
‘Would you sit the fuck down already!? Bloody hell, do you always just stand around like a moron?” he snapped.
“Do you always sit around and stare at the wall like a moron?” I countered as I sat down on the uncomfortable ground. He laughed.
“Smoke?” he asked as he held out his cigarette. I waved him off.
“Good. Wasn’t gonna give it to you anyway,” he joked. I let out a deep breath.
“So, how was your trip?” I asked. A smile erupted on his face.
“Brilliant, you know. I can’t believe we joined some Treasure Force bullshit! I must’ve looked like the biggest fairy on earth!” he laughed. I giggled along with him.
“Yeah, and we went along dancing in front of all the guests!” I laughed at the memory.
“Oh well, at least they got quality entertainment. Not even German prostitutes could outshine our moves,” he said. I rolled my eyes.
“I don’t think Paul found it very entertaining,” I added.
To that, John tilted his head back and started laughing like a hyena.
“Are you kidding? Paulie was deeply impressed by our dancing arrangement.”
I shook my head.
“Yeah, I’m sure he enjoyed watching all of us having a good time and rubbing it in his face.”
“Eh, shut up. If Paul wanted ta have fun, he would’ve taken the LSD. Instead, he took a knife, butchered his testes, and wanked off the rest of the night with Eppy,” he stated.
“But it still wasn’t nice t-”
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that I was talking to the queen of niceties. Tell me, is calling Eleanor Bron a mediocre actress what nice people do?” he countered.
Silence.
“Thought so. Although, I must admit that what you said was bloody fantastic!”
I laughed, thankful that he wasn’t mad at my little encounter with Eleanor.
“I could care less that I made Macca feel left out. That’s what he gets, you know. He went against us, so obviously he would be out of our loop,” he finished.
I chose not to argue with him about how he treated Paul last night. After all, I wanted to get on good terms with him, and disagreeing with John Lennon was not the way to his friendship. I dropped it.
“So how was your trip after the Treasure Force broke up?” I asked.
His eyes lost the Lennon luster as he stared off into the distance.
“I met myself,” he said quietly. I raised my eyebrows.
“You met yourself?” I asked in disbelief.
“Yeah. He was older, you know. Had a big gray beard and a bowler hat. He told me things.”
“What things?”
John looked at me with a feeble smile.
“Sorry, luv. If ya want to know the rest you’ll have ta deposit ten cents!”
I rolled my eyes with a laugh.
“What things?” I repeated.
He let out a deep sigh.
“That I’m not doing what I’m supposed to be doing. That I’m meant to do, to be someone else. That what I’m doing now isn’t right,” he said with the same lost look. My heart stopped.
“You mean with The Beatles?” I asked hurriedly. He put his hands up.
“Don’t keel over now, I just bought these pants,” he joked.
I swallowed repeatedly. He looked at me and shrugged his shoulders.
“I don’t know. I really don’t. But I’ll figure it out. I’ll find my place. Everyone does you know? I just hope I find it before I die!” he ended with a joke. I smiled.
“Don’t worry, you will. Plus, you have plenty of time! You’re not dead yet!”
“You never know! I could die tomorrow,” he said as he pointed a finger at me. I shook my head.
“No you’re going to live until you become one of those cripples that you make fun of so much!”
“That old? I don’t know about that!”
“Oh yeah, you’re going to be an old geezer,” I joked. For the first time, I actually felt comfortable around John. It was nice.
“An old geezer, eh? That could work, I could go around beating up little children with my cane and going on about the war,” he joked while holding an invisible cane and whacking equally invisible children. I entered a fit of laughter.
“I can’t wait to hear about that on the news!” I proclaimed. He laughed for a little while before staring off into the distance. Something was bothering him about the trip he experienced, but I knew that he wouldn’t confide in me about it. It doesn’t matter. If everything goes as planned, when John and Paul express their love for one another, John will have the opportunity to confide in Paul all of his little mind problems. Good luck, Paul!
“Well, I’m going to eat. I’m starving. Are you coming?” I asked, even though I knew the answer.
“Nah. I’m gonna look at the wall some more.”
I spun on my heel and started walking away.
“Kara!” he shouted.
I turned around and gave his form a questioning look.
“You can have yer truce flag,” he said quietly. My eyebrows crawled up my forehead as my mouth fell open.
“Really?” I asked, my body filling with giddiness. He nodded.
“Sure. But yer still gonna get some payback fer the kissing shit you pulled with Paulie! I always keep my word!” he said with an evil smile. I gulped audibly before leaving John to his thoughts. I have John! He’s on my side! Whoo! All I need is Paul, and then I can start being a bitch to George again! Yes!
I didn’t even care that John was going to enact a final bit of revenge on me for kissing Paul. I mean, seriously,
what’s the worst he can do?
To be continued…
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