(no subject)
I can't help to feel hurt and disappointed when two people I thought I was friends with don't invite me to their birthday parties, one in particular, given that their facebook statuses are screaming about it. I guess you never know where you stand. I am not a very extraverted person, I don't have many friends, that along ones I spend time out with. I wouldn't say I am that depressed these days but I spend most of my time at home, since I only work once a week and am on school holidays (the future of which still hangs in the balance). The last two months have been a little weird, in that least half the time I have enjoyed my isolation, it was sort of like I was wrapped up in a protective numbing blanket, insulated from emotions - a nice side effect of too many SSRIs. I hate to say it but I think I am returning to my old antisocial roots that had plaqued the second half of my teens, eventually leading to so much distrust in the human race that it had literally rendered me mute to others and gave me a nervous breakdown that started this whole chemical trip.
I hate this feeling of acutally wanting to be around people right now knowing that it is not at all possible, I was so glad to have that urge quietened, it's amazing what a couple of rejections can do to you.
I hate this feeling of acutally wanting to be around people right now knowing that it is not at all possible, I was so glad to have that urge quietened, it's amazing what a couple of rejections can do to you.