When!?
This should be over now right? Sigh...
I talk a big game. I say how I am going to take this thing I have that passes for a life and make something amazing out of it. How I'm going to go live it up, meet amazing new people, find an awesome non-office job, move away. But I don't.
I know I have it in me. I'm just one random jump in the car away from just picking up and going. I've minimized my life to a very manageable amount of "stuff". I have a car that works. So why not!?
What's keeping me here? What's keeping me mediocre?
I miss everyone and everything. My old apartment. My old job. I miss a best friend who has become distant and driven and a best friend who has decided I am toxic. I feel as if every choice I've made in the last couple years has been straight WRONG.
I miss passion.
And even as I write this, I know I wont make some grand gesture. I'll sit and wait for circumstances to change.
I talk a big game. I say how I am going to take this thing I have that passes for a life and make something amazing out of it. How I'm going to go live it up, meet amazing new people, find an awesome non-office job, move away. But I don't.
I know I have it in me. I'm just one random jump in the car away from just picking up and going. I've minimized my life to a very manageable amount of "stuff". I have a car that works. So why not!?
What's keeping me here? What's keeping me mediocre?
I miss everyone and everything. My old apartment. My old job. I miss a best friend who has become distant and driven and a best friend who has decided I am toxic. I feel as if every choice I've made in the last couple years has been straight WRONG.
I miss passion.
And even as I write this, I know I wont make some grand gesture. I'll sit and wait for circumstances to change.