(no subject)
YAY, i found all the new jewelry that I am going to order when I get my rook and my tragus pierced...me = excited. w00t.
ok, the burning question from Kelly, "What did Cory and I do on Friday night?" well...to start off with....the whole story. When I walked into locos he was there and he gave me one of those hugs that just makes you wanna melt...and then i tried to aviod him b/c i knew something would happen if i didn't. then he left for a lil while...then came back...and then i left for a lil while...and then come back...slightly intoxicated...nothing i can't handle. and he hugged me...and i randomly said, "would you mind if i made out with you?" he said no and so we proceeded to make out. ...hmm....interesting. so then i didn't really think much of it until we went to the back of locos where we used to go. i thought maybe we'd just talk, do the whole, im confused, are you confused thing .but you see, that didn't happen. we started kissing. he pushed me against the wall (he knows i like it, don't hate...lol) and we were making out...and yeah, we made out lots....and then i looked at him and i said, "this is really fucking hard." and i started to cry...and he held me. it was the 'i never want to let you go' kind of hug. i admit that through this whole thing i felt like i never felt before. i was so in love with him and there was nothing stopping me from just loving him. plain and simple. throughout these past two months i have not been able to get him out of my head. no matter how hard i try. i love him, and i always will. some people just have that one other person who they know that they can't live without. call me a stupid teenager if you want, but i think i know love when i feel it. i called cory yesterday and we talked. he wanted to know if it was just a one time thing or what. i told him that i didn't know, which i honestly didn't...and then i said that i hoped it wasn't a one time thing. my exact words were, "i love you, i never stopped loving you. i don't think i can stop loving you. i don't know or care if you feel the same way but i love you and i had the balls to say it and i feel better now." and he said he basically felt the same way and that he was a different person with the same feelings. and then he asked me if i could ever forgive him and understand that he is getting his shit together. i told him that i didn't know. (my favorite phrase) so we talked some more and i finally said that yes, i can forgive but i am absolutely petrified to get my heart broken again b/c i love him so fucking much. so then i decided, fuck it, you only live once...so i said that i would give him one more chance....under the condition that if he hurt me i'd castrate him and then send jon after him. so yes, cory and i are back together and honestly i couldn't be happier. i don't have to hide my feelings for him or try to replace them with something else *cough* drinking *cough* smoking *cough* cutting *cough* ... i mean...so yeah, basically i am really happy and honestly don't give a fuck if you are going to try and tell me it'll never work. this is how i feel right now. i feel like i could dance b/c i am in love and it feels great. if it doesn't work then i'll have to deal with a broken heart. i'll get over it...eventually...that's what some people go to college to deal with. i hope it'll last. i love cory robert (hehe, i know his and he doesn't know mine) berry.
PEACE!
~Paigie~
ok, the burning question from Kelly, "What did Cory and I do on Friday night?" well...to start off with....the whole story. When I walked into locos he was there and he gave me one of those hugs that just makes you wanna melt...and then i tried to aviod him b/c i knew something would happen if i didn't. then he left for a lil while...then came back...and then i left for a lil while...and then come back...slightly intoxicated...nothing i can't handle. and he hugged me...and i randomly said, "would you mind if i made out with you?" he said no and so we proceeded to make out. ...hmm....interesting. so then i didn't really think much of it until we went to the back of locos where we used to go. i thought maybe we'd just talk, do the whole, im confused, are you confused thing .but you see, that didn't happen. we started kissing. he pushed me against the wall (he knows i like it, don't hate...lol) and we were making out...and yeah, we made out lots....and then i looked at him and i said, "this is really fucking hard." and i started to cry...and he held me. it was the 'i never want to let you go' kind of hug. i admit that through this whole thing i felt like i never felt before. i was so in love with him and there was nothing stopping me from just loving him. plain and simple. throughout these past two months i have not been able to get him out of my head. no matter how hard i try. i love him, and i always will. some people just have that one other person who they know that they can't live without. call me a stupid teenager if you want, but i think i know love when i feel it. i called cory yesterday and we talked. he wanted to know if it was just a one time thing or what. i told him that i didn't know, which i honestly didn't...and then i said that i hoped it wasn't a one time thing. my exact words were, "i love you, i never stopped loving you. i don't think i can stop loving you. i don't know or care if you feel the same way but i love you and i had the balls to say it and i feel better now." and he said he basically felt the same way and that he was a different person with the same feelings. and then he asked me if i could ever forgive him and understand that he is getting his shit together. i told him that i didn't know. (my favorite phrase) so we talked some more and i finally said that yes, i can forgive but i am absolutely petrified to get my heart broken again b/c i love him so fucking much. so then i decided, fuck it, you only live once...so i said that i would give him one more chance....under the condition that if he hurt me i'd castrate him and then send jon after him. so yes, cory and i are back together and honestly i couldn't be happier. i don't have to hide my feelings for him or try to replace them with something else *cough* drinking *cough* smoking *cough* cutting *cough* ... i mean...so yeah, basically i am really happy and honestly don't give a fuck if you are going to try and tell me it'll never work. this is how i feel right now. i feel like i could dance b/c i am in love and it feels great. if it doesn't work then i'll have to deal with a broken heart. i'll get over it...eventually...that's what some people go to college to deal with. i hope it'll last. i love cory robert (hehe, i know his and he doesn't know mine) berry.
PEACE!
~Paigie~