for drummergroupie: never too late for teenage dreams
With this, round 3 is officially over. I still have pinch hits to post though, so . . . :P Once those are up, I'll round up all the posted fics in a handy round-up post.
TITLE: never too late for teenage dreams
AUTHOR: littlestclouds
RECIPIENT: drummergroupie
RATING: PG-13
DISCLAIMER: The author of this piece intends no insult, slander, or copyright infringement, and is not making any profit or financial gain. This story is a complete work of fiction and does not necessarily reflect on the nature of the individuals featured. This story is for entertainment purposes only. If you found this while Googling your name or the names of your teammates, hit the back button now. And find a different hobby.
WORD COUNT: 3531
PAIRING/CHARACTERS: an amalgam of Dan Haren, Barry Zito, Justin Verlander, Chris Carpenter, and Jessica Haren (mostly minor unrequited Dan Haren/Jessica Haren and Dan Haren/Barry Zito bromance), with appearances by/mentions of other familiar names
WARNING: ( skip) Very minor drug use.
NOTES: Written for drummergroupie for the third round of bats_and_balls. I’m sorry I suck so bad and that this is so late and crappy. Nothing was resolved. lol. The ages are kind of messed up too (most of them are seniors; Justin is a junior). guitargirl39 wrote high school AU too, and hers is almost certainly loads better than this, so read that one first. Title from “Teenage Dreams,” by Nada Surf.
SUMMARY: “I know you think you’re so noble, pining away for someone you’ll never have, but you’re really not. It’s pathetic.”
never too late for teenage dreams
“I know you think you’re so noble, pining away for someone you’ll never have, but you’re really not. It’s pathetic.”
Danny looked up from the chemistry textbook he was only half studying. “Oh. Hey, Z.” Danny scooted a couple spots down so Zito could sit down next to him.
Zito plucked a shiny, red apple out of a brown paper bag and bit into it. “ ’sup.”
Zito wiped the back of his hand across his mouth and spittle-possibly apple juice-flew everywhere. Danny wrinkled his nose in disgust and shielded himself with the textbook.
“Nothing much. Just studying. Anyway,” Danny said, lowering the book, “what’s this about me pining for someone?”
“You were looking at her again,” Zito said with his mouth full, pointing his apple at Danny’s chest.
“Who?”
“Jessica Valdez,” Zito said.
Danny laughed and shook his head. “I don’t even know who that is, Z.”
“New girl,” Zito said. “Just transferred from Chula Vista. Sweetwater High, I think.”
Danny furrowed his brow; he’d never heard of Sweetwater or this girl Zito seemed to think he was into. “Oh. That’s nice.”
“Don’t play coy, man. Just go over to her, say hi or something.” Zito opened his backpack and pulled out a piece of wrinkled paper. “Oh, hey, I’ve got chem after lunch. You too?”
Danny nodded. “Yeah. Chavvy too, I think.”
Zito clapped him between the shoulder blades, hard. “Already starting the new year off right,” he said, slinging his bag over his right shoulder-Zito was a lefthanded starter for the school’s varsity baseball team and lefties were, as far as Danny could tell, kind of weird-and getting up. Zito did pretty much everything with his right hand because he was terrified of even, like, breaking a nail on the other hand.
“See you then, Z,” Danny said, waving him off.
Zito trotted off, and Danny watched as their fellow students practically parted like the Red Sea for him. Danny would have given his right arm to be on the pitching staff this year, but he was one of the final cuts. So, Danny took a job at the local video rental and quietly seethed to himself while his best friend became Big Man on Campus and the Sundevils’ ace lefthander.
Danny wasn’t a jealous person by nature, but he’d never wanted anything the way he’d wanted a spot in the Sundevils’ rotation. The fact two of his best friends-Zito and Noah-were going to be on that staff killed him a little inside.
Danny picked up his bright blue chemistry text, shoved it in his bookbag, and left for class.
-
Jessica Valdez was beautiful, quite possibly the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen. He had to give Zito that much. Even their old curmudgeon of a chemistry teacher seemed flustered, as he looked over her pink transfer slip.
Jessica glanced about the classroom and then her eyes fell on Danny. He could have sworn he saw the corner of her mouth twitch up in a slight smile, but he was probably just imagining things now.
“Miss Valdez, welcome to Chemistry 101. There’s an empty seat next to Dan Haren in the back.” Mr. Washington pointed to Danny with Jessica’s folded up transfer slip.
Jessica smiled, picked a white shopping bag up off the floor, and made her way to Danny’s table in the back of the classroom. “Hi,” she said, smiling sweetly at him.
“Hi.” Danny reached out and pulled her seat out for her a little bit. “I’m Danny. Um, Dan. Nobody really calls me Danny anymore, except for my mom and my sister Stephanie.” He could feel his neck begin to flush. Way to overshare, genius.
Jessica laughed and flipped her long, dark hair behind her shoulders. “Well, Danny, you can call me Jess.”
Danny smiled at her. “Nice to meet you, Jess.”
