Frostedburger
Well here I am, back at Frostburg State University, the place I'm not sure if I hate or not. It was really hard for me to come back here yesterday, I was tired, I didnt feel good, and I was upset about something from my math class. The traffic was horrible, and what should have been about a three and a half hour drive wound up being almost 4 and a half. I got back after Cheasapeake Hall was done serving dinner, so I ended up getting McDonalds instead. I could have eaten somewhere else on campus with the meal credits from the meals I didnt eat there that day, but I didnt feel well enough to walk across campus, so I stopped at McDonalds before I even got to the university. I dont know whether its stress or just the food here, but it seems like I have a constantly upset stomach while Im here. It was gone while I was home for the weekend, so Im leaning towards the food here as the cause. I guess Im just going to have to keep eating the food until I build up an immunity.
Thankfully the only class I had today was Chemistry lab at 2pm, so I could sleep in and get the rest I needed. I felt mostly better when I got up for class, but apparently I still wasnt all there mentally because I walked off and forgot my safety goggle in my room. I got to class 10 minutes early and immediately realized I had forgotten them, so instead of being 10 minutes early I ended up being 5 minutes late after I ran clear across campus and back to retrieve them. The class itself was actually quite pleasant, but not for a reason that was good for many. Apparently a good number of students, i.e half the class, didnt do the required prelab on the website 'Moodle', so the professor told them all to leave. The class wasnt very large to begin with, so having half of them gone was like having the lab to myself. I like having labs to myself. Tommorow isnt going to be anywhere near as pleasant though. I have classes all day long, and none of them are classes I particularly enjoy. Dendrology is ok, but Ive been living in a sort of ongoing Dendrology class all summer through my work, so I really would like a break from it.
I never really stopped to think about it, but I really do miss everyone at home now. Last week wasnt so bad because I knew I would at least have a chance to possibly see people over the Labor Day weekend, but now I wont have a the possibility of seeing anyone at home for about a month unless something drastic happens. I was really happy that I got to see one person in particular twice before I left. They were the person I was most concerned I wasnt going to get to see because of various circumstances. In a way though Im also jealous of that person. I had a relative degree of happiness while I was home, but now that Im out here I really cant find much to be happy about other than the fact that I have internet access and a bed to sleep in. I may have said that people would be happier when I was gone, but Im not sure if I actually meant it. Hearing that people really are better off now that Im gone is really not a good feeling. Not only does it not feel good to know that you were a hinderance in someone's life, but having them gain from your lose doesnt seem fair. If they get to be happy, why dont I? I did the right thing by removing myself from the situation, didnt I? So why dont I even get the slightest bit of a reward?
Maybe I just need more time to find something to be happy about here, but so far things have only been getting worse. I feel like Im living my worst middle school years over again. Not having anyone to talk to anywhere, eating every meal by myself, just generally feeling looked down on by everyone around me. I mean, sometimes here at the end of the day, Ill cough or call someone on the phone, and the fact that I even made a sound startles me because it'll be the first noise Ive made all day. I know its stupid, but it bothers me that I dont have the SciFi Channel here. Watching that channel was one of the things at home that made me happy. I dont get my Ghost Hunters or my Stargate here. I guess that just makes it all the more enjoyable when I get to watch it at home.
Its getting late though, and I have a little bit of homework to do. Im probably going to dance a merry jig out to the lounge and do it in the air conditioning then toddle off to bed. I hope you all know that I miss you. Goodnight all.
Thankfully the only class I had today was Chemistry lab at 2pm, so I could sleep in and get the rest I needed. I felt mostly better when I got up for class, but apparently I still wasnt all there mentally because I walked off and forgot my safety goggle in my room. I got to class 10 minutes early and immediately realized I had forgotten them, so instead of being 10 minutes early I ended up being 5 minutes late after I ran clear across campus and back to retrieve them. The class itself was actually quite pleasant, but not for a reason that was good for many. Apparently a good number of students, i.e half the class, didnt do the required prelab on the website 'Moodle', so the professor told them all to leave. The class wasnt very large to begin with, so having half of them gone was like having the lab to myself. I like having labs to myself. Tommorow isnt going to be anywhere near as pleasant though. I have classes all day long, and none of them are classes I particularly enjoy. Dendrology is ok, but Ive been living in a sort of ongoing Dendrology class all summer through my work, so I really would like a break from it.
I never really stopped to think about it, but I really do miss everyone at home now. Last week wasnt so bad because I knew I would at least have a chance to possibly see people over the Labor Day weekend, but now I wont have a the possibility of seeing anyone at home for about a month unless something drastic happens. I was really happy that I got to see one person in particular twice before I left. They were the person I was most concerned I wasnt going to get to see because of various circumstances. In a way though Im also jealous of that person. I had a relative degree of happiness while I was home, but now that Im out here I really cant find much to be happy about other than the fact that I have internet access and a bed to sleep in. I may have said that people would be happier when I was gone, but Im not sure if I actually meant it. Hearing that people really are better off now that Im gone is really not a good feeling. Not only does it not feel good to know that you were a hinderance in someone's life, but having them gain from your lose doesnt seem fair. If they get to be happy, why dont I? I did the right thing by removing myself from the situation, didnt I? So why dont I even get the slightest bit of a reward?
Maybe I just need more time to find something to be happy about here, but so far things have only been getting worse. I feel like Im living my worst middle school years over again. Not having anyone to talk to anywhere, eating every meal by myself, just generally feeling looked down on by everyone around me. I mean, sometimes here at the end of the day, Ill cough or call someone on the phone, and the fact that I even made a sound startles me because it'll be the first noise Ive made all day. I know its stupid, but it bothers me that I dont have the SciFi Channel here. Watching that channel was one of the things at home that made me happy. I dont get my Ghost Hunters or my Stargate here. I guess that just makes it all the more enjoyable when I get to watch it at home.
Its getting late though, and I have a little bit of homework to do. Im probably going to dance a merry jig out to the lounge and do it in the air conditioning then toddle off to bed. I hope you all know that I miss you. Goodnight all.