What the hell?
I try to be the best friend i can be, supportive when I'm asked, ready to listen when needed, up for hanging out whenever my schedule permits. Why is it, then, that when I give so much to the people that I think are my friends, they don't seem to give a damn about me? As Maid of Honor, whenever I was asked to do something, I did it. I attended all but 1 bridal shower, I threw a very nice shower, I ran around like crazy on the day of the wedding trying to make certain that the bride didn't need anything or worry about anything, and there were a dozen or more other things I did to be supportive and on board with the wedding. When another friend's grandmother died suddenly early this year, I went to the funeral home for the wake and I was the only friend who was at the funeral and I stayed for the burial and was there to lean on.
I know it sounds cliché, but I'm right now feeling like I give and I give and I get nothing, NOTHING in return. The woman I thought was my best friend and who is supposed to be my Matron of Honor seems to have shut down from me and has become very cold and CRAZY conservative, and therefore very disapproving of my more liberal views. My other bridesmaid can't seem to find the time to generally return my facebook messages, let alone my phone calls, and don't even THINK about actually even spending any time with me. That is right out. I've gotten so many rain checks from her, you'd think it was the flood from Noah's time. Here's the real kicker though, the two of them go to Mass together (them and their menfolk) and hang out fairly regularly. Do they think to give me a call or include me? Of COURSE not.
I'm feeling utterly abandoned by the people I thought were my good friends, and they don't seem to give a damn that I'm getting married in just under six months, and they are supposed to be in the bridal party. They're supposed to be the ones getting excited with me, but I'm apparently not worth their time. Oh yeah, and the bridesmaid? She's the one who has scheduled her wedding 2 weeks before mine.
I have tried so hard through the entire wedding planning process so far to not be a bridezilla, to not be all "me, me, me" and try and act like I'm a princess and everyone should cowtow to my will, etc. but dammit, every so often, I want to feel like the bride-to-be, I want people to ask about the wedding and get excited with me and for me. It's been a battle with my father practically every step of the way, and this is just adding to the stress. It's almost gotten to the point where I want to sit down with my current Matron of Honor and bridesmaid and ask them if they would rather not be in the bridal party. I feel like I'd almost be letting them off the hook. The only problem is that I'd feel more abandoned than ever if they said that they didn't, in fact, want to be a part of the wedding.
I can't even try and turn to a different group of friends because the few other people I'd be able to turn to are at least 4 hours and a time zone away. I don't even have a place to go to try and make new friends to lean on because my work schedule is so inconsistant and I don't have a steady time every week to join an organization and I don't really have the money to go out, and my house is not even halfway finished and it's really small so I can't even really invite people over.
I feel so alone.
I know it sounds cliché, but I'm right now feeling like I give and I give and I get nothing, NOTHING in return. The woman I thought was my best friend and who is supposed to be my Matron of Honor seems to have shut down from me and has become very cold and CRAZY conservative, and therefore very disapproving of my more liberal views. My other bridesmaid can't seem to find the time to generally return my facebook messages, let alone my phone calls, and don't even THINK about actually even spending any time with me. That is right out. I've gotten so many rain checks from her, you'd think it was the flood from Noah's time. Here's the real kicker though, the two of them go to Mass together (them and their menfolk) and hang out fairly regularly. Do they think to give me a call or include me? Of COURSE not.
I'm feeling utterly abandoned by the people I thought were my good friends, and they don't seem to give a damn that I'm getting married in just under six months, and they are supposed to be in the bridal party. They're supposed to be the ones getting excited with me, but I'm apparently not worth their time. Oh yeah, and the bridesmaid? She's the one who has scheduled her wedding 2 weeks before mine.
I have tried so hard through the entire wedding planning process so far to not be a bridezilla, to not be all "me, me, me" and try and act like I'm a princess and everyone should cowtow to my will, etc. but dammit, every so often, I want to feel like the bride-to-be, I want people to ask about the wedding and get excited with me and for me. It's been a battle with my father practically every step of the way, and this is just adding to the stress. It's almost gotten to the point where I want to sit down with my current Matron of Honor and bridesmaid and ask them if they would rather not be in the bridal party. I feel like I'd almost be letting them off the hook. The only problem is that I'd feel more abandoned than ever if they said that they didn't, in fact, want to be a part of the wedding.
I can't even try and turn to a different group of friends because the few other people I'd be able to turn to are at least 4 hours and a time zone away. I don't even have a place to go to try and make new friends to lean on because my work schedule is so inconsistant and I don't have a steady time every week to join an organization and I don't really have the money to go out, and my house is not even halfway finished and it's really small so I can't even really invite people over.
I feel so alone.