-
Danny met up with Zito behind the bleachers after class, like they’d planned earlier. Zito was leaning against one of the metal beams, eyes closed, iPod earbuds in, tapping a pencil against his thigh.
Danny approached him and slapped him on the shoulder. Zito jumped a mile and narrowly missed hitting his head on the underside of one of the hard bleacher seats.
“Asshole,” Zito huffed, but he didn’t seem too pissed. He thumbed down the volume on his iPod and tucked it back in his pocket. “What’s up?”
“Nothing much. Why the hell did you wanna meet under the bleachers?” Danny dropped his backpack on the ground and bent down to retie his shoelaces.
“There’s this new kid on the baseball team,” Zito whispered. “The team’s gonna haze him or something.”
“Why are you whispering? No one cares,” Danny said.
“C’mon, if the coaches find out? We’re screwed.”
“I’m not even on the team. I shouldn’t even be here,” Danny said, grabbing his bag and standing up to leave.
“They said it was cool if you came too. They pretty much think of you as one of the guys, anyways,” Zito said.
“You’re not gonna do anything too crazy, are you?” Danny asked, shouldering his backpack straps.
“Do I look like I’d do anything crazy?” Zito grinned at him.
Danny didn’t bother responding to that. He just rolled his eyes and began scanning the patchy green fields the rest of Zito’s teammates. Chris Carpenter, one of the four year starters, appeared in full uniform, dragging some skinny, knock-kneed kid along behind him.
“Is that the kid?” Danny asked, elbowing Zito in the side.
“Yeah, Justin something,” Zito said. “Transferred from some hick school in Virginia.”
Danny glanced back at Carp and the kid, who were being trailed by the rest of the baseball team. “What’s he doing all the way out here in San Diego?”
“Lowry said his dad got a job out here for, like, whatever. I don’t know.” Zito shrugged and pushed away from the bleacher beam he was leaning against. “What do I care? Leave the gossip to Lowry.”
One of the kids-some guy Danny didn’t know-trailing Carp and Justin Something was carrying a dented metal bucket in his arms. Danny both wondered and dreaded what the guys had in store for this new kid.
Noah spotted the three of them first and broke away from the group, boasting a big smile. “Danny! Didn’t know you were gonna be here.” He heade over to Danny and enveloped him in a warm hug. Danny hugged him back and they both ignored the derisive snickers from Noah’s teammates.
Danny pulled away and jerked his thumb in Zito’s direction. “Blame Zito.”
“Of course.” Noah glanced back at the rest of their teammates. “New kid,” he said simply, by way of explanation.
“Zito, Lowry, get your butts over here,” Carp called out. “Haren, you can enjoy the show if you want.”
Noah and Zito heeded Carp’s call, and Danny trotted after them, not one to be left out. Carp grabbed the metal bucket from the kid Danny didn’t know and set it down in the grass.
“What’re you guys gonna make me do,” the new kid asked, eyeing the bucket with a healthy amount of suspicion.
“Give it here.” Carp pointed to one of the other players, who brought forth what looked like a jar of-pickled eggs? “You’re gonna eat every last one of these.”
The kid looked at the jar of eggs and then back to Carp. “Seriously? That’s gross.”
“It’s not the grossest thing we’ve ever come up with,” Carp said, smirking, hefting the jar from hand to hand. “But that kinda stuff’s been banned ever since McGwire and Canseco got arrested for public indecency, like, a million years ago.” He held out the jar of eggs to Justin like it was a peace offering.
“We didn’t do this back at my old school,” Justin said, eyeing the jar and sniffing indignantly.
“This isn't your old school, kid. You’re in California now. Keep up,” Carp said, pushing the jar of eggs into Justin’s chest. “Get to eating.” He kicked the bucket over toward Justin.
Justin unscrewed the lid and reached into the jar, wrinkling his nose and squinching his eyes shut. He wrapped his fingers around a slippery white egg and shook off the brine. He twisted his face into a disgusted grimace. “This is gross. What if I get sick?”
Carp shrugged. “They’re just eggs. You’ll be fine.”
Danny nudged Zito again. “Is there a contingency plan if the new kid croaks?”
“You’re our contingency plan,” Zito said, grinning lopsidedly at Danny.
Danny turned his attention back to Justin and watched, with a mixture of horror and admiration, as Justin shoved the egg into his mouth and started chewing. Danny tried very hard not to wish something did happen to this Justin kid so that he’d get that spot on the team. “I wouldn’t have the balls to do that.”
“What’s Waino think about all this, huh Carp?” Zito called out, hands cupped around his mouth.
Carp turned and glared at him. “Don’t talk about Waino.”
Danny ducked his head and hid a laugh. Waino-Adam Wainwright-was Carp’s best friend, and the team’s currently injured ace. There’d been whispers floating around that Waino would need Tommy John and would probably get passed over in the upcoming June draft.
Carp and Waino were as thick as thieves, and if Danny didn’t know any better, he’d think maybe there was something going on between the two of them.
“What’s so funny, Haren,” one of the other guys asked, his tone light and teasing.
