Not Quite Paradise
Title: Not Quite Paradise
Author: athenaktt
Pairing: John/Elizabeth friendship
Rating: Everyone
Spoilers: 3x10 "The Return - Part I", Story takes place during "The Return - Part I". Mention of SG-1, 10x05 "Uninvited".
Summary: This is a short fic that is mostly Elizabeth's POV during her six weeks back home.
A/N: Thanks to mizz_magenta for beta-ing. ;)
Click here for Fanfiction.net version
Not Quite Paradise
Numbness washed over Elizabeth as she stood in the gateroom watching the Ancients sitting behind the control consoles in the control room above. Atlantis was returned to its rightful owners. She glanced around at the somber faces of her expedition team as they exchanged their farewells to each other. Everything around her was happening too quickly, while her numb body moved too slowly.
"Rodney," she called more from instinct than from the urgency to leave.
Rodney collected his things and headed down into the gateroom with the rest of the team. He quickly said goodbye to Ronon and Teyla, and started for the gate after John and Carson.
Elizabeth's numb body turned around and started to follow the group through the gate, but she stopped and took one last look around the room. Her memories of Atlantis in the last couple of years came flooding back to her. She silently sighed to herself and stepped into the event horizon.
"Welcome home, Doctor Weir," General Hank Landry said as Elizabeth stepped onto the ramp in the Stargate Command gateroom.
"Thank you, General. It's good to be back," Elizabeth said, concealing the pang she felt in her heart.
The room bustled with Atlantis expedition members continuing their goodbyes before they all moved onto another life. Another life...
Elizabeth did not want another life. She was happy with the life she had. How could she ever go back to her previous life? John was right. She had peaked. Everything was downhill from here.
"Doctor Weir," Landry's voice interrupted her thoughts. "After you and your people are cleared by our doctors, and you have completed your debriefings, you're free to go."
"Yes, sir," she said absentmindedly and followed the others out of the gateroom.
After the SGC doctors cleared her as healthy, Elizabeth went straight to her guest quarters and only made an appearance at briefings when it was required. Her body was still numb as she sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the wall. A knock on door the startled her, it was probably Sergeant Walter Harriman telling her that her transportation home was ready.
She sighed and reluctantly moved across the room to open the door.
"John?" Seeing John at her door surprised her, which was unusual since in Atlantis John often knocked at her door to bring her reports and status updates.
"How are you? Are you all right?" he asked closing the door behind him.
"I'm fine, John."
"Are you sure?" he asked doubtfully.
"I just-"
"Miss Atlantis?" John supplied.
"Yes," she admitted. "I know it's silly. We were only in Atlantis for a couple years. I've practically spent my whole life here on Earth. I never..."
"You never thought you'd get so attached to Atlantis," he finished. "If it makes you feel any better, I miss Atlantis too."
"I can't believe it's over." Her voice was a near whisper.
"I know," he said softly. He observed Elizabeth's posture. Her eyes were cast down on the floor. He knew she was not okay, but he decided it was best not to push her. "Um, Rodney and Radek are about to head to the airport. I thought maybe you'd want to say goodbye."
"Yes," she said, looking up at John. "Of course. Thank you."
"Come on." John held open the door for her and they headed towards the elevators.
"Take care, Rodney," Elizabeth said after hugging him goodbye.
"Thanks," Rodney said gathering his luggage. "Do you know what you are going to do now?"
"No," she shook her head, "not yet."
"Why not?" he asked after getting a handle of his luggage. "I'm sure everyone wants you to work for them."
"Not everyone," she said pursing her lips together.
"Everyone on Earth," he amended.
"I was thinking of taking a vacation break."
"A vacation is good," he nodded. "If you need anything, call Sheppard." John made a face at Rodney. "What? It's logical. I'm obviously too far to be any use to Elizabeth, and you're more fit for grunt work than Carson."
Elizabeth smiled. She was going to miss this. "Thank you, Rodney." She moved over to Radek and gave him a quick hug. "All the best, teaching in Masaryk, Radek. Měj śe."
"Goodbye, Elizabeth. Take care," Radek said.
As Elizabeth and Carson said their farewells to Radek, John gave Rodney a firm handshake. "Take care, Rodney. Don't blow up anymore solar systems."
"It was uninhabited!" Rodney resisted dropping his bag on John's toes. "Anyways, take care. And take care of her, okay?" Rodney glanced at Elizabeth, who was still chatting with Radek. "She seems well, but we all know it's hitting her hard."
"I know," John agreed. Radek and Elizabeth had finished chatting. "Well... have a good flight, you two," John said shaking Radek's hand.
"We'll be in touch, right?" Rodney asked Elizabeth.
"Of course," she nodded.
She watched Rodney and Radek get into their shuttle to the airport. It was really happening. They were back from Atlantis and going their separate ways. Moving on.
"So," John said, starting to walk back into the SGC after Carson, who went ahead of them to hide his moist eyes. "A vacation, you say? Lucky you. I think Landry is going to send me of off-world tomorrow."
"But you just got back."
"I told you a lot of people in the Air Force don't really like me," he shrugged.
"You're going to be fine, John," she assured him.
"Are you?"
They stopped walking and John looked into her green eyes. She wanted to say "no", but instead she lied.
"Yes."
John knew she was lying, and she knew he knew.
"Really, I'll be fine." She gave him a feeble smile.
"You don't need to convince me, Elizabeth."
He was right. She did not need to convince him that she would be all right. She needed to convince herself it was over and to move on. But she did not want to move on. Not yet.
"So do you need any help with your luggage?"
"No," she shook her head. "I put most of my stuff on the Daedalus. I don't have much stuff with me, but thanks for offering."
"I'm just doing my duty as your grunt."
"You mean my Lieutenant Colonel Grunt?" she said tilting her head and smiled.
