Having doner kebabs delivered to your front door is either the pinnacle of human achievement or the beginning of the end.

The man in the kebab shop fancies my mother. He was extremely friendly when I walked in. The 'someone wants to be your new Daddy' kind of friendly. He even sent me out to the car with some chicken kebab to keep her sustained whilst I waited in the queue. It was all very weird. Still, I got free chips out of the deal so it ain't all bad.