On how Elena Gilbert has to go dark and why as a Damon/Elena shipper, I'm more than okay with that!
Not the most eloquent of titles, but the most accurate. First of all, let me say this post is mostly inspired by the lovely lit_chick08, whom I may or may not quote profusely. [Meg, I didn't ask permission, but I hope it's okay to use some of your post regarding this subject]. Second of all, TVD fandom, I love you, and I just want us all to get along, but differing opinions being what they are, I felt like the best way for me to handle all my ~feelings was just to pour them out here. Do with them what you will.
[I've never even watched Gilmore Girls, but this GIF was too perfect, right?]
So, after last night, I came out of my TVD buzz feeling a bit like this:
This has happened before, and I assume it will happen again, but it's just funny. I honestly thought I'd spend a lot more time defending Damon than I ever would Elena. So, first things first: I love Damon Salvatore. As in: Damon stan 4VR and favorite fictional character of all-time and how did this even happen L-O-V-E. When he's hurt, it hurts me. Actual pain afflicts my chest. When Damon does something that I can't find a reason for, or justification for, it literally spins my world around. I become ineffectual; I worry about why I'm worried about it. I begin to accept that I, too, may be a little crazy. But this post isn't really about that, except that it is. To defend Elena to some will feel like a betrayal of Damon, but I find that I must do it.
lit_chick08 explains it thusly:
Since our first glimpses of Katerina Petrova in 2x09 "Katerina" and 2x19 "Klaus," I have firmly maintained Katherine began life as a woman very much like Elena. She was sweet, naive, romantic, and trusting. It was not until learning of Klaus's plans and having to run for her life for 500 years she became the Katherine we know and love. To adapt to the insanity of her world, Katerina Petrova had to die and Katherine Pierce had to be born.
Now, don't get me wrong: I don't want Elena to become Katherine. I literally hate Katherine for what she did to Damon and Stefan (especially Damon, remember Damon Stan 4VR), but the truth is, Damon is a vampire; a murderous, somewhat amoral vampire. He's certainly come a long way since S1, and I salute the guy who, when his heart is shattered this time, merely beats up an immortal being, has a few drinks, and screws the brains out of another immortal being. The fact that nobody ended up permanently dead, or accidentally not dead **cough**Jeremy**cough** is a vast improvement for him.
But think about it for a moment: how many times has Damon hurt Elena, knowingly or unknowingly? This isn't about tit for tat, and I'm not suggesting it is, but what I am suggesting is that for them to ever get to the point where they can be viable romantic equals, there are going to have to be a few more black marks on Elena's side of things.
Back to lit_chick08:
We've already begun to see the unraveling of Elena's strict moral code from Season 1. She's manipulated Damon to get what she wanted in 2x03 "Bad Moon Rising", she pushed everything to the brink with Elijah in "The Dinner Party", she earned Rebekah's trust only to literally stab her in the back in 3x09 "Homecoming", had Jeremy compelled to Denver, and, in this episode, she both had Stefan break Damon's neck to get her way as well as betraying Elijah, whom she clearly considers to be a friend despite everything. We see Elena express disgust and shame for her actions, but she also knows it is what needs to be done in order to keep everyone safe. Elena is starting to learn that the ends do justify the means when everything is on the line, and, as Damon acknowledges during 3x09, Elena's actions have become "very Katherine."
I love everything Elena did this episode [3x14]. There is always a lot of debate online about Elena and her agency, and who takes her agency, and who is inhibiting her agency, and what I loved about this episode is this: Elena made every single important decision tonight, and she did it without any Salvatore input. What's more: she played Stefan and Damon off of each other in order to get what she wanted and she exploited the rivalry that's obvious between them now in order to do it. Romantic entanglements aside, Elena knows the brothers in the same way Katherine does, and she's done playing because playtime is over.
This is important for two reasons: Elena's survival (her being her own hero), and to asserting her independence (she doesn't have parents to break away from, just two vampire boyfriends, one of which would like very much to tuck her away into a cotton lock box while the other fritters away her ability to make her own decisions by acting like she's never almost got them all killed doing just that).
As a Damon/Elena shipper, I have written many a fanfic where I, through the course of the story, tamed Damon down to make him a viable partner for Elena. Part of that is the fun of the arc within a story, and the rest of it is the need for them to meet in the middle. But as S3 began, I really started to understand that Damon is as tame as he's ever going to get; he may still break his BFF's neck from time to time, and he'll most definitely think he knows what's best and stop at nothing to DO whatever that is, at whatever cost. So the ultimate truth is that Elena's journey into the gray is what will bring them together. She has done to Jeremy what Damon has done to her: taken a choice away out of love, accepted the wrong of it, and moved on, perhaps a bit regretful, but not remorseful in the way that she would undo what she did. There is no way she can claim that she doesn't understand what motivates Damon; she might claim she doesn't feel that way towards him, but we all know where this is leading. She's in love with both of the Salvatores, and a meta post about why Stefan isn't the brother for her has been covered elsewhere.
However, Damon doesn't become the brother for her entirely until we find out how far this character arc will go with Elena. As lit_chick08 says, She has not yet reached Katherine's "better you than me" philosophy, but, as things unravel, I think we could see her approach it. I personally think the thing that will separate Elena forever from Katherine will be this item: that she, like Damon, does everything for love, even bad things, even morally questionable things, even things that hurt those that she loves. In her own twisted way, she will be just what Stefan always wanted her to be: the perfect version of Katherine. Then, and only then, will she be the 'right' girl for Damon.