“Nothing, Yadi,” Danny said, glancing back at Justin, who looked like he might actually throw up now. He plucked another egg out of the jar and gagged, pressing a hand over his mouth.
“C’mon, Verlander, don’t be a pussy,” Carp said, whacking him on the shoulder. “You’re almost there.”
“This is stupid,” Justin mumbled, dropping the egg back in the jar.
“You’re not punking out on us, are you?” Carp asked, sneering. “C’mon, man.”
Justin capped the jar and shoved it away. “I’m gonna throw up, asshole.”
“That’s kind of the point,” Zito chimed in, laughter in his tone.
Justin wrapped an arm around his stomach. “Screw you guys. I’m out.” He got to his feet unsteadily and wobbled away.
“You’re just gonna let him leave?” Danny asked, as he watched Justin’s retreating form.
Carp shrugged. “We’ll catch enough hell just for the prank, if he tells,” he said, sighing disappointedly. “Never had a guy punk out like that, though.”
“Thinks he’s too good for us. They must do things different in Virginia,” Zito said, nodding sagely, as he affected an exaggerated Southern drawl that didn’t sound anything like Justin.
Danny rolled his eyes. “All right, guys, it’s been fun. I gotta go.”
“See ya, Haren,” Carp said.
Zito gave Danny a grin and a salute. “Adios.”
-
Danny wandered through the rest of the school day in a mindless fog until English. He hadn’t seen Jessica-or Justin, for that matter-since that morning, but they were both in his English class. Jessica was writing in a notebook, tongue peaking out between her lips in concentration. Danny looked away quickly and hoped no one had caught him watching her like a creep. He caught Justin’s eye, then, and they nodded to each other in recognition.
“You were there this morning,” Justin said, leaning across the aisle toward Danny.
“Yeah, but I’m not on the team,” Danny said, shifting in his seat. “I thought that whole thing was stupid.”
Justin shrugged. “Could’ve been worse, I guess. I heard the horror stories about McGwire and Canseco.”
Danny snorted. “Oh yeah. Everyone does. They’re the cautionary tale.”
Mark McGwire and José Canseco were living legends at Mt. Carmel for all the wrong reasons. He heard McGwire had moved back into his parents’ place after juvie, got a job at the In-N-Out in Pacific Beach. There were all kinds of feverishly whispered stories about Canseco-Canseco went back to Cuba, Canseco got sent to prison, Canseco died, et cetera-but the truth was, no one really knew.
Justin reached into his book bag and pulled out a notebook and a pen. “We didn’t do anything like this back home,” he said, uncapping his pen.
“What’d you do for team camaraderie?” Danny asked.
Justin looked at him like his hair was on fire, or something. “We, like, hung out and did stuff together. Plus, our school banned hazing back in the eighties, or whatever.” He set his pen down and turned toward Danny in his seat. “So, how come you didn’t make the team? You seem pretty buddy-buddy with all the guys, anyways.”
Danny looked down at the cover of his notebook. “I was one of the final cuts. I got a full ride to Pepperdine, anyway. I don’t need baseball,” he said.
It was a lie. Well, not the ‘going to Pepperdine’ part, that part was true. The rest of it, though-the idea that he didn’t need baseball-was completely and utterly false. It was his senior year; he should have been one of the leaders of the team. Instead, here he was. A nobody.
“Maybe you could walk on,” Justin said.
“That’s probably not going to happen,” Danny said, glancing at Justin. “But thanks for trying to cheer me up. It almost worked.”
“What’re you going to Pepperdine for,” Justin asked.
“Poly sci, probably. I don’t know what I’ll do with the degree once I get it, though.” Danny shrugged. “I’m hoping to intern in D.C. some day.”
“Sounds like you’ve got your future mapped out,” Justin said. “I didn’t even really want to come here, but my dad got transferred out here and everyone told him this was the best school.”
“It’s good,” Danny agreed, nodding. “Lots of guys who’ve played here went on to the Majors.”
“I wanna be the first overall pick in the draft,” Justin said. “I kinda think part of the reason my dad took this job is so more scouts would notice me. He didn’t think I was getting the attention I deserved back home in Goochland.”
“Goochland?” Danny started to laugh.
“C’mon, it’s not funny.” Justin frowned at him, but Danny could see the beginnings of a smile at the corners of his mouth.
“Dude, it’s funny.”
Justin shrugged and rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say, man.”
Danny grinned at him. “Glad we’re in agreement, then.”
-
It kind of sucked to realize that the Sundevils didn’t need him, but the longer the season progressed, the more evident it became. Carp, Zito and Noah were the Big Three and the anchor of the team, and they were all loads better than Danny. His stubborn pride hadn’t let him see it before, but he was seeing it now, in Technicolor.
Justin was pretty good too, throwing fire and putting up a minuscule ERA and gaudy strikeout numbers.
Part of Danny would always want to have been a part of this, but they were better with out him than they would have been with him. He had a good thing going on at the video rental, too, and, of course, there was Pepperdine.
