(no subject)
On Thursday I had my 41 week midwife appointment. Everything was looking good, but I was exhausted. I'd been kept up by contractions for a few days now and I felt like I was breaking down. I couldn't move anymore without being in a good deal of pain and it was making me feel like I was going to lose my mind. I asked Linda if she could sweep my membranes to try to get things moving since I felt I was ready, I just needed a little nudge to get things going. She did and I was between 1 and 2 cm and 50% effaced. After the appointment I met Andy at Earth Fare and we went grocery shopping and then had dinner. I was having contractions during dinner but ignored them, thinking that it was probably just because of the internal exam. They kept up though and started getting stronger when I got home, so I sat on my yoga ball and checked my email until bed time. I called my mom and let her know that I might go into labor that night and that I would call her as soon as things picked up. I went to bed and got Caitlin to sleep. Around midnight I got up and checked my cervix to see if any change had been made. I found myself at between a 3 and a 4, but the contractions weren't lasting very long and were pretty irregular. I called my mom and told her that I was pretty sure I was really in labor, but that it was early yet and I was going to wait a bit before calling the midwives. Because I went so fast with Caitlin she urged me to call them right away and let them know what was going on. I promised her that I would and that I would call her as soon as the baby was born. I went and woke Andy up and told him that I thought I was in labor and that he should call his mom to let her know. I called my midwife Amy and told her what was going on. She told me she would be taking a shower and would be on her way after that. Andy's mom got here shortly and we spent some time just waiting around for the midwives while I kept contracting. Sean and Caitlin were asleep so we stayed out in the living room, Andy took a shower and got something to eat.
About an hour later Amy and Mary got here. Before we got everything set up Amy checked me and I was at 4 cm, so she felt good about calling Linda and having her come on out too. We moved Caitlin out of the bedroom so we could get set up, but she wasn't happy about being transfered to her bed in Sean's room. Andy's mom held her on the couch until she settled again, then laid her down on the couch where she slept all night.
For a few hours we just hung out in my bedroom chatting and filling the birth pool, looking at pictures on Amy's laptop as the contractions rolled on. They were painful but not unbearable. I sat on the birth ball a bit, but that spaced the contractions out and made them less powerful, so I stood and walked around until the pool was full. We joked that it was fun, like a slumber party with a baby at the end.
I finally got into the pool after Linda got there. We turned out the lights and I labored in the pool for around an hour. I asked Amy if she would check me to see if progress was being made because I felt like the contractions weren't doing much. I was right because Amy found me to be at 4.5 cm. They suggested I do a maneuver to move the baby into a better position and had me labor through two contractions on my right side, then two on hands and knees, two on my left side and two on my back. I did that twice and got up to labor on the toilet for a few contractions. I asked to be checked again and I was at 8 cm.
I labored in the pool for about another hour, but I was starting to feel that awful trapped feeling of transition. I wasn't handling the contractions well anymore, although I hadn't started to freak out yet. I did the maneuver again, got out of the tub, sat on the toilet, stood by the bed, lay on the bed, I just couldn't find anything that felt okay. I asked Amy to check me and I was still at 8 cm, and she said that if I pushed through one contraction she could probably move that bit out of the way and I would be complete. She said his head wasn't positioned quite right and wasn't applying pressure to my cervix correctly. I couldn't handle the idea of pushing and having her manually move my cervix, so I got back in the tub for another hour. I cried after contractions because as much as they hurt I just knew I wasn't getting anywhere. I asked Amy to check me again to confirm that feeling and I was still at 8. She offered to move my cervix out of the way again and this time I decided to go for it. I pushed on hands and knees in the birth pool while she moved it out of the way. That was an incredibly painful thing to do, and it took two contractions, but after the second one was over I was complete, my water broke, and I started pushing right away. By this time it was 7:30 in the morning and Sean was awake, so he got to witness the awful pushing the cervix out of the way. He was so excited that his brother was on his way that he didn't even mind the yells I was making during that. He said I had a beautiful voice. As soon as I started pushing Caitlin woke up and Andy's mom went to get her as well. Pushing was intense... but for the first time it felt better to push than to deal with non-pushing contractions. I felt very out of control and was gasping for breath between contractions, almost hyperventilating. My midwives sat by the birth tub while Andy was behind me in the water and got my attention between contractions and helped me focus. After a few pushes his head was mostly out, but it felt like there was someone inside pulling him back in by his ankles. It was a really weird feeling. He came out sunny side up, so after I pushed his head all the way out I felt him turn all the way around. I checked for the cord and couldn't feel anything so I went ahead and pushed one more time and he was totally born. Andy and I were the only ones catching, and I stood up right away when he was born. He was totally blue, but breathing, and his cord was looped up over his shoulder and around the back of his neck. The first thing I said was "Why is he blue?". Amy and Linda assured me that he was just a little shocky but he was fine. He started pinking up right away and got apgars of 8 and 9. I climbed into bed and pushed the placenta out. Sean and Caitlin curled up in bed with me and we all spent some time just being with Gabriel. I thought he was so small and guessed he was around 7 lbs. I was shocked when Andy weighed him and found him to be 9 lbs.
I'm so glad I had another home birth. When I was going through the hell of transition I remember thinking how stupid it was to have a baby at home, and how I wished I was in the hospital so I could have a damn epidural. But now, I'm so proud that I got through it. I had a difficult labor, and I did it. I caught my own baby for the second time and no one was in control of that but me. I'm even more proud of this time than I am of Caitlin's birth because of how hard it was.
This past week has been pretty good. My parents got here last Sunday and my mom cooked, cleaned and helped with the kids while I rested with Gabriel. My dad spent most of the week putting up a new swingset for the kids. They're so excited about it, I think we'll be spending a good amount of our time out there playing on it this summer. They left yesterday, and so far Andy and I are doing fine on our own.
Nursing is going well now. Gabriel had a bad latch and damaged my poor nipples pretty badly the first two days. I had blood blisters on the tips, but we've fixed his latch and my poor nipples have healed. Engorgement sucked, as usual. He only nurses on one side at a feeding so the other breast just had to suffer for a few more hours. The afterpains contractions were also terrible, they really do get worse with each baby.
Andy is taking all of next week off from work, so I'll have lots of help for another week.
Okay, picture time.
