Snark 019: Snape [In Person] (Backdated to Thursday)

[jadedserpent]

[Against his better judgment, Snape has been drawn to a group of people dressed in black robes.  There are plenty of other absurd costumes, but there are lots of what looks like Hogwarts students here.  Many of them have the House badges sewn onto the robes, but they look different from the robes Snape's wearing.  He ignores them and pushes past

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[ow_myface]

[Oh? Shinji happen to hear the agonized shout from the rather angry looking boy, reading over something or another... that seemed to be the source of his anger. Well he just HAD to get in on this~

So in a blink there's a wild Shinji behind Snape, and an appropriate YOINK~ as he pulls the paper from Snape's hands, and without a word begins to read it]

[jadedserpent]

Hey!

[Snape reaches out to grab the story. He doesn't want anyone else reading this. It's slanderous and embarrassing.] What the hell do you think you're doing?

[ow_myface]

I'm seein' what all yer yellin' is about. It's gotta be somethin' good fer a yell like that~

[And he expertly dodges the grabbing attempt with a little twirl]

Let's what we got here~

[jadedserpent]

You...

[He would have Summoned it or burned it with magic, but ever since cursing one annoying person his wand hasn't worked. So instead he grabs for it, doing his best to get it out of the stranger's grasp.] Give that back!

[ow_myface]

[and there's another masterful twirl dodge, he could dance with you ALL DAY SEVERUS!]

"The cold night air filled Snape's" Snape? There's a name for ya... "Er-hem, Snape's lungs as he raced through the forest as he searched fer the one person who he hadn't been able ta get outta his thoughts fer weeks~"

Ooh~ this next part is a saucy bit~♥

[jadedserpent]

GIVE THAT BACK!

[He lunges and tries to grab something, the wad of papers of the boy's arm, anything.]

Stop...reading...it! It's wrong!

[ow_myface]

And he finally found what he was lookin' for. He quickly raced inta the arms of his lover and embr-OW!

[And getting rather careless with his dodging, Snape's grabbing attempt landed him a handful of Shinji's hair. The vaizard's head snaps backward, and he's leaning back at a rather odd angle, probably should be falling over... but he somehow has managed to conquer physics in that regard]

Why hello there. Did you write this?

[and of course he just didn't know when to stop...]

[jadedserpent]

No! No, some stupid girl wrote it. Probably thought it would be funny. But it's not. So stop. Reading. It.

[ow_myface]

Yare, yare, yer a fussy one ain'tcha?

[He's still got his hands on the fanfic holding it hiiigh~ up in the air, even at his very awkward angle]

Y'sure I can't read it? I bet the ladies would like it~

[And the surrounding girls let out squeals in agreement]

[jadedserpent]

[Snape goes even more pale than usual.]

No! Don't read it! If you do...

[He pulls his wand out and points it straight in the boy's face.]

I'll curse you till you're crawling like a bug out of here.

[It's an empty threat, but he doesn't have to know that.]

[ow_myface]

[He snickers]

alright, alright, don't need ta get yer bloomers in a bunch.... Yer an uppity thing ain'tcha?

[He stands up somewhat normally, he's still slouching... and keeping the papers HIIGH~ out of reach]

But yannow... y'didn't say 'please'...

[jadedserpent]

[Snape grinds his teeth in frustration. This one is worse than annoying. He's almost like Potter, but without the maliciousness. But the two of them would get along well. That thought only fuels Snape's hatred and frustration.]

I don't have to. I'm warning you, don't.

[ow_myface]

Y'know, everytime I hear ya say "don't" it kinda makes me wanna do it~

[He sticks out his tongue and pulls down an eyelid to make a face at Snape in the most MATURE WAY POSSIBLE]

C'mon~ say please~

[jadedserpent]

[It goes against everything he believes in and against his instincts, but he really, really, doesn't want anyone else to hear the story. Even if it's just a bunch of stupid girls that he'll never see again after this horrible event. But he yield.]

Fine. Please. Now put it away.

[ow_myface]

[And with that Cheshire grin Shinji FINALLY complies lowering the hand with the fanfic, but not handing it over of course. Nooo~ this is GRAND leverage~]

So, if you got all uppity about that then yer name is either Sirius or Snape...

[jadedserpent]

[Snape attempts to master his facial expression. If he gives it up, this jerk will have more to use against him.]

It might be.

[He reaches out to snatch it from the boy's hand.]