And to that end, I support this character arc entirely.
[I've never even watched Gilmore Girls, but this GIF was too perfect, right?]
So, after last night, I came out of my TVD buzz feeling a bit like this:
This has happened before, and I assume it will happen again, but it's just funny. I honestly thought I'd spend a lot more time defending Damon than I ever would Elena. So, first things first: I love Damon Salvatore. As in: Damon stan 4VR and favorite fictional character of all-time and how did this even happen L-O-V-E. When he's hurt, it hurts me. Actual pain afflicts my chest. When Damon does something that I can't find a reason for, or justification for, it literally spins my world around. I become ineffectual; I worry about why I'm worried about it. I begin to accept that I, too, may be a little crazy. But this post isn't really about that, except that it is. To defend Elena to some will feel like a betrayal of Damon, but I find that I must do it.
lit_chick08 explains it thusly:
Since our first glimpses of Katerina Petrova in 2x09 "Katerina" and 2x19 "Klaus," I have firmly maintained Katherine began life as a woman very much like Elena. She was sweet, naive, romantic, and trusting. It was not until learning of Klaus's plans and having to run for her life for 500 years she became the Katherine we know and love. To adapt to the insanity of her world, Katerina Petrova had to die and Katherine Pierce had to be born.
Now, don't get me wrong: I don't want Elena to become Katherine. I literally hate Katherine for what she did to Damon and Stefan (especially Damon, remember Damon Stan 4VR), but the truth is, Damon is a vampire; a murderous, somewhat amoral vampire. He's certainly come a long way since S1, and I salute the guy who, when his heart is shattered this time, merely beats up an immortal being, has a few drinks, and screws the brains out of another immortal being. The fact that nobody ended up permanently dead, or accidentally not dead **cough**Jeremy**cough** is a vast improvement for him.
But think about it for a moment: how many times has Damon hurt Elena, knowingly or unknowingly? This isn't about tit for tat, and I'm not suggesting it is, but what I am suggesting is that for them to ever get to the point where they can be viable romantic equals, there are going to have to be a few more black marks on Elena's side of things.
Back to lit_chick08:
We've already begun to see the unraveling of Elena's strict moral code from Season 1. She's manipulated Damon to get what she wanted in 2x03 "Bad Moon Rising", she pushed everything to the brink with Elijah in "The Dinner Party", she earned Rebekah's trust only to literally stab her in the back in 3x09 "Homecoming", had Jeremy compelled to Denver, and, in this episode, she both had Stefan break Damon's neck to get her way as well as betraying Elijah, whom she clearly considers to be a friend despite everything. We see Elena express disgust and shame for her actions, but she also knows it is what needs to be done in order to keep everyone safe. Elena is starting to learn that the ends do justify the means when everything is on the line, and, as Damon acknowledges during 3x09, Elena's actions have become "very Katherine."
I love everything Elena did this episode [3x14]. There is always a lot of debate online about Elena and her agency, and who takes her agency, and who is inhibiting her agency, and what I loved about this episode is this: Elena made every single important decision tonight, and she did it without any Salvatore input. What's more: she played Stefan and Damon off of each other in order to get what she wanted and she exploited the rivalry that's obvious between them now in order to do it. Romantic entanglements aside, Elena knows the brothers in the same way Katherine does, and she's done playing because playtime is over.
This is important for two reasons: Elena's survival (her being her own hero), and to asserting her independence (she doesn't have parents to break away from, just two vampire boyfriends, one of which would like very much to tuck her away into a cotton lock box while the other fritters away her ability to make her own decisions by acting like she's never almost got them all killed doing just that).
As a Damon/Elena shipper, I have written many a fanfic where I, through the course of the story, tamed Damon down to make him a viable partner for Elena. Part of that is the fun of the arc within a story, and the rest of it is the need for them to meet in the middle. But as S3 began, I really started to understand that Damon is as tame as he's ever going to get; he may still break his BFF's neck from time to time, and he'll most definitely think he knows what's best and stop at nothing to DO whatever that is, at whatever cost. So the ultimate truth is that Elena's journey into the gray is what will bring them together. She has done to Jeremy what Damon has done to her: taken a choice away out of love, accepted the wrong of it, and moved on, perhaps a bit regretful, but not remorseful in the way that she would undo what she did. There is no way she can claim that she doesn't understand what motivates Damon; she might claim she doesn't feel that way towards him, but we all know where this is leading. She's in love with both of the Salvatores, and a meta post about why Stefan isn't the brother for her has been covered elsewhere.
However, Damon doesn't become the brother for her entirely until we find out how far this character arc will go with Elena. As lit_chick08 says, She has not yet reached Katherine's "better you than me" philosophy, but, as things unravel, I think we could see her approach it. I personally think the thing that will separate Elena forever from Katherine will be this item: that she, like Damon, does everything for love, even bad things, even morally questionable things, even things that hurt those that she loves. In her own twisted way, she will be just what Stefan always wanted her to be: the perfect version of Katherine. Then, and only then, will she be the 'right' girl for Damon.
And to that end, I support this character arc entirely.