"Actually, I'm your Lieutenant Colonel Errand Boy/Grunt."
"Not anymore, John." Elizabeth's smile faded. "I'm not your boss anymore."
"For what it's worth, you've been the best boss I've had so far."
"Thank you, John."
"Now seriously, if you need anything, call me."
Elizabeth nodded as they entered the elevator to head back underground.
The ring of the phone broke her dreamless sleep. She wanted to ignore the phone, but it could have been NORAD. She reached her hand out blindly to pick up the phone, but the answering machine beat her to it.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
"Elizabeth, it's Rodney. I tried calling your cell phone, but you didn't pick up so I figured you'd be home. I guess your not, because if you were, you'd pick up your phone, right? I just called to see how you are settling in. Granted, it's only been a week since we've been back, so you're probably still getting things together. Anyways I just called to see how you are doing. I tried talking to Carson, but with the Ori wreaking havoc all over the galaxy, he's been busy at the SGC. Sheppard is always off-world, and you're not home... so I have no one to talk to... Uh... so call me. I don't mind taking a break from my busy schedule to chat, unlike some people. Bye."
Beep.
Rodney said that they had been back for only a week. Was it only a week? It felt longer to her. It sounded as though everyone had moved on. Rodney was busily working on a project in Area 51. Carson and John were both being kept busy at Stargate Command. And she was lying in bed still waiting to move on. She forced herself out of bed and trudged into the bathroom. She looked at her reflection in the mirror. She looked well rested, but she still felt lost. But how else would she feel? She had left paradise to come home. Even though she belonged on Earth, it was not quite paradise.
She had thought about flying to Washington D.C. to visit her mother. Her mother always had a way of comforting her. Even in a nanite induced hallucination, her "mother" eased her pain just by a simple touch and smile. Not to mention Sedge, she was always her best companion. It was funny to think that when the nanites were trying to convince her Atlantis did not exist; they conjured up the two things that comforted her to help her forget Atlantis. Of course, she could not forget Atlantis, and that was, thankfully, only a nightmare. This was different. This was real. She could not wake up from this dream and find herself back in Atlantis.
Each night she would wake up to the car alarms, traffic, noisy neighbors, and sometimes silence. She missed the soothing sound of the ocean that surrounded Atlantis. She missed looking out the windows towards the magnificent spires of the city. She missed Atlantis. She missed her home. Her paradise.
She splashed cold water on her face over and over again hoping that she could wake up from this dream, but like every morning she was faced with reality. In time she would have to move on. She pulled a towel off the rack and dried her face. In the mirror, her reflection looked back at her telling her she was still not ready to move on. But from Rodney's message, everyone had moved on with their lives while she lingered behind grasping on to her memories of Atlantis. She needed to find a way to hold onto her memories. She exited her bathroom and found a notebook on her desk. She grabbed and pen and decided she would write down her experiences in Atlantis. Get everything straight in her head. The three years went by so quickly. Too quickly.
She blinked back her tears and sat down in her sofa, deciding to start at the beginning. She recounted the day she received word she would be leading an international team of scientists to the lost city of Atlantis. Then she remembered flying down to Antarctica to the Ancient outpost. She remembered her excitement when Doctor Daniel Jackson told her they could actually go to the lost city. On that same day, she remembered meeting, John Sheppard, at the time a Major, who unwittingly commanded the Ancient outpost chair with his mere thoughts. The first weeks of preparation were hectic. She could not wait to find Atlantis, and when she arrived at Atlantis she knew she never wanted to leave even though they were constantly threatened by the Wraith, enemy races, and most recently, Replicators. She fell in love with the city the moment she set foot in it; and leaving it forever broke her heart. Elizabeth felt her throat knot up again. She had decided that since she was not going to moving on. She would continue to lose herself in the past. When she was ready, she would move on... but not now. Not yet.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
"Hello Elizabeth, its Carson. I'm just calling to see how you are doing. Rodney said he tried to call you several times and you never returned his calls. He's convinced that you're angry at him and won't answer any of his calls, so he pestered me into calling you. Not that I needed to be pestered, I've been meaning to call you and see how you are doing. You're probably busy. I heard you have been in and out of Stargate Command a couple times last week to meet with the IOA. Next time you're in the SGC, stop by the infirmary. I'd love to have lunch or dinner with you. I'm sure John would like to see you too. You have my number so call me. Goodbye.
Beep.
Elizabeth eyed the blinking red light on her answering machine and smiled to herself. It was nice to have friends who cared about her. But she still didn't feel like seeing any of them. Why, she did not know. They all seemed to be dealing with the change well. Too well. They had all moved on with their lives and continued working like they had never left the galaxy. She was back for nearly three weeks, and she still could not stop thinking about standing outside on the balcony watching the sun rising and setting. Watching and listening to the rippling ocean waves, breathing in the fresh air, and feeling the wind on her face. All those things were not the same here.
She closed her eyes and sighed. She knew why she avoided her friends. She was afraid that being around them would obligate her to move on with her life as well. Each time she went to the SGC, she went out of her way to avoid running into John or Carson. It was easy enough to avoid both men. John was usually off-world, and Carson was usually in the infirmary. Elizabeth felt bad for avoiding them, but she promised herself she would see them when she was ready. But right now she was not ready, and she began to wonder if she ever would be.
The phone rang again and startled her. She let out a breath and let the phone ring again. She assumed it was Rodney, since he tried to call her at least twice every other day to give an update of his research and how he missed having Zelenka as a working partner. Though he never said those exact words, Elizabeth knew what Rodney was thinking.
She sighed and continued staring at the crossword puzzle in her lap. She wanted to continue writing her memoirs, but the daily crossword puzzle got her attention instead.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
Elizabeth looked up from her crossword when there was a silence after the beep. Maybe it was not Rodney. If it was not Rodney, who else would be calling her?
