saturday funk
So... here I am, saturday, blew off most of the day because I did not get up till late after going out to start the new 40k campaign last night.
now... First off, I did not really have a good time last night. I'd have been much better off if I had gone over to see Josh and Cabrini even though Demaris did not show because i'd have been social. Even yet still better if i'd managed to get to Ceder's for dinner with Josh, Cabrini, Gabe, Mare, and whoever else showed. But nevermind all that, I was commited to showing up almost a month ago. I think i'm going to have to not get into the campaigns any more as it already feels like work to show up all the time. Vince likely has the right idea about just showing up when he feels like it. I have a hard time working against my established behavior patterns. But if we don't change we do the same stupid crap over and over and...
So... Today I got up late, which is okay because i'm not getting enough sleep lately and need to start doing that, even if I only do it for two days on the weekend. Watched "Hitch" which was funny... but killed another few hours. I have to go into town to feed Angela's cats and I have now talked to my friend Jim from work and told him i'll be going to the Merc tonight... so i'm kind of commited there, which is also alright because I wanted to go to see Amber and likely Ethan as well.
This is more like a laundry list of I did this, then came that, than I had in mind. My point when I started all this is that I don't think I want to have "set" things that are obligations on the weekend, but that I really need to get rest and get out and do something to take care of myself. Because of some recent feedback to my posts I feel compelled to say that i'm not looking for you to tell me "duh... dork" or such like. I'm writing a freakin journal which is mostly for myself. Don't get me wrong however, i'm gratefull for having the experience because it brings to mind the fact that you really need to ask for what you want AND tell people how NOT to meet your needs. Women get accused of not asking or not telling people how to not do it all the time. Great... another way i'm girly.
Speaking of being girly... I seem incapable of watching movies like hitch without doing a tremendous amount of "hmm... crap I really need to get Darla to put up or shut up and move on with my life" (again, if you say something like "duh" i'll simply get irritated) but I think i'm being girly in that i've never really felt irrationally totally enraptured by a girl before... nope... really, not ever.
but... i've got to adapt, deal, and get over it if it won't happen because I deserve better. (I swear i'll bite you till you bleed if you say anything snarky about this)
hmm...done with my loosely structured post of the day, think i'll lock it for not so obvious reasons
p.s. hope to see whoever at the Merc tonight, we plan on going by like 10:30 i think
now... First off, I did not really have a good time last night. I'd have been much better off if I had gone over to see Josh and Cabrini even though Demaris did not show because i'd have been social. Even yet still better if i'd managed to get to Ceder's for dinner with Josh, Cabrini, Gabe, Mare, and whoever else showed. But nevermind all that, I was commited to showing up almost a month ago. I think i'm going to have to not get into the campaigns any more as it already feels like work to show up all the time. Vince likely has the right idea about just showing up when he feels like it. I have a hard time working against my established behavior patterns. But if we don't change we do the same stupid crap over and over and...
So... Today I got up late, which is okay because i'm not getting enough sleep lately and need to start doing that, even if I only do it for two days on the weekend. Watched "Hitch" which was funny... but killed another few hours. I have to go into town to feed Angela's cats and I have now talked to my friend Jim from work and told him i'll be going to the Merc tonight... so i'm kind of commited there, which is also alright because I wanted to go to see Amber and likely Ethan as well.
This is more like a laundry list of I did this, then came that, than I had in mind. My point when I started all this is that I don't think I want to have "set" things that are obligations on the weekend, but that I really need to get rest and get out and do something to take care of myself. Because of some recent feedback to my posts I feel compelled to say that i'm not looking for you to tell me "duh... dork" or such like. I'm writing a freakin journal which is mostly for myself. Don't get me wrong however, i'm gratefull for having the experience because it brings to mind the fact that you really need to ask for what you want AND tell people how NOT to meet your needs. Women get accused of not asking or not telling people how to not do it all the time. Great... another way i'm girly.
Speaking of being girly... I seem incapable of watching movies like hitch without doing a tremendous amount of "hmm... crap I really need to get Darla to put up or shut up and move on with my life" (again, if you say something like "duh" i'll simply get irritated) but I think i'm being girly in that i've never really felt irrationally totally enraptured by a girl before... nope... really, not ever.
but... i've got to adapt, deal, and get over it if it won't happen because I deserve better. (I swear i'll bite you till you bleed if you say anything snarky about this)
hmm...done with my loosely structured post of the day, think i'll lock it for not so obvious reasons
p.s. hope to see whoever at the Merc tonight, we plan on going by like 10:30 i think