plans interrupted
I packed my bags yesterday and had everything ready to leave this afternoon for the city. We'd booked a hotel for the four of us for 2 nights, arranged to take the dog to a boarding kennel, booked my vehicle in to get a remote car starter in it tomorrow morning, packed a suitcase for the girls and then....the phone rang this morning. My mom called to say that my dad passed away this morning. I literally crumpled into a big soggy mess on our bedroom floor while Jack knelt beside me and rubbed my back - he didn't even know who was on the phone or what the horrible news was yet. I eventually handed the phone to him and went to the bathroom to gag and throw up which often happens when I'm really upset and crying. Jack talked to my mom for a few minutes, told the girls about Grandpa dying, and came to check on me in the bathroom. Just as I was thinking about how cold and naked I was feeling, he brought in my fleece robe.
Jack has shed tears this morning too; he knew my dad and was friends with him even before he met me. Our courtship spanned an entire summer in 1986 that I spent working in my dad's laundromat & arcade business with Jack hanging out there with me around the clock. Whenever we could, we went for a walk together, and we were standing outside that building when we had our first kiss. A local reporter did a newspaper article about my midwifery journey and the status of midwifery in our province; it was published in our local paper this week and this morning I found out that it was also picked up by a newspaper in our nearest city. Jack was planning to take that article and read it to my dad this week :-/
My SIL told my FIL (who is in the same nursing home as my dad was) and my FIL asked where my dad had been living o-O His dementia/memory loss seems to be getting worse.
The girls went to school after shedding a few tears, we cancelled all of our appointments and plans to go to the city for the weekend, I fired off an email to my program director and called my manager in the city about postponing my clerkship start date. Everyone has been very understanding and I will be able to start in a week and a half to two weeks. Family members arrive Tuesday afternoon, the funeral is Thursday, and we'll take family back to the airport on Sunday. In the meantime, Jack and I went to one of the local funeral homes for the second time this year as we provided information, chose a memorial book, browsed a room full of empty caskets, and made a very long list of Things To Do. I sent a list of things to my mom to discuss with my brother and sister; they can help make some decisions while Jack and I do the legwork this week.
Although the timing isn't great in relation to my clerkship, it's good that I wasn't in Toronto getting this news, and also that Jack has just started his week off of work. As always, he's been strong and comforting, helpful and thoughtful. I'm so blessed to have this man in my life.
At one point today as we were contemplating the multitude of things to do and decisions to make for the funeral (and for my clerkship, still) I said to Jack, "Well, if I wasn't overwhelmed before, I sure am now." Thankfully the feeling of overwhelm will pass and things will get done. They always do.
Jack has shed tears this morning too; he knew my dad and was friends with him even before he met me. Our courtship spanned an entire summer in 1986 that I spent working in my dad's laundromat & arcade business with Jack hanging out there with me around the clock. Whenever we could, we went for a walk together, and we were standing outside that building when we had our first kiss. A local reporter did a newspaper article about my midwifery journey and the status of midwifery in our province; it was published in our local paper this week and this morning I found out that it was also picked up by a newspaper in our nearest city. Jack was planning to take that article and read it to my dad this week :-/
My SIL told my FIL (who is in the same nursing home as my dad was) and my FIL asked where my dad had been living o-O His dementia/memory loss seems to be getting worse.
The girls went to school after shedding a few tears, we cancelled all of our appointments and plans to go to the city for the weekend, I fired off an email to my program director and called my manager in the city about postponing my clerkship start date. Everyone has been very understanding and I will be able to start in a week and a half to two weeks. Family members arrive Tuesday afternoon, the funeral is Thursday, and we'll take family back to the airport on Sunday. In the meantime, Jack and I went to one of the local funeral homes for the second time this year as we provided information, chose a memorial book, browsed a room full of empty caskets, and made a very long list of Things To Do. I sent a list of things to my mom to discuss with my brother and sister; they can help make some decisions while Jack and I do the legwork this week.
Although the timing isn't great in relation to my clerkship, it's good that I wasn't in Toronto getting this news, and also that Jack has just started his week off of work. As always, he's been strong and comforting, helpful and thoughtful. I'm so blessed to have this man in my life.
At one point today as we were contemplating the multitude of things to do and decisions to make for the funeral (and for my clerkship, still) I said to Jack, "Well, if I wasn't overwhelmed before, I sure am now." Thankfully the feeling of overwhelm will pass and things will get done. They always do.