"Elizabeth?"
"John?" She said out loud to herself.
In the last three weeks, John had not called her once. At least she didn't remember him calling her. She had a few unidentified calls on her cell, but assumed they were the wrong number.
"Uh... It's John. Sorry, I didn't call you sooner. I figured with Rodney and Carson tag team calling you, you didn't need another person to add to the mix. Rodney is convinced that you hate him. But I know you probably just want some more time to yourself. Uh, the reason I'm calling you is because the Daedalus arrived today and our things are finally here. You'd think that with a new ZPM, we wouldn't have to wait nearly three weeks for our stuff, but they want to conserve the ZPM for emergencies. So three weeks delivery time it is. Well, if you need help in bringing some stuff to your place, I'd be glad to help... unless some Ori Prior decides to take my soul in my next mission. Then you'll have to get Beckett to help you. Hope you are enjoying your vacation. Talk to you soon. Bye."
Beep.
Without thinking, she pressed the replay button and listened to John's voice again. Listening to his voice reminded her of the countless times they stood on the balcony in each other's company. Now she sat alone on her living room sofa with the daily crossword puzzle and a notebook of her memoirs in her lap. She sighed and placed the notebook on her coffee table. Tomorrow she would stop by the SGC to make arrangements to acquire her personal possessions and maybe even get word about the negotiations with the Ancients. But tonight, she was going to order in some Chinese food since cooking for one was never really fun.
John walked through the SGC hallways and tried not to scowl at every person who stopped to gawk at him. He made his way into the men's locker room and found Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell just finishing getting dressed.
"Please tell me you got into a mud wrestling match with a hot alien babe," Cameron said, pulling a black t-shirt over his head.
"I got into a mud wrestling match with a tree root," John said, removing his mud saturated jacket.
"A tree root?" Cameron made a face. "At least you won, right?"
"Do I look like I won?"
"No." Cameron tried not to laugh. "You look like you got your ass handed to you on a platter by a... tree root."
"It was a big tree root!" John used his hands to gesture the root's size.
"Seriously, what happened?"
"I was explaining to Wallace the importance of stealth and I..."
"Tripped on a tree root?" Cameron supplied.
"...And fell into a mud pool."
"A mud pool?"
"Yeah, a pool of mud," John said grumpily.
"I guess that's better than a mud puddle," Cameron said, the statement sounded more like a question.
"It is bigger than a mud puddle," John explained, "because in a mud pool, you could have drowned in it. It was like quicksand!"
Cameron tried to hold his breath to keep from laughing, but he failed and started laughing at John's mud caked face. "I'll let you get your shower," Cameron said after he got a grip of himself. "I'm sure you don't want to meet up with Doctor Weir looking like that."
"Elizabeth is here?"
"Yeah, you didn't know?" Cameron asked. "I bumped into her when I was leaving Landry's office."
"Uh, I haven't had a chance to talk to her lately."
"Really?" Cameron crossed his arms over his chest. "I though you two were close."
"Yeah, it's just that… I guess we've all been pretty busy."
"I bet. Those damn Ori and the Trust are some pain in the asses, aren't they?"
John nodded. "They're as bad as the Wraith and Ancient Replicators we had back in Pegasus."
"All right, I'll catch you later Mud Man." Cameron was about to give John a pat on the back but stopped himself and waved goodbye instead before exiting the locker room.
"Mud Man?" John shook his head at his new nickname. There was a first for everything. He quickly gathered his things and hit the showers. He was determined to try and get a glimpse of Elizabeth before she escaped.
General Landry was busy reading a report when he noticed someone lurking outside in the briefing room. He leaned forward to see out the window of his office. It was Colonel Sheppard, sans dirt. Landry glanced at his watch. Sheppard was early; his briefing was still an hour from now. He had figured from the muddy state John and his team was in, they would have needed some time to clean the dirt off before their briefing. But there, outside his office, stood John Sheppard trying to peek into his office.
Hank knitted his thick eyebrows together, wondering what in the world was wrong with the Colonel. He closed the blue folder and decided it would be best to figure out what was wrong with Sheppard before it was too late for whatever his problem was.
"Colonel Sheppard," Hank said, exiting his office.
John had not expected General Landry to come out of his office. He thought that he had successfully peered into Landry's office discreetly enough without the General noticing. Apparently not. "Uh... General... I..."
"Colonel, are you all right?"
"Yes, sir. I'm fine, sir," John spat out. "I just came up here for... the briefing."
"You're still early, son."
John flipped his wrist over to read his watch. "Right," he nodded. "I guess I'll go get some lunch then." He nodded to Landry and tried to make his escape down the stairs. It was obvious Elizabeth was no longer in Landry's office, and there was a possibility that her meeting with Landry had just ended and she was still in the building.
"She left already," Landry suddenly said, realizing the only reason why John would venture up to his office. Ever since John had returned to Earth, he had done his duty and gone off-world like he was ordered, but he usually kept to himself and rarely came up to the briefing room to hang out. Not many people wanted to "hang out" with the commander of the SGC. Who could blame them? He was their boss. Even that trip to the woods with Mitchell was awkward.
But he was aware of the relationships between the Atlantis crew. They all took care of each other like a family. They had to. For over a year, they only had each other to depend on while stranded in a strange galaxy. Now that everyone had returned home and gotten on with their lives, it was rare for them to see each other, so it was natural that John would want to see Elizabeth. She was, after all, his former boss and friend.
"Sir?" John had stopped at the top of the stairs and turned around to look at Landry, pretending that he did not know what the older man was talking about.
"Elizabeth," he said. "You just missed her. She came saying you left her a message informing her that the rest of the gear from Pegasus was in. She left about ten minutes ago."
