NEX STOP: COLLEGE (and yes, epileptic text because that's always eye-catching)
No, really, the thought is terrifying.
Really, really terrifying.
It's kinda been a smooth blur up until now, just like France was surreal until about a week in and graduating was this quiet thing that passed for weeks before I realized that I actually was out of the public school system that had been my home for twelve years. It's all too weird. And, like, not in a bad way, but just in a way that startles me. Up until now, I was feeling totally indifferent about everything.
But I'm leaving in two days. And that changes things, doesn't it?
Like -- like the money situation. $ $ $ Like the fact I have a lot of financial aid (thank sweet Jesus and all the apostles), but just everything else that comes with it. Food? Clothes? Traveling? For fun? What do I do about insurance for the car? For -- for gas, for bills for ...and the list continues.
A new city, different people, possibly dating (eeek!) friendships, classes...I don't know. I'm a pretty adaptable person and can roll with just about everything, but the whole enormity of this scares me. Like, I could look at it as I did moving up to Wyoming my freshman year of high school but -- but it's not the same, you know? This is my career, here -- something I may be sticking with all my life.
Gah.
In other news:
I like the GLEE pilot. A little bit more than appropriate. I know people are already ripping into it but (as much as theatre/choir kids creep me the fuck out with their crazy SINGING DRAMA MADNESS all the time [and forgive me; I'm an orchestra/jazz band kid. We don't understand that stuff]), but it looks really fun. Even if everyone looks like they're in their twenties and and are waaaay too well dressed to be in any high school I attended.
BUT ANYWAY.
Yeah. Summers pass too fast. that adulthood-ish thing passes too fast.
My head hurts.
Really, really terrifying.
It's kinda been a smooth blur up until now, just like France was surreal until about a week in and graduating was this quiet thing that passed for weeks before I realized that I actually was out of the public school system that had been my home for twelve years. It's all too weird. And, like, not in a bad way, but just in a way that startles me. Up until now, I was feeling totally indifferent about everything.
But I'm leaving in two days. And that changes things, doesn't it?
Like -- like the money situation. $ $ $ Like the fact I have a lot of financial aid (thank sweet Jesus and all the apostles), but just everything else that comes with it. Food? Clothes? Traveling? For fun? What do I do about insurance for the car? For -- for gas, for bills for ...and the list continues.
A new city, different people, possibly dating (eeek!) friendships, classes...I don't know. I'm a pretty adaptable person and can roll with just about everything, but the whole enormity of this scares me. Like, I could look at it as I did moving up to Wyoming my freshman year of high school but -- but it's not the same, you know? This is my career, here -- something I may be sticking with all my life.
Gah.
In other news:
I like the GLEE pilot. A little bit more than appropriate. I know people are already ripping into it but (as much as theatre/choir kids creep me the fuck out with their crazy SINGING DRAMA MADNESS all the time [and forgive me; I'm an orchestra/jazz band kid. We don't understand that stuff]), but it looks really fun. Even if everyone looks like they're in their twenties and and are waaaay too well dressed to be in any high school I attended.
BUT ANYWAY.
Yeah. Summers pass too fast. that adulthood-ish thing passes too fast.
My head hurts.