giving up on love
I have come to the conclusion that Marcus no longer cares about me, nor did he ever care. I truly believe that he faked it the whole time we were together. But you see that's ok, it's not like this is the first time I've ever been hurt or broken hearted, I've been down that road many times before, and I've come out the other side just fine. ok maybe a little scared and bruised, but otherwise fine. Now, as far as my heart is concerned, well let's just say that I have given up on love, I have no use for it, and apparently it has no use for me either. I guess in a way I'm living my life the way I should have always lived it, single and alone with just my mother, maybe a cat/dog/fish/etc, and a nice warm home and a big tub, and a nice bottle of wine. I don't mine occasionally going out with my close friends,but as far as trying to find mr or ms right, that's not foreseeable in my future, nor is it "written in the stars" for me to ever be with anyone special for the rest of my life. so, I guess when I die, I'll have to leave whatever is left of my life to a few cousins and nieces and nephews.I really hope Marcus is happy with what he has done to me. and I hope he is happy with whoever he is with, maybe he's finally with Ejay, just like he wanted. oh, and I hope he realizes that it wasn't me who cause a lot of the problems, it was him and his best friend of all time...A good bottle of rum.