John wanted to kick himself. He knew he should not have bothered trying to be presentable. He was stuck in the shower longer than he had planned, and he had missed Elizabeth. At least he knew she was still alive. All those unreturned messages were beginning to concern him.
"How is she?"
"She seemed well. A bit distant, but can you blame her?" he added. "Sorry you missed her, colonel. She said she would have stayed to say hi, but she had other errands to run."
"Thank you, sir," John nodded. "I guess I'll get that lunch now." He quickly climbed down the stairs and wondered if Carson had seen Elizabeth. So he took a detour and headed to the infirmary.
"Can I help you, Colonel Sheppard?" Carson put the test tube he was holding in a rack and turned to John, who was leaning against a lab table, watching him.
"Did you know Elizabeth was here?" John picked up an empty test tube from the rack and looked into it.
"She was?" Carson carefully took the test tube from John's hand and replaced it in the rack.
"Yeah," John said, "Mitchell said he saw her in Landry's office."
"Is she still there?"
"No," he said with disappointment. "She pulled a Houdini and was gone when I got there."
"Maybe she was busy and had to leave," Carson suggested. "Don't take it personal. She didn't come by to visit me either."
"Do you think she's avoiding us?"
"Why would you say that?"
"You said so yourself she never returns your calls, and none of us," he pointed to Carson and himself, "have seen her in person."
"I'm sure there is an explanation, John. Elizabeth isn't known for being an irrational person."
Carson was right. Elizabeth was not an irrational person, and she was probably taking this return home harder than all of them. It was almost a month and she had not bothered to find another job. John was sure that she was not ready to move on and needed a bit more time. But still...
"Yeah, she probably just needs a bit more time," he said. Carson nodded in agreement. "So you want to get lunch?"
"Sorry, John," Carson shook his head. "I can't just yet. I need to stay here and monitor this test. It should be done in another hour or so. You should go ahead without me."
"Okay," John nodded and exited the infirmary just to see Cameron pass by. "Mitchell!" he called out.
Cameron turned around to see who called his name. "Hey Sheppard, you cleaned up nice," he grinned. "Did you see Elizabeth?"
"No," John said trying to hide his disappointment.
"I see you took too long prettying yourself up, eh?" Cameron teased.
"She was in a rush to go somewhere."
"Sure, whatever," Cameron said doubtfully. "Hey, there's Sam." He waved to Liuentenant Colonel Samantha Carter, who was followed by Vala Mal Doran. "Colonel!" he greeted Sam.
"Colonel."
"Colonel."
"Colonel."
Vala groaned. "You guys, the "colonel, colonel, colonel, colonel" thing is getting old. You guys should try doing something different." The three lieutenant colonels only looked at Vala blankly. "You should greet each other like 'Sam, Cam, Sam, Jo-' Vala stopped herself and made a face and turned to John."You're going to have to change your name to Jam because it's just not as fun with John."
"I kind of like John."
"Fine then, John," she said indignantly. "You just don't have any team spirit."
"You're just mad that we wouldn't let you call yourself colonel," Cameron said to Vala.
"That's because every time you guys do your 'colonel times four' thing, I get left out," Vala pouted.
"Vala, you get left out of a lot of things," Daniel said coming down the hall with Teal'c.
"Daniel!" She exclaimed and bounded towards Daniel hooking her arm around his arm.
Daniel let out a tired sigh. "Are you joining us for lunch, John?"
"Yeah, John here," Cameron placed his arm around John's shoulder, "took too long getting ready for his date with Elizabeth, so she ditched him."
"You're dating Doctor Weir?" Vala's ears perked up. "That figures."
"I am not dating Elizabeth," John said, adamant. "And what do you mean 'that figures'?"
"Oh come on, John. Don't play coy with me," Vala said. "You know exactly what I'm talking about. I saw how you and Elizabeth kept looking at each other when we were last on Atlantis."
"What?!"
Ignoring John's denial, Vala continued, "So did you two get into a lover's quarrel? Because, you know, make-up sex is the best. Right, Daniel?"
"Vala," Daniel was trying to pry her off his arm, "we've never spent the night together."
"That's what you think." Her grip on Daniel's arm was too firm, and he gave up. "So," Vala turned her attention back to John. "When are you going to apologize to her?"
"I'm not- Does she ever stop talking?" John looked helplessly at Daniel.
"Unfortunately not," Daniel sighed.
"Too bad you can't stick a lemon in front of her face to stop her either," Cameron said.
"Did you try it?" John asked, remembering how Rodney would cringe and practically run from John when the citrus weapon made an appearance.
"Oh yeah," Cameron glared at Vala.
"Didn't Vala just take the lemon and bounce if off your head?" Sam asked.
"Indeed." Teal'c added raising an eyebrow.
"And bounced it did." On Vala's face was a smug grin.
"Don't even remind me," Cameron said, annoyed. "Come on, the whole gang is here. Let's get some grub. I'm starving."
Everyone agreed and they headed for the elevator. John followed SG-1 and observed the camaraderie between them. It made him think of his own team. The team he now led was nothing like his former team. Of course, all SG team members were the "best and the brightest", but they were not Rodney, Ronon, and Teyla. Even though he was home, it did not feel like home.
The red light on her answering machine had been blinking ever since she got home, which was a couple of hours ago. Elizabeth figured it was probably Rodney or Carson again since most messages offering her a job position had dwindled down after her lack of responses in the first couple weeks. She decided to listen to the message later. She had gone to the SGC on a mission to retrieve her personal belongings, and now several trunks lay in her living room.
She had stayed to chat with General Landry and asked if the IOA needed any other advice. During her visit, there was an unscheduled off-world activation. Landry excused himself to go into the control room, while she had stayed in the briefing room and looked out the window into the embarkation room. She watched the room glow from the event horizon puddle, and watched for the returning team. The returning team looked as if they had taken a mud bath, and when she realized that the team leader was John, she chuckled and wondered what had happened to him.