Poly sci had been his parents’ idea, but what Danny really wanted to go into was acting. Jessica told him he had the “look” to be an actor, and he’d done a couple commercials when he was a kid because his dad had friends in the business and Danny had apparently been a photogenic baby. He was never able to quite shake the bug, only ever able to ignore it or tamp the desire down temporarily, but it was always there.
“Acting? Do you even know what the odds are that you’ll make it,” Zito asked.
Danny and Zito were camped out on a couch in the basement of Danny’s place, watching Saturday morning commercials. Zito pulled an empty soda can and a screwdriver out of the backpack at his feet and set them on the coffee table.
“What are you doing,” Danny asked, eyeing the screwdriver.
“Gonna smoke a bowl.” Zito plucked a Ziploc baggie of weed out of his pocket and waved it in Danny’s face.
Danny made a face, brow wrinkling, and knocked Zito’s hand away. The bag flew out and landed in the plush carpet. “Go get an apple out of the fridge. The aluminum will give you Alzheimer’s.”
“That’s just an old wives’ tale.” Zito grabbed the handle of the screwdriver and twirled it like a baton between his fingers.
Danny shrugged and picked up the TV remote. “Just what I heard,” he said, changing the channel.
“Whatever, man. I make do with what I’ve got.” Zito punched at the can with the screwdriver.
Danny slid his feet out of his sandals and propped them on the coffee table. “Hey, Z?”
Zito paused and lifted his head. “Yeah?”
“You ever wonder what it’ll be like, once we’re done with high school and stuff?” Danny asked, glancing at Zito again.
Zito shrugged and put aside the screwdriver. “Yeah, sometimes, I guess. Sally told me college is supposed to be the time of your life,” he said. Sally was one of Zito’s two older sisters, and had been an R.A. at USC or something. “It’s, like, this great time to be exploring yourself, pushing your boundaries and stuff.”
Danny watched as the crushed soda can slowly morphed into a makeshift pot pipe. “I know. I just-I don’t know what the hell I want to do.”
Zito paused, fingers poised in the air; he looked absurd, like he was in the middle of conducting an orchestra or something. “Neither do I, Danny. No one does.”
Danny sighed and planted his feet on the ground. He flipped the remote in his hand idly. “If I’d just made it on the team, maybe I could’ve-”
“Things happen for a reason, Daniel-san,” Zito said, reaching out and patting Danny on the knee. He stilled his hand there and Danny glanced down at it.
“Daniel-san? Really?”
“You’re avoiding now,” Zito said, pulling his hand away. “But I’m right, and you know it.”
“You always are,” Danny said, sighing.
-
Danny was wiping down the counter when the chimes above the video rental’s door clinked together in welcome. It was an okay job, but it wasn’t anything to write home about. He’d much rather have been practicing with Zito and his teammates.
Someone coughed delicately and Danny looked up; Jessica stepped in and let the door shut gently behind her.
“I didn’t know you worked here,” she called out to him, wearing a broad smile. She waved at him.
Jessica shifted the strap of her backpack over her shoulder and glanced at the tall shelves lined with shiny DVD cases. Danny watched her silently for a few seconds, and wondered if maybe Zito had been on to something.
Danny dropped the rag and stepped out from behind the counter. “Hey, Jess. What’re you looking for?”
She reached into her backpack and pulled out a crumpled piece of goldenrod paper. “I need to check out American Beauty for my Intro to Film class,” she said, looking down, tucking a strand of brown hair behind her ear.
“That’s right over here.” Danny led Jessica to the drama section, paper in hand, and pulled the movie down for her.
Jessica took it from him and offered him a small smile. “Thanks.”
Danny smiled back and tapped a finger against the case. “Just so you know, this is, like, my favorite movie ever.”
“You probably have great taste in movies,” Jessica said, tucking the DVD case under her arm to shift the strap of her bag across her shoulder. “I know you did a little acting, but are you interested in filmmaking too or something?”
Danny had never really given filmmaking serious consideration, although he’d tossed around some screenplay ideas from time to time. Of course, his ideas all revolved around baseball and he’d heard baseball movies never did well. Not much of a future in that, he supposed.
“Not really,” Danny said. “I mean, I like movies and stuff, and I liked doing the commercials. I just don’t think I’d be any good at making movies.”
Jessica tilted her head and scrutinized him. “I think you would be.”
“Really? How come,” he asked, honestly taken aback. Jessica barely knew him, outside of their chemistry class. How would she possibly know he’d be good at, like, anything?
“You just seem like you see things differently than most of the guys here,” she said, laughing. “That’s lame, I know.”
“It’s not,” he said.
Jessica smiled again and held the DVD against her chest. “I really should get going soon, so . . .”
“Oh, yeah. Sure. Sorry.” Danny felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment. “I’ll ring you up.”
After she left, he sat behind the counter and thought about what she’d said. You just seem like you see things differently. He wasn’t so sure he believed her, and yet she seemed to believe what she told him. Jessica saw something in him.
