oh my fkin gawd.
okay, so I haven't updated in a looooong time. So long in fact. Pete and I broke up. I went out with his friend Trent without him knowing, for about two months, broke up with Trent, but are still good friends.
Single and carefree again. Yet to get back in the game. Can't wait! Only two months to go till i'm an adult. Yet even if i turn 18. I still, mentally, won't be an adult.
Am now graduated from the college with a certificate II in make-up services and retail services.
Working at dominos still but other than that twice a week work, I'm unemployed. Bored out of my brains. Completely uninspired. Depressed and lacking ambition.
I ran into ten people i knew today, at indooroopilly, within the time span of an hour.
Alana summons, Emma siepen, cameron king, stephanie roberts, scott banks, brock (nikki Ds bro), nadine schmoll, mitchell edwards, joel brilliant and some other person who i have forgotten.
though i didnt speak to mitchell and joel. i dont usually talk to them. i think if i were to count how many words i have exchanged with them of the entirety of my knowing them, it would be less than fifty.
I hate running into people I know. First of all, it reminds me of all those people I knew, and left behind. Reminds me of my past. I don't like looking back. And then theres the awkwardness of 'should i say hi to them, or should i just walk past as if i havent seen them'.
It's annoying. I hate living on the west-side. And yet. now i'm just used to it. im indifferent.
I've become used to dealing with the old shit.
All the new things freak me out though. Like, meeting new people, finding a job, dealing with all the new things that life brings. and yet. im indifferent. I've stopped caring. Hence I am in the ditch where i am. Too scared to get out, in fear of dragging myself further down, and at the same time, too happy where i am. Doing nothing.
as the song by pink floyd says: "I have become, comfortably numb."
I think that's what I am right now.
And as you can see my depressive tendancies haven't dissappeared. I'll get over it in the morning. cos by then I'll just forget.
Single and carefree again. Yet to get back in the game. Can't wait! Only two months to go till i'm an adult. Yet even if i turn 18. I still, mentally, won't be an adult.
Am now graduated from the college with a certificate II in make-up services and retail services.
Working at dominos still but other than that twice a week work, I'm unemployed. Bored out of my brains. Completely uninspired. Depressed and lacking ambition.
I ran into ten people i knew today, at indooroopilly, within the time span of an hour.
Alana summons, Emma siepen, cameron king, stephanie roberts, scott banks, brock (nikki Ds bro), nadine schmoll, mitchell edwards, joel brilliant and some other person who i have forgotten.
though i didnt speak to mitchell and joel. i dont usually talk to them. i think if i were to count how many words i have exchanged with them of the entirety of my knowing them, it would be less than fifty.
I hate running into people I know. First of all, it reminds me of all those people I knew, and left behind. Reminds me of my past. I don't like looking back. And then theres the awkwardness of 'should i say hi to them, or should i just walk past as if i havent seen them'.
It's annoying. I hate living on the west-side. And yet. now i'm just used to it. im indifferent.
I've become used to dealing with the old shit.
All the new things freak me out though. Like, meeting new people, finding a job, dealing with all the new things that life brings. and yet. im indifferent. I've stopped caring. Hence I am in the ditch where i am. Too scared to get out, in fear of dragging myself further down, and at the same time, too happy where i am. Doing nothing.
as the song by pink floyd says: "I have become, comfortably numb."
I think that's what I am right now.
And as you can see my depressive tendancies haven't dissappeared. I'll get over it in the morning. cos by then I'll just forget.