As she stood on the floor above, she felt as if she were back on Atlantis standing in the control room, watching John and his team returning from another mission. She had almost run down the stairs to greet him, but then she realized she was not in Atlantis. She was back on Earth, in the SGC, commanded by General Hank Landry. Those days in Atlantis were long gone. When Landry returned, she excused herself and returned home.
She stood in front of the trunks, waiting. Eventually, she was going to have to unpack and move these trunks out because, frankly, they were cluttering her living room. Elizabeth let out a long sigh and finally flipped open a trunk. It was a trunk of her books. Most of the books were texts she had taken to aid in translating Ancient, but several were novels she took along with her. She grabbed a couple of hardcover books to shelve, but stopped when she found a book she did not recognize as her own. She placed the books in her hand down, picked up the book, and smiled. The Princess Bride by William Goldman.
John must have snuck the book into her collection when she was not looking. Even when she avoided him, he still managed to make her smile. Elizabeth decided unpacking would wait until later. She flipped open the novel and sank into her comfortable sofa and began to read. She could work on moving on with her life later. Right now she wanted to lose herself in a classic tale of true love and high adventure.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
"You know you really need to change your message to 'I will NOT return you call EVER.' Because I've left you a lot of messages and you haven't returned a single one! And I know you're there because with the number of messages I left in your mailbox for both your cell and machine, they would be full by now, so you're obviously there listening to them or deleting them... But seriously, are you all right? Carson said that Landry told Sheppard that you came into the SGC the other day and you seemed fine." There was a short pause as if Rodney had realized something. "And why am I always the last to know anything? Just because I'm in Area 51 doesn't mean I'm not on the map anymore." Elizabeth could hear Rodney sigh as his voice calmed down again. "Anyways I wanted to let you know I'll be flying into town tomorrow and I thought the four of us could hang out or something. Call me... or not... Bye."
Beep.
Elizabeth furrowed her eyebrows as she stared at the blinking red light on her machine. Rodney must have been having a bad day at work. She did feel terrible for ignoring all the countless messages her friends had been leaving her, but she just did not want to face them yet.
She sighed and looked at her coffee table. It was cluttered with plates and empty take-out boxes. She really should clear the table, but she was not expecting any guests, so instead she plopped herself down on her sofa and stared at the notebook pages of her memoirs. After flipping through the notebook, she picked up the daily newspaper and started to work on the crossword puzzle.
She was trying to figure out a four-letter word for "energy source". ZPMS? Elizabeth giggled to herself, and jotted down the word "COAL" instead. Then there was a knock at her door. To her surprised it was Carson. She had spent all this time avoiding her friends that it never occurred to her that eventually they would come to visit her in person.
As she invited Carson into her house, she felt awkward and unprepared. She apologized for various things and tried to clear the clutter off her coffee table. They began with polite chitchat at first, but Elizabeth waited dreadfully for the question she had been avoiding since her return.
"Elizabeth, why haven't you taken another position?" Elizabeth looked at Carson and tried to give him an excuse about the SGC needing her to remain as a consultant for the IOA and Homeworld Security, but she knew that was a terrible answer and she finally admitted. "I guess I'm just not ready yet."
Carson gave her an understanding nod, and the next thing Elizabeth knew, she had a dinner date with her three boys tomorrow. She looked at Carson helplessly. Since there was no way of getting out of this dinner, she agreed to have Carson pick her up at seven.
No matter how reluctant she was at seeing everyone, a part of her was excited to see John and Rodney again. It would be just like old times... almost.
"Would you like some more water, sir?"
John stopped swishing the water in his glass and let the waitress refill his glass. As soon as they had arrived at the restaurant, Rodney had excused himself to the men's room and left John alone at the table. Carson had called earlier to tell him he was on his way to pick up Elizabeth and they would arrive at the restaurant shortly.
He hated sitting at the table alone waiting for people. It made him feel like he was being stood up by a date. He noticed a woman at the table across from him look over, and he gave her an uncomfortable smile. John wished somebody would come soon, because he was starting to feel lonely at the dinner table.
He was about to flag down a waiter for a bottle of beer, when his wish was granted and a beautiful familiar face walked towards him.
"Hello, stranger," he smiled.
"Hello, John." Elizabeth returned his smile and took a seat next to him.
John could not tear his gaze from Elizabeth. He had not seen her since the day they had returned from Atlantis. Her hair was tied up, her face was made up, and she looked perfect.
"How are you?" he asked.
"I'm good. You?"
"I'm all right. Been busy. I heard you were writing your never-to-be-published memoirs."
"Yes," she said, "I've been writing a bit. I wanted to work on it while the memories are still fresh." John nodded and took a sip from his glass as Elizabeth settled into her seat. "Where's Rodney? I thought you two arrived together."
"He's in the little boy's room. He complained about jetlag and needed to 'freshen up' before you and Carson arrived."
"Jetlag?" Elizabeth furrowed her eyebrows. "There is only an hour time difference between here and Nevada."
"You know Rodney," John shrugged. "Where's Carson?"
"Oh, he's parking the car. He told me to head in first to see if you and Rodney were here yet. And there he is." Elizabeth raised her hand for Carson to see.
"Hello, John," Carson said when he reached the table.
"Hey, Carson."
"Where's Rodney?" Carson took a seat next to Elizabeth and across from John.
"I think he fell in the toilet," John said nonchalantly, balancing a utensil between his fingers.
"Excuse me?"
Elizabeth chuckled. "He's in the men's room."
"Oh," Carson smiled, "Shall we look at the menus while we wait for Rodney to return?"
"Sounds good to me," John said and opened the menu their waitress had placed on the table.