Danny shook his head and laughed quietly. At least someone out there believed in him. Maybe he’d be able to believe too, someday.
TITLE: never too late for teenage dreams
AUTHOR: littlestclouds
RECIPIENT: drummergroupie
RATING: PG-13
DISCLAIMER: The author of this piece intends no insult, slander, or copyright infringement, and is not making any profit or financial gain. This story is a complete work of fiction and does not necessarily reflect on the nature of the individuals featured. This story is for entertainment purposes only. If you found this while Googling your name or the names of your teammates, hit the back button now. And find a different hobby.
WORD COUNT: 3531
PAIRING/CHARACTERS: an amalgam of Dan Haren, Barry Zito, Justin Verlander, Chris Carpenter, and Jessica Haren (mostly minor unrequited Dan Haren/Jessica Haren and Dan Haren/Barry Zito bromance), with appearances by/mentions of other familiar names
WARNING: ( skip) Very minor drug use.
NOTES: Written for drummergroupie for the third round of bats_and_balls. I’m sorry I suck so bad and that this is so late and crappy. Nothing was resolved. lol. The ages are kind of messed up too (most of them are seniors; Justin is a junior). guitargirl39 wrote high school AU too, and hers is almost certainly loads better than this, so read that one first. Title from “Teenage Dreams,” by Nada Surf.
SUMMARY: “I know you think you’re so noble, pining away for someone you’ll never have, but you’re really not. It’s pathetic.”
never too late for teenage dreams
“I know you think you’re so noble, pining away for someone you’ll never have, but you’re really not. It’s pathetic.”
Danny looked up from the chemistry textbook he was only half studying. “Oh. Hey, Z.” Danny scooted a couple spots down so Zito could sit down next to him.
Zito plucked a shiny, red apple out of a brown paper bag and bit into it. “ ’sup.”
Zito wiped the back of his hand across his mouth and spittle-possibly apple juice-flew everywhere. Danny wrinkled his nose in disgust and shielded himself with the textbook.
“Nothing much. Just studying. Anyway,” Danny said, lowering the book, “what’s this about me pining for someone?”
“You were looking at her again,” Zito said with his mouth full, pointing his apple at Danny’s chest.
“Who?”
“Jessica Valdez,” Zito said.
Danny laughed and shook his head. “I don’t even know who that is, Z.”
“New girl,” Zito said. “Just transferred from Chula Vista. Sweetwater High, I think.”
Danny furrowed his brow; he’d never heard of Sweetwater or this girl Zito seemed to think he was into. “Oh. That’s nice.”
“Don’t play coy, man. Just go over to her, say hi or something.” Zito opened his backpack and pulled out a piece of wrinkled paper. “Oh, hey, I’ve got chem after lunch. You too?”
Danny nodded. “Yeah. Chavvy too, I think.”
Zito clapped him between the shoulder blades, hard. “Already starting the new year off right,” he said, slinging his bag over his right shoulder-Zito was a lefthanded starter for the school’s varsity baseball team and lefties were, as far as Danny could tell, kind of weird-and getting up. Zito did pretty much everything with his right hand because he was terrified of even, like, breaking a nail on the other hand.
“See you then, Z,” Danny said, waving him off.
Zito trotted off, and Danny watched as their fellow students practically parted like the Red Sea for him. Danny would have given his right arm to be on the pitching staff this year, but he was one of the final cuts. So, Danny took a job at the local video rental and quietly seethed to himself while his best friend became Big Man on Campus and the Sundevils’ ace lefthander.
Danny wasn’t a jealous person by nature, but he’d never wanted anything the way he’d wanted a spot in the Sundevils’ rotation. The fact two of his best friends-Zito and Noah-were going to be on that staff killed him a little inside.
Danny picked up his bright blue chemistry text, shoved it in his bookbag, and left for class.
-
Jessica Valdez was beautiful, quite possibly the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen. He had to give Zito that much. Even their old curmudgeon of a chemistry teacher seemed flustered, as he looked over her pink transfer slip.
Jessica glanced about the classroom and then her eyes fell on Danny. He could have sworn he saw the corner of her mouth twitch up in a slight smile, but he was probably just imagining things now.
“Miss Valdez, welcome to Chemistry 101. There’s an empty seat next to Dan Haren in the back.” Mr. Washington pointed to Danny with Jessica’s folded up transfer slip.
Jessica smiled, picked a white shopping bag up off the floor, and made her way to Danny’s table in the back of the classroom. “Hi,” she said, smiling sweetly at him.
“Hi.” Danny reached out and pulled her seat out for her a little bit. “I’m Danny. Um, Dan. Nobody really calls me Danny anymore, except for my mom and my sister Stephanie.” He could feel his neck begin to flush. Way to overshare, genius.
Jessica laughed and flipped her long, dark hair behind her shoulders. “Well, Danny, you can call me Jess.”
Danny smiled at her. “Nice to meet you, Jess.”
-
Danny met up with Zito behind the bleachers after class, like they’d planned earlier. Zito was leaning against one of the metal beams, eyes closed, iPod earbuds in, tapping a pencil against his thigh.
