I'm sorry.
There is so much I want to say, but just don't have the time right now. Of course, I never have time. Never have time to *not* be alone . . . never have time to be social . . . never have time to be a friend . . . never have time to be happy . . .
These past 2 years I've suffered some great losses in my life (not just death) and deep depression always seems to be lingering. I've become a semi-workaholic just trying to preoccupy my mind and because I feel like I actually have good friends at work who make my day a little more tolerable (although I really miss seeing Crystal at work everyday . . . :o( ). Any way, I feel like I need to be forced to get my shit together and to try and be happy. However, I can't deny that I feel like I am destined to be lonely forever. I find that something I have a harder time overcoming than most. I don't know if I need new antidepressants (or to at least take them regularly), some sort of spiritual awakening, or what. I'm really at a loss about what to do.
I'll write more later . . . I hope.
These past 2 years I've suffered some great losses in my life (not just death) and deep depression always seems to be lingering. I've become a semi-workaholic just trying to preoccupy my mind and because I feel like I actually have good friends at work who make my day a little more tolerable (although I really miss seeing Crystal at work everyday . . . :o( ). Any way, I feel like I need to be forced to get my shit together and to try and be happy. However, I can't deny that I feel like I am destined to be lonely forever. I find that something I have a harder time overcoming than most. I don't know if I need new antidepressants (or to at least take them regularly), some sort of spiritual awakening, or what. I'm really at a loss about what to do.
I'll write more later . . . I hope.