Elizabeth smiled to herself as she flipped over the menu. This was like old times minus the excitement of saving the galaxy. However, after a couple of hours, she amended that thought when her cell phone rang and found that NORAD was contacting her, John, and Rodney. Despite the seriousness of General Landry's voice calling for their return to the SGC, Elizabeth could not help but feel a little excited. Maybe this would be exactly like old times.
~Finis
Author: athenaktt
Pairing: John/Elizabeth friendship
Rating: Everyone
Spoilers: 3x10 "The Return - Part I", Story takes place during "The Return - Part I". Mention of SG-1, 10x05 "Uninvited".
Summary: This is a short fic that is mostly Elizabeth's POV during her six weeks back home.
A/N: Thanks to mizz_magenta for beta-ing. ;)
Click here for Fanfiction.net version
Not Quite Paradise
Numbness washed over Elizabeth as she stood in the gateroom watching the Ancients sitting behind the control consoles in the control room above. Atlantis was returned to its rightful owners. She glanced around at the somber faces of her expedition team as they exchanged their farewells to each other. Everything around her was happening too quickly, while her numb body moved too slowly.
"Rodney," she called more from instinct than from the urgency to leave.
Rodney collected his things and headed down into the gateroom with the rest of the team. He quickly said goodbye to Ronon and Teyla, and started for the gate after John and Carson.
Elizabeth's numb body turned around and started to follow the group through the gate, but she stopped and took one last look around the room. Her memories of Atlantis in the last couple of years came flooding back to her. She silently sighed to herself and stepped into the event horizon.
"Welcome home, Doctor Weir," General Hank Landry said as Elizabeth stepped onto the ramp in the Stargate Command gateroom.
"Thank you, General. It's good to be back," Elizabeth said, concealing the pang she felt in her heart.
The room bustled with Atlantis expedition members continuing their goodbyes before they all moved onto another life. Another life...
Elizabeth did not want another life. She was happy with the life she had. How could she ever go back to her previous life? John was right. She had peaked. Everything was downhill from here.
"Doctor Weir," Landry's voice interrupted her thoughts. "After you and your people are cleared by our doctors, and you have completed your debriefings, you're free to go."
"Yes, sir," she said absentmindedly and followed the others out of the gateroom.
After the SGC doctors cleared her as healthy, Elizabeth went straight to her guest quarters and only made an appearance at briefings when it was required. Her body was still numb as she sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the wall. A knock on door the startled her, it was probably Sergeant Walter Harriman telling her that her transportation home was ready.
She sighed and reluctantly moved across the room to open the door.
"John?" Seeing John at her door surprised her, which was unusual since in Atlantis John often knocked at her door to bring her reports and status updates.
"How are you? Are you all right?" he asked closing the door behind him.
"I'm fine, John."
"Are you sure?" he asked doubtfully.
"I just-"
"Miss Atlantis?" John supplied.
"Yes," she admitted. "I know it's silly. We were only in Atlantis for a couple years. I've practically spent my whole life here on Earth. I never..."
"You never thought you'd get so attached to Atlantis," he finished. "If it makes you feel any better, I miss Atlantis too."
"I can't believe it's over." Her voice was a near whisper.
"I know," he said softly. He observed Elizabeth's posture. Her eyes were cast down on the floor. He knew she was not okay, but he decided it was best not to push her. "Um, Rodney and Radek are about to head to the airport. I thought maybe you'd want to say goodbye."
"Yes," she said, looking up at John. "Of course. Thank you."
"Come on." John held open the door for her and they headed towards the elevators.
"Take care, Rodney," Elizabeth said after hugging him goodbye.
"Thanks," Rodney said gathering his luggage. "Do you know what you are going to do now?"
"No," she shook her head, "not yet."
"Why not?" he asked after getting a handle of his luggage. "I'm sure everyone wants you to work for them."
"Not everyone," she said pursing her lips together.
"Everyone on Earth," he amended.
"I was thinking of taking a vacation break."
"A vacation is good," he nodded. "If you need anything, call Sheppard." John made a face at Rodney. "What? It's logical. I'm obviously too far to be any use to Elizabeth, and you're more fit for grunt work than Carson."
Elizabeth smiled. She was going to miss this. "Thank you, Rodney." She moved over to Radek and gave him a quick hug. "All the best, teaching in Masaryk, Radek. Měj śe."
"Goodbye, Elizabeth. Take care," Radek said.
As Elizabeth and Carson said their farewells to Radek, John gave Rodney a firm handshake. "Take care, Rodney. Don't blow up anymore solar systems."
"It was uninhabited!" Rodney resisted dropping his bag on John's toes. "Anyways, take care. And take care of her, okay?" Rodney glanced at Elizabeth, who was still chatting with Radek. "She seems well, but we all know it's hitting her hard."
"I know," John agreed. Radek and Elizabeth had finished chatting. "Well... have a good flight, you two," John said shaking Radek's hand.
"We'll be in touch, right?" Rodney asked Elizabeth.
"Of course," she nodded.
She watched Rodney and Radek get into their shuttle to the airport. It was really happening. They were back from Atlantis and going their separate ways. Moving on.
"So," John said, starting to walk back into the SGC after Carson, who went ahead of them to hide his moist eyes. "A vacation, you say? Lucky you. I think Landry is going to send me of off-world tomorrow."
"But you just got back."
"I told you a lot of people in the Air Force don't really like me," he shrugged.
"You're going to be fine, John," she assured him.
"Are you?"
They stopped walking and John looked into her green eyes. She wanted to say "no", but instead she lied.
"Yes."
John knew she was lying, and she knew he knew.
"Really, I'll be fine." She gave him a feeble smile.
"You don't need to convince me, Elizabeth."
He was right. She did not need to convince him that she would be all right. She needed to convince herself it was over and to move on. But she did not want to move on. Not yet.
"So do you need any help with your luggage?"
"No," she shook her head. "I put most of my stuff on the Daedalus. I don't have much stuff with me, but thanks for offering."