Danny approached him and slapped him on the shoulder. Zito jumped a mile and narrowly missed hitting his head on the underside of one of the hard bleacher seats.
“Asshole,” Zito huffed, but he didn’t seem too pissed. He thumbed down the volume on his iPod and tucked it back in his pocket. “What’s up?”
“Nothing much. Why the hell did you wanna meet under the bleachers?” Danny dropped his backpack on the ground and bent down to retie his shoelaces.
“There’s this new kid on the baseball team,” Zito whispered. “The team’s gonna haze him or something.”
“Why are you whispering? No one cares,” Danny said.
“C’mon, if the coaches find out? We’re screwed.”
“I’m not even on the team. I shouldn’t even be here,” Danny said, grabbing his bag and standing up to leave.
“They said it was cool if you came too. They pretty much think of you as one of the guys, anyways,” Zito said.
“You’re not gonna do anything too crazy, are you?” Danny asked, shouldering his backpack straps.
“Do I look like I’d do anything crazy?” Zito grinned at him.
Danny didn’t bother responding to that. He just rolled his eyes and began scanning the patchy green fields the rest of Zito’s teammates. Chris Carpenter, one of the four year starters, appeared in full uniform, dragging some skinny, knock-kneed kid along behind him.
“Is that the kid?” Danny asked, elbowing Zito in the side.
“Yeah, Justin something,” Zito said. “Transferred from some hick school in Virginia.”
Danny glanced back at Carp and the kid, who were being trailed by the rest of the baseball team. “What’s he doing all the way out here in San Diego?”
“Lowry said his dad got a job out here for, like, whatever. I don’t know.” Zito shrugged and pushed away from the bleacher beam he was leaning against. “What do I care? Leave the gossip to Lowry.”
One of the kids-some guy Danny didn’t know-trailing Carp and Justin Something was carrying a dented metal bucket in his arms. Danny both wondered and dreaded what the guys had in store for this new kid.
Noah spotted the three of them first and broke away from the group, boasting a big smile. “Danny! Didn’t know you were gonna be here.” He heade over to Danny and enveloped him in a warm hug. Danny hugged him back and they both ignored the derisive snickers from Noah’s teammates.
Danny pulled away and jerked his thumb in Zito’s direction. “Blame Zito.”
“Of course.” Noah glanced back at the rest of their teammates. “New kid,” he said simply, by way of explanation.
“Zito, Lowry, get your butts over here,” Carp called out. “Haren, you can enjoy the show if you want.”
Noah and Zito heeded Carp’s call, and Danny trotted after them, not one to be left out. Carp grabbed the metal bucket from the kid Danny didn’t know and set it down in the grass.
“What’re you guys gonna make me do,” the new kid asked, eyeing the bucket with a healthy amount of suspicion.
“Give it here.” Carp pointed to one of the other players, who brought forth what looked like a jar of-pickled eggs? “You’re gonna eat every last one of these.”
The kid looked at the jar of eggs and then back to Carp. “Seriously? That’s gross.”
“It’s not the grossest thing we’ve ever come up with,” Carp said, smirking, hefting the jar from hand to hand. “But that kinda stuff’s been banned ever since McGwire and Canseco got arrested for public indecency, like, a million years ago.” He held out the jar of eggs to Justin like it was a peace offering.
“We didn’t do this back at my old school,” Justin said, eyeing the jar and sniffing indignantly.
“This isn't your old school, kid. You’re in California now. Keep up,” Carp said, pushing the jar of eggs into Justin’s chest. “Get to eating.” He kicked the bucket over toward Justin.
Justin unscrewed the lid and reached into the jar, wrinkling his nose and squinching his eyes shut. He wrapped his fingers around a slippery white egg and shook off the brine. He twisted his face into a disgusted grimace. “This is gross. What if I get sick?”
Carp shrugged. “They’re just eggs. You’ll be fine.”
Danny nudged Zito again. “Is there a contingency plan if the new kid croaks?”
“You’re our contingency plan,” Zito said, grinning lopsidedly at Danny.
Danny turned his attention back to Justin and watched, with a mixture of horror and admiration, as Justin shoved the egg into his mouth and started chewing. Danny tried very hard not to wish something did happen to this Justin kid so that he’d get that spot on the team. “I wouldn’t have the balls to do that.”
“What’s Waino think about all this, huh Carp?” Zito called out, hands cupped around his mouth.
Carp turned and glared at him. “Don’t talk about Waino.”
Danny ducked his head and hid a laugh. Waino-Adam Wainwright-was Carp’s best friend, and the team’s currently injured ace. There’d been whispers floating around that Waino would need Tommy John and would probably get passed over in the upcoming June draft.
Carp and Waino were as thick as thieves, and if Danny didn’t know any better, he’d think maybe there was something going on between the two of them.
“What’s so funny, Haren,” one of the other guys asked, his tone light and teasing.
