Hunger only for a taste of justice. Hunger only for a world of truth.
Today I’ve been thinking about how I can’t really fix the world until I fix myself. I keep feeling like I need to take off and go on some sort of journey to figure out what I want. This current path is great, but it’s also burning me out.
My hair cut appointment got cancelled and I’m upset, because my hair is way too shaggy right now. My stylist can’t see me until next week but Jeff will be gone then and there seem to be no busses to get there. I had picked out such a sweet cut, it was between a faux hawk and a mohawk. I want to get something a little extreme because while I’m not working, I can. But I don’t want to go to on the Camp-Out with this shaggy mess!
Speaking off, the planning is continuing to go well but being overwhelming and complicated. We needed a fourth adult because we had so many kids apply, but that turned out to be really hard to fill. Everyone that would work was going to be out of town or was otherwise busy. Finally I hit on Hannah, who doesn’t have youth experience but is gay and works with the very high risk ladies of the Women’s Shelter. So that? I think will actually be super great. I get along with her super well but don’t see her often enough. It’ll be fun for me to have her to chat with and I’m looking forward to ‘training’ her with the leadership stuff using all I’ve learnt this year. And I think she’ll benefit a lot from the camp herself.
Now we just have a crapload of logistical stuff to work out. And money. And food. And tents and transportation and yada yada. We’re having our first real meeting amongst the four adult leaders tomorrow. I’ve actually been looking forward to it, I want to get this shit sorted. I’m excited!
I miss Carrie. I miss Erica. They both seem happier in their new homes, but also lost. Carrie is still nursing her random break up that she refuses to talk about. Erica has met someone and I’m actually really, really happy for her (which is a feeling that’s surprising me) because this girl seems like a great fit. But Erica isn’t liking the people in Victoria for reasons I’m very familiar with. I think people would be shocked to know how individuality seems much stronger in Alberta than it does in British Columbia. Erica said that she’s now living in the basement of a rich family in a rich area and she hates how she doesn’t fit into the neighbourhood. When she was cleaning her truck, a group of Desperate Housewives looking women stared at her from a balcony while they drank martinis. Really? REALLY?
Perhaps the more conservative a place, the more important a sense of self is. I get the feeling that people in BC spend so much time coasting through life and enjoying themselves, the lack of struggle leaves them undefined.
‘Without struggle, there is no progress.’
These are generalizations of course and I could back my theories up, but it’s probably boring to read and outlandish, so I’ll quit. Feel free to ask me about it though, I did a lot of investigating while I was out there. And it makes me think of a conversation I had with my friend Jordan at Folk Fest. He’s a brilliant little ‘change agent’ trying to make a better world who was commending me on my work with queer youth as I commended him on his civic activism and we agreed, passionate high fives and all, about how ludicrous it is when the suggestion is made to people like us that we should move to Toronto or Vancouver.
“Alberta, this is where the fight needs to happen. This is Canada’s ‘battleground state’. This is where change is most important.” he said.
Yes, and this is home.
My hair cut appointment got cancelled and I’m upset, because my hair is way too shaggy right now. My stylist can’t see me until next week but Jeff will be gone then and there seem to be no busses to get there. I had picked out such a sweet cut, it was between a faux hawk and a mohawk. I want to get something a little extreme because while I’m not working, I can. But I don’t want to go to on the Camp-Out with this shaggy mess!
Speaking off, the planning is continuing to go well but being overwhelming and complicated. We needed a fourth adult because we had so many kids apply, but that turned out to be really hard to fill. Everyone that would work was going to be out of town or was otherwise busy. Finally I hit on Hannah, who doesn’t have youth experience but is gay and works with the very high risk ladies of the Women’s Shelter. So that? I think will actually be super great. I get along with her super well but don’t see her often enough. It’ll be fun for me to have her to chat with and I’m looking forward to ‘training’ her with the leadership stuff using all I’ve learnt this year. And I think she’ll benefit a lot from the camp herself.
Now we just have a crapload of logistical stuff to work out. And money. And food. And tents and transportation and yada yada. We’re having our first real meeting amongst the four adult leaders tomorrow. I’ve actually been looking forward to it, I want to get this shit sorted. I’m excited!
I miss Carrie. I miss Erica. They both seem happier in their new homes, but also lost. Carrie is still nursing her random break up that she refuses to talk about. Erica has met someone and I’m actually really, really happy for her (which is a feeling that’s surprising me) because this girl seems like a great fit. But Erica isn’t liking the people in Victoria for reasons I’m very familiar with. I think people would be shocked to know how individuality seems much stronger in Alberta than it does in British Columbia. Erica said that she’s now living in the basement of a rich family in a rich area and she hates how she doesn’t fit into the neighbourhood. When she was cleaning her truck, a group of Desperate Housewives looking women stared at her from a balcony while they drank martinis. Really? REALLY?
Perhaps the more conservative a place, the more important a sense of self is. I get the feeling that people in BC spend so much time coasting through life and enjoying themselves, the lack of struggle leaves them undefined.
‘Without struggle, there is no progress.’
These are generalizations of course and I could back my theories up, but it’s probably boring to read and outlandish, so I’ll quit. Feel free to ask me about it though, I did a lot of investigating while I was out there. And it makes me think of a conversation I had with my friend Jordan at Folk Fest. He’s a brilliant little ‘change agent’ trying to make a better world who was commending me on my work with queer youth as I commended him on his civic activism and we agreed, passionate high fives and all, about how ludicrous it is when the suggestion is made to people like us that we should move to Toronto or Vancouver.
“Alberta, this is where the fight needs to happen. This is Canada’s ‘battleground state’. This is where change is most important.” he said.
Yes, and this is home.