"I'm just doing my duty as your grunt."
"You mean my Lieutenant Colonel Grunt?" she said tilting her head and smiled.
"Actually, I'm your Lieutenant Colonel Errand Boy/Grunt."
"Not anymore, John." Elizabeth's smile faded. "I'm not your boss anymore."
"For what it's worth, you've been the best boss I've had so far."
"Thank you, John."
"Now seriously, if you need anything, call me."
Elizabeth nodded as they entered the elevator to head back underground.
The ring of the phone broke her dreamless sleep. She wanted to ignore the phone, but it could have been NORAD. She reached her hand out blindly to pick up the phone, but the answering machine beat her to it.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
"Elizabeth, it's Rodney. I tried calling your cell phone, but you didn't pick up so I figured you'd be home. I guess your not, because if you were, you'd pick up your phone, right? I just called to see how you are settling in. Granted, it's only been a week since we've been back, so you're probably still getting things together. Anyways I just called to see how you are doing. I tried talking to Carson, but with the Ori wreaking havoc all over the galaxy, he's been busy at the SGC. Sheppard is always off-world, and you're not home... so I have no one to talk to... Uh... so call me. I don't mind taking a break from my busy schedule to chat, unlike some people. Bye."
Beep.
Rodney said that they had been back for only a week. Was it only a week? It felt longer to her. It sounded as though everyone had moved on. Rodney was busily working on a project in Area 51. Carson and John were both being kept busy at Stargate Command. And she was lying in bed still waiting to move on. She forced herself out of bed and trudged into the bathroom. She looked at her reflection in the mirror. She looked well rested, but she still felt lost. But how else would she feel? She had left paradise to come home. Even though she belonged on Earth, it was not quite paradise.
She had thought about flying to Washington D.C. to visit her mother. Her mother always had a way of comforting her. Even in a nanite induced hallucination, her "mother" eased her pain just by a simple touch and smile. Not to mention Sedge, she was always her best companion. It was funny to think that when the nanites were trying to convince her Atlantis did not exist; they conjured up the two things that comforted her to help her forget Atlantis. Of course, she could not forget Atlantis, and that was, thankfully, only a nightmare. This was different. This was real. She could not wake up from this dream and find herself back in Atlantis.
Each night she would wake up to the car alarms, traffic, noisy neighbors, and sometimes silence. She missed the soothing sound of the ocean that surrounded Atlantis. She missed looking out the windows towards the magnificent spires of the city. She missed Atlantis. She missed her home. Her paradise.
She splashed cold water on her face over and over again hoping that she could wake up from this dream, but like every morning she was faced with reality. In time she would have to move on. She pulled a towel off the rack and dried her face. In the mirror, her reflection looked back at her telling her she was still not ready to move on. But from Rodney's message, everyone had moved on with their lives while she lingered behind grasping on to her memories of Atlantis. She needed to find a way to hold onto her memories. She exited her bathroom and found a notebook on her desk. She grabbed and pen and decided she would write down her experiences in Atlantis. Get everything straight in her head. The three years went by so quickly. Too quickly.
She blinked back her tears and sat down in her sofa, deciding to start at the beginning. She recounted the day she received word she would be leading an international team of scientists to the lost city of Atlantis. Then she remembered flying down to Antarctica to the Ancient outpost. She remembered her excitement when Doctor Daniel Jackson told her they could actually go to the lost city. On that same day, she remembered meeting, John Sheppard, at the time a Major, who unwittingly commanded the Ancient outpost chair with his mere thoughts. The first weeks of preparation were hectic. She could not wait to find Atlantis, and when she arrived at Atlantis she knew she never wanted to leave even though they were constantly threatened by the Wraith, enemy races, and most recently, Replicators. She fell in love with the city the moment she set foot in it; and leaving it forever broke her heart. Elizabeth felt her throat knot up again. She had decided that since she was not going to moving on. She would continue to lose herself in the past. When she was ready, she would move on... but not now. Not yet.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
"Hello Elizabeth, its Carson. I'm just calling to see how you are doing. Rodney said he tried to call you several times and you never returned his calls. He's convinced that you're angry at him and won't answer any of his calls, so he pestered me into calling you. Not that I needed to be pestered, I've been meaning to call you and see how you are doing. You're probably busy. I heard you have been in and out of Stargate Command a couple times last week to meet with the IOA. Next time you're in the SGC, stop by the infirmary. I'd love to have lunch or dinner with you. I'm sure John would like to see you too. You have my number so call me. Goodbye.
Beep.
Elizabeth eyed the blinking red light on her answering machine and smiled to herself. It was nice to have friends who cared about her. But she still didn't feel like seeing any of them. Why, she did not know. They all seemed to be dealing with the change well. Too well. They had all moved on with their lives and continued working like they had never left the galaxy. She was back for nearly three weeks, and she still could not stop thinking about standing outside on the balcony watching the sun rising and setting. Watching and listening to the rippling ocean waves, breathing in the fresh air, and feeling the wind on her face. All those things were not the same here.
She closed her eyes and sighed. She knew why she avoided her friends. She was afraid that being around them would obligate her to move on with her life as well. Each time she went to the SGC, she went out of her way to avoid running into John or Carson. It was easy enough to avoid both men. John was usually off-world, and Carson was usually in the infirmary. Elizabeth felt bad for avoiding them, but she promised herself she would see them when she was ready. But right now she was not ready, and she began to wonder if she ever would be.
The phone rang again and startled her. She let out a breath and let the phone ring again. She assumed it was Rodney, since he tried to call her at least twice every other day to give an update of his research and how he missed having Zelenka as a working partner. Though he never said those exact words, Elizabeth knew what Rodney was thinking.