“Nothing, Yadi,” Danny said, glancing back at Justin, who looked like he might actually throw up now. He plucked another egg out of the jar and gagged, pressing a hand over his mouth.
“C’mon, Verlander, don’t be a pussy,” Carp said, whacking him on the shoulder. “You’re almost there.”
“This is stupid,” Justin mumbled, dropping the egg back in the jar.
“You’re not punking out on us, are you?” Carp asked, sneering. “C’mon, man.”
Justin capped the jar and shoved it away. “I’m gonna throw up, asshole.”
“That’s kind of the point,” Zito chimed in, laughter in his tone.
Justin wrapped an arm around his stomach. “Screw you guys. I’m out.” He got to his feet unsteadily and wobbled away.
“You’re just gonna let him leave?” Danny asked, as he watched Justin’s retreating form.
Carp shrugged. “We’ll catch enough hell just for the prank, if he tells,” he said, sighing disappointedly. “Never had a guy punk out like that, though.”
“Thinks he’s too good for us. They must do things different in Virginia,” Zito said, nodding sagely, as he affected an exaggerated Southern drawl that didn’t sound anything like Justin.
Danny rolled his eyes. “All right, guys, it’s been fun. I gotta go.”
“See ya, Haren,” Carp said.
Zito gave Danny a grin and a salute. “Adios.”
-
Danny wandered through the rest of the school day in a mindless fog until English. He hadn’t seen Jessica-or Justin, for that matter-since that morning, but they were both in his English class. Jessica was writing in a notebook, tongue peaking out between her lips in concentration. Danny looked away quickly and hoped no one had caught him watching her like a creep. He caught Justin’s eye, then, and they nodded to each other in recognition.
“You were there this morning,” Justin said, leaning across the aisle toward Danny.
“Yeah, but I’m not on the team,” Danny said, shifting in his seat. “I thought that whole thing was stupid.”
Justin shrugged. “Could’ve been worse, I guess. I heard the horror stories about McGwire and Canseco.”
Danny snorted. “Oh yeah. Everyone does. They’re the cautionary tale.”
Mark McGwire and José Canseco were living legends at Mt. Carmel for all the wrong reasons. He heard McGwire had moved back into his parents’ place after juvie, got a job at the In-N-Out in Pacific Beach. There were all kinds of feverishly whispered stories about Canseco-Canseco went back to Cuba, Canseco got sent to prison, Canseco died, et cetera-but the truth was, no one really knew.
Justin reached into his book bag and pulled out a notebook and a pen. “We didn’t do anything like this back home,” he said, uncapping his pen.
“What’d you do for team camaraderie?” Danny asked.
Justin looked at him like his hair was on fire, or something. “We, like, hung out and did stuff together. Plus, our school banned hazing back in the eighties, or whatever.” He set his pen down and turned toward Danny in his seat. “So, how come you didn’t make the team? You seem pretty buddy-buddy with all the guys, anyways.”
Danny looked down at the cover of his notebook. “I was one of the final cuts. I got a full ride to Pepperdine, anyway. I don’t need baseball,” he said.
It was a lie. Well, not the ‘going to Pepperdine’ part, that part was true. The rest of it, though-the idea that he didn’t need baseball-was completely and utterly false. It was his senior year; he should have been one of the leaders of the team. Instead, here he was. A nobody.
“Maybe you could walk on,” Justin said.
“That’s probably not going to happen,” Danny said, glancing at Justin. “But thanks for trying to cheer me up. It almost worked.”
“What’re you going to Pepperdine for,” Justin asked.
“Poly sci, probably. I don’t know what I’ll do with the degree once I get it, though.” Danny shrugged. “I’m hoping to intern in D.C. some day.”
“Sounds like you’ve got your future mapped out,” Justin said. “I didn’t even really want to come here, but my dad got transferred out here and everyone told him this was the best school.”
“It’s good,” Danny agreed, nodding. “Lots of guys who’ve played here went on to the Majors.”
“I wanna be the first overall pick in the draft,” Justin said. “I kinda think part of the reason my dad took this job is so more scouts would notice me. He didn’t think I was getting the attention I deserved back home in Goochland.”
“Goochland?” Danny started to laugh.
“C’mon, it’s not funny.” Justin frowned at him, but Danny could see the beginnings of a smile at the corners of his mouth.
“Dude, it’s funny.”
Justin shrugged and rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say, man.”
Danny grinned at him. “Glad we’re in agreement, then.”
-
It kind of sucked to realize that the Sundevils didn’t need him, but the longer the season progressed, the more evident it became. Carp, Zito and Noah were the Big Three and the anchor of the team, and they were all loads better than Danny. His stubborn pride hadn’t let him see it before, but he was seeing it now, in Technicolor.
Justin was pretty good too, throwing fire and putting up a minuscule ERA and gaudy strikeout numbers.
Part of Danny would always want to have been a part of this, but they were better with out him than they would have been with him. He had a good thing going on at the video rental, too, and, of course, there was Pepperdine.
