Vanessa Come Home Chapter 2
(A week later. Angelica is back and she and Tommy are riding up the elevator to his apartment)
Angelica: Oh, Tommy you would have loved this hotel. They had parasailing and scuba diving. You could go in a Jeep and scour cave walls for markings made by the indigenous peoples.
Tommy: Cool. What did you do?
Angelica: There was a bar in the pool. I swear, swimming any other way than drunk is just stupid. Oh, and the sunsets. Amazing. I took, like, seven rolls of film just on that. You know, let's open up a bottle of wine and I'll walk you through 'em. (Angelica pulls pictures out of her purse)
Tommy: Hey, you open the wine, I'll open the oven door and climb in.
(Tommy opens the Door and his Apartment is a Mess Vanessa passed out on Couch Tom Jones-Unusual is playing but the C.D. is Skipping)
TOM JONES: "It's not unusua-- it's not unusua-- It's not unusua-- it's not unusua-- It's not--"
(Tommy Turns off Music)
Angelica: Well, this is unusual.
Tommy: What the hell happened here?! VANESSA?!
Vanessa(Sits up suddenly) NO! Vlad Darling I didn't burn the Curtains!!
Tommy: I don't remember giving permission for a party!
Vanessa: It wasn't a party. You guys know how I'm into gangsta rap, right?
Tommy(shrugs) Sure, go on.
Angelica(rolls eyes) Yeah.
Vanessa(Sits up straightening hair) All I did was invite Ol' Dirty Bastard over to watch Masterpiece Theatre. (Shrugs) And he brought along his whole posse. And some bomb-ass chronic. Heh-heh!
Tommy: Would you look at this place? These cushions are ruined. There's beer rings all over the coffee table. This a Bigger Mess then the Incident at Casey And April's Wedding (Holds up pen) Even the Pen that survived the Reception is Broken!!
Angelica(waves hands to calm Tommy) All right, calm down.
Tommy: Hey! Don't you tell me to calm down!
Angelica(hands on hips not amused) Hey, can we please not do this in front of the C-R-A-Z-Y?
Vanessa: Can I have my Prozax now?
Tommy: No! No dessert!
Angelica: Pickles, she's hungry.
Tommy(pissed) Tough! She's gotta learn that there are consequences to her actions! (To V,) So you are gonna sit there, on this couch, and look at Angie's honeymoon pictures!
Vanessa(Childishly) I hate you!
(Angelica sits down and pulls out Pictures)
Angelica: Roll one. My luggage.
(Vanessa gasps and Lays down on side Crying)
SCENE VI: Tommy's Apartment
(Tommy Is finished with Fixing Camera when Helga Pataki walks in with Vanessa in hand, Kimi also enters)
Helga: Hey. Look what showed up on my doorstep.
Tommy: Was she in a basket with a note pinned to her that said, "Please take care of my baby. Love, Lucifer"?
Helga: We've got a problem. She needs a place to stay.
Kimi: Well, why can't she stay with you and Arnold?
Helga: Come on, we're together for the first time in 3 months. We wanna be able to have sex without someone in the background giggling.
Vanessa: Honey, I won't giggle if you don't make that face you make.
(Helga looks at V, disturbed by this Knowledge and walks over to Tommy)
Helga(quietly) Come on Pickles! Come on, she's in a really bad way. You have to take her.
Tommy(stage whisper) I don't want her.
Helga: Neither do I.
Tommy: What are we gonna do? We can't just drive her out to the country and release her back into the wild.
Kimi(walks up to them) Or can't we? Just think about it. We can lure her into a cage with a PlayGirl tied to the end of a little piece of string.
Tommy: If her friends ask, we just say, "We took her to a farm where she can run free and have waiters fired." (the 2 Minus Kimi laugh Loudly)
Kimi: Come on guys be serious serious. Where's she gonna go?
Tommy: Where did she go?
(Tommy looks around so do the girls Vanessa IS GONE!!!)
SCENE VII: A Hotel Bar
(Tommy, Kimi, Kevin 11 Gwen Levin and Ben are looking for Vanessa)
Ben(rubs forehead) This is crazy. We're not gonna find V,. She could be anywhere. She's got four fake passports and a map of the underworld.
Kimi: We've gotta keep looking for her. She's out there all alone, There are Murders Rapist's Drug Dealers. She could...hurt one of them.
Gwen(to Kevin) Maybe we should call the police.
Kevin: No. No cops.
Tommy: But she's in a emotional state. We can't find her--
(Kevin grabs Tommy by throat after Absorbing Marble Floor)
Kevin(grits Teeth) I...said..no..cops!!
(Lets go of Tommy and lets Marble slide from body as Gwen pats him on shoulder to calm down)
Kevin: I'm gonna go ask around, see if anyone's seen her. (Makes Eyes on you Motion with Fingers) Keep it on the down-low.
(Kevin Leaves)
Ben: We're gonna get a drink.
Gwen: Make it a double. We wanna catch V, we've gotta drink like her.