Last Night
I hate to do this, but I need to get this out, and I'm not ready for everyone to know what happened yet.
\\Firewall Against Slayers and Scoobies//
When I opened the door and saw her standing there, I didn't know what to say. I was surprised, to say the least. I was happy to see her, happy that she was finally coming to me, was ready to talk to me. But a part of me just wanted to slam the door in her face, for taking so long, for putting me through all of this. *bitter laugh* Should've trusted my instincts.
When I'd recovered from my shock, I invited her in, offered her a seat, something to drink. She didn't sit. I took a couple of steps back as she approached. Something in her demeanor, the way she was moving, the empty look in her eyes, set me on alert. But then I pushed it away; it was ridiculous, to be afraid of her. It's not like she was there to attack me or anything, right?
She kissed me, but I pulled away. I told her that this wasn't going to solve anything, that we needed to talk. She didn't want to talk. She kissed me again. I grabbed her shoulders and held her away from me, determined to make her talk to me. She just looked at my hands on her, and laughed. Then she threw me against the wall.
She started kissing me again, if you can call it that. Traditionally speaking, kissing doesn't draw blood. She started talking, crazy things, about how powerful she is, how she's the one in control and no one has power over her. She wasn't making any sense. And she wasn't letting up on her... aggression, either.
Somehow, I don't know how, I managed to shove her off of me and told her to get the hell out. She laughed again, asked me how I was going to make her do anything. Her voice was so hollow, and for the first time since she'd started this I wasn't angry. I was afraid. I know she has the physical strength to break me in half and the look in her eyes, I didn't see anything holding her back. So I did the only thing I could, I threatened to make enough noise to bring a house full of Slayers down on her. That seemed to get through to her. She ran out.
I don't know what to make of all this. I know about her past, but she's not that person anymore. I know she isn't. So why'd she do it? What's happened to make her think...
I don't know. I thought that getting this all out, written down, that somehow it would help, help make sense of things. But it hasn't. Maybe I should just talk to someone. Someone who knew her before. Maybe they could help me to understand; help me to figure out what could have happened, what could have set her off, to bring her to this.
\\End Firewall//
\\Firewall Against Slayers and Scoobies//
When I opened the door and saw her standing there, I didn't know what to say. I was surprised, to say the least. I was happy to see her, happy that she was finally coming to me, was ready to talk to me. But a part of me just wanted to slam the door in her face, for taking so long, for putting me through all of this. *bitter laugh* Should've trusted my instincts.
When I'd recovered from my shock, I invited her in, offered her a seat, something to drink. She didn't sit. I took a couple of steps back as she approached. Something in her demeanor, the way she was moving, the empty look in her eyes, set me on alert. But then I pushed it away; it was ridiculous, to be afraid of her. It's not like she was there to attack me or anything, right?
She kissed me, but I pulled away. I told her that this wasn't going to solve anything, that we needed to talk. She didn't want to talk. She kissed me again. I grabbed her shoulders and held her away from me, determined to make her talk to me. She just looked at my hands on her, and laughed. Then she threw me against the wall.
She started kissing me again, if you can call it that. Traditionally speaking, kissing doesn't draw blood. She started talking, crazy things, about how powerful she is, how she's the one in control and no one has power over her. She wasn't making any sense. And she wasn't letting up on her... aggression, either.
Somehow, I don't know how, I managed to shove her off of me and told her to get the hell out. She laughed again, asked me how I was going to make her do anything. Her voice was so hollow, and for the first time since she'd started this I wasn't angry. I was afraid. I know she has the physical strength to break me in half and the look in her eyes, I didn't see anything holding her back. So I did the only thing I could, I threatened to make enough noise to bring a house full of Slayers down on her. That seemed to get through to her. She ran out.
I don't know what to make of all this. I know about her past, but she's not that person anymore. I know she isn't. So why'd she do it? What's happened to make her think...
I don't know. I thought that getting this all out, written down, that somehow it would help, help make sense of things. But it hasn't. Maybe I should just talk to someone. Someone who knew her before. Maybe they could help me to understand; help me to figure out what could have happened, what could have set her off, to bring her to this.
\\End Firewall//