Poly sci had been his parents’ idea, but what Danny really wanted to go into was acting. Jessica told him he had the “look” to be an actor, and he’d done a couple commercials when he was a kid because his dad had friends in the business and Danny had apparently been a photogenic baby. He was never able to quite shake the bug, only ever able to ignore it or tamp the desire down temporarily, but it was always there.
“Acting? Do you even know what the odds are that you’ll make it,” Zito asked.
Danny and Zito were camped out on a couch in the basement of Danny’s place, watching Saturday morning commercials. Zito pulled an empty soda can and a screwdriver out of the backpack at his feet and set them on the coffee table.
“What are you doing,” Danny asked, eyeing the screwdriver.
“Gonna smoke a bowl.” Zito plucked a Ziploc baggie of weed out of his pocket and waved it in Danny’s face.
Danny made a face, brow wrinkling, and knocked Zito’s hand away. The bag flew out and landed in the plush carpet. “Go get an apple out of the fridge. The aluminum will give you Alzheimer’s.”
“That’s just an old wives’ tale.” Zito grabbed the handle of the screwdriver and twirled it like a baton between his fingers.
Danny shrugged and picked up the TV remote. “Just what I heard,” he said, changing the channel.
“Whatever, man. I make do with what I’ve got.” Zito punched at the can with the screwdriver.
Danny slid his feet out of his sandals and propped them on the coffee table. “Hey, Z?”
Zito paused and lifted his head. “Yeah?”
“You ever wonder what it’ll be like, once we’re done with high school and stuff?” Danny asked, glancing at Zito again.
Zito shrugged and put aside the screwdriver. “Yeah, sometimes, I guess. Sally told me college is supposed to be the time of your life,” he said. Sally was one of Zito’s two older sisters, and had been an R.A. at USC or something. “It’s, like, this great time to be exploring yourself, pushing your boundaries and stuff.”
Danny watched as the crushed soda can slowly morphed into a makeshift pot pipe. “I know. I just-I don’t know what the hell I want to do.”
Zito paused, fingers poised in the air; he looked absurd, like he was in the middle of conducting an orchestra or something. “Neither do I, Danny. No one does.”
Danny sighed and planted his feet on the ground. He flipped the remote in his hand idly. “If I’d just made it on the team, maybe I could’ve-”
“Things happen for a reason, Daniel-san,” Zito said, reaching out and patting Danny on the knee. He stilled his hand there and Danny glanced down at it.
“Daniel-san? Really?”
“You’re avoiding now,” Zito said, pulling his hand away. “But I’m right, and you know it.”
“You always are,” Danny said, sighing.
-
Danny was wiping down the counter when the chimes above the video rental’s door clinked together in welcome. It was an okay job, but it wasn’t anything to write home about. He’d much rather have been practicing with Zito and his teammates.
Someone coughed delicately and Danny looked up; Jessica stepped in and let the door shut gently behind her.
“I didn’t know you worked here,” she called out to him, wearing a broad smile. She waved at him.
Jessica shifted the strap of her backpack over her shoulder and glanced at the tall shelves lined with shiny DVD cases. Danny watched her silently for a few seconds, and wondered if maybe Zito had been on to something.
Danny dropped the rag and stepped out from behind the counter. “Hey, Jess. What’re you looking for?”
She reached into her backpack and pulled out a crumpled piece of goldenrod paper. “I need to check out American Beauty for my Intro to Film class,” she said, looking down, tucking a strand of brown hair behind her ear.
“That’s right over here.” Danny led Jessica to the drama section, paper in hand, and pulled the movie down for her.
Jessica took it from him and offered him a small smile. “Thanks.”
Danny smiled back and tapped a finger against the case. “Just so you know, this is, like, my favorite movie ever.”
“You probably have great taste in movies,” Jessica said, tucking the DVD case under her arm to shift the strap of her bag across her shoulder. “I know you did a little acting, but are you interested in filmmaking too or something?”
Danny had never really given filmmaking serious consideration, although he’d tossed around some screenplay ideas from time to time. Of course, his ideas all revolved around baseball and he’d heard baseball movies never did well. Not much of a future in that, he supposed.
“Not really,” Danny said. “I mean, I like movies and stuff, and I liked doing the commercials. I just don’t think I’d be any good at making movies.”
Jessica tilted her head and scrutinized him. “I think you would be.”
“Really? How come,” he asked, honestly taken aback. Jessica barely knew him, outside of their chemistry class. How would she possibly know he’d be good at, like, anything?
“You just seem like you see things differently than most of the guys here,” she said, laughing. “That’s lame, I know.”
“It’s not,” he said.
Jessica smiled again and held the DVD against her chest. “I really should get going soon, so . . .”
“Oh, yeah. Sure. Sorry.” Danny felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment. “I’ll ring you up.”
After she left, he sat behind the counter and thought about what she’d said. You just seem like you see things differently. He wasn’t so sure he believed her, and yet she seemed to believe what she told him. Jessica saw something in him.
Danny shook his head and laughed quietly. At least someone out there believed in him. Maybe he’d be able to believe too, someday.