She sighed and continued staring at the crossword puzzle in her lap. She wanted to continue writing her memoirs, but the daily crossword puzzle got her attention instead.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
Elizabeth looked up from her crossword when there was a silence after the beep. Maybe it was not Rodney. If it was not Rodney, who else would be calling her?
"Elizabeth?"
"John?" She said out loud to herself.
In the last three weeks, John had not called her once. At least she didn't remember him calling her. She had a few unidentified calls on her cell, but assumed they were the wrong number.
"Uh... It's John. Sorry, I didn't call you sooner. I figured with Rodney and Carson tag team calling you, you didn't need another person to add to the mix. Rodney is convinced that you hate him. But I know you probably just want some more time to yourself. Uh, the reason I'm calling you is because the Daedalus arrived today and our things are finally here. You'd think that with a new ZPM, we wouldn't have to wait nearly three weeks for our stuff, but they want to conserve the ZPM for emergencies. So three weeks delivery time it is. Well, if you need help in bringing some stuff to your place, I'd be glad to help... unless some Ori Prior decides to take my soul in my next mission. Then you'll have to get Beckett to help you. Hope you are enjoying your vacation. Talk to you soon. Bye."
Beep.
Without thinking, she pressed the replay button and listened to John's voice again. Listening to his voice reminded her of the countless times they stood on the balcony in each other's company. Now she sat alone on her living room sofa with the daily crossword puzzle and a notebook of her memoirs in her lap. She sighed and placed the notebook on her coffee table. Tomorrow she would stop by the SGC to make arrangements to acquire her personal possessions and maybe even get word about the negotiations with the Ancients. But tonight, she was going to order in some Chinese food since cooking for one was never really fun.
John walked through the SGC hallways and tried not to scowl at every person who stopped to gawk at him. He made his way into the men's locker room and found Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell just finishing getting dressed.
"Please tell me you got into a mud wrestling match with a hot alien babe," Cameron said, pulling a black t-shirt over his head.
"I got into a mud wrestling match with a tree root," John said, removing his mud saturated jacket.
"A tree root?" Cameron made a face. "At least you won, right?"
"Do I look like I won?"
"No." Cameron tried not to laugh. "You look like you got your ass handed to you on a platter by a... tree root."
"It was a big tree root!" John used his hands to gesture the root's size.
"Seriously, what happened?"
"I was explaining to Wallace the importance of stealth and I..."
"Tripped on a tree root?" Cameron supplied.
"...And fell into a mud pool."
"A mud pool?"
"Yeah, a pool of mud," John said grumpily.
"I guess that's better than a mud puddle," Cameron said, the statement sounded more like a question.
"It is bigger than a mud puddle," John explained, "because in a mud pool, you could have drowned in it. It was like quicksand!"
Cameron tried to hold his breath to keep from laughing, but he failed and started laughing at John's mud caked face. "I'll let you get your shower," Cameron said after he got a grip of himself. "I'm sure you don't want to meet up with Doctor Weir looking like that."
"Elizabeth is here?"
"Yeah, you didn't know?" Cameron asked. "I bumped into her when I was leaving Landry's office."
"Uh, I haven't had a chance to talk to her lately."
"Really?" Cameron crossed his arms over his chest. "I though you two were close."
"Yeah, it's just that… I guess we've all been pretty busy."
"I bet. Those damn Ori and the Trust are some pain in the asses, aren't they?"
John nodded. "They're as bad as the Wraith and Ancient Replicators we had back in Pegasus."
"All right, I'll catch you later Mud Man." Cameron was about to give John a pat on the back but stopped himself and waved goodbye instead before exiting the locker room.
"Mud Man?" John shook his head at his new nickname. There was a first for everything. He quickly gathered his things and hit the showers. He was determined to try and get a glimpse of Elizabeth before she escaped.
General Landry was busy reading a report when he noticed someone lurking outside in the briefing room. He leaned forward to see out the window of his office. It was Colonel Sheppard, sans dirt. Landry glanced at his watch. Sheppard was early; his briefing was still an hour from now. He had figured from the muddy state John and his team was in, they would have needed some time to clean the dirt off before their briefing. But there, outside his office, stood John Sheppard trying to peek into his office.
Hank knitted his thick eyebrows together, wondering what in the world was wrong with the Colonel. He closed the blue folder and decided it would be best to figure out what was wrong with Sheppard before it was too late for whatever his problem was.
"Colonel Sheppard," Hank said, exiting his office.
John had not expected General Landry to come out of his office. He thought that he had successfully peered into Landry's office discreetly enough without the General noticing. Apparently not. "Uh... General... I..."
"Colonel, are you all right?"
"Yes, sir. I'm fine, sir," John spat out. "I just came up here for... the briefing."
"You're still early, son."
John flipped his wrist over to read his watch. "Right," he nodded. "I guess I'll go get some lunch then." He nodded to Landry and tried to make his escape down the stairs. It was obvious Elizabeth was no longer in Landry's office, and there was a possibility that her meeting with Landry had just ended and she was still in the building.
"She left already," Landry suddenly said, realizing the only reason why John would venture up to his office. Ever since John had returned to Earth, he had done his duty and gone off-world like he was ordered, but he usually kept to himself and rarely came up to the briefing room to hang out. Not many people wanted to "hang out" with the commander of the SGC. Who could blame them? He was their boss. Even that trip to the woods with Mitchell was awkward.
But he was aware of the relationships between the Atlantis crew. They all took care of each other like a family. They had to. For over a year, they only had each other to depend on while stranded in a strange galaxy. Now that everyone had returned home and gotten on with their lives, it was rare for them to see each other, so it was natural that John would want to see Elizabeth. She was, after all, his former boss and friend.
"Sir?" John had stopped at the top of the stairs and turned around to look at Landry, pretending that he did not know what the older man was talking about.
"Elizabeth," he said. "You just missed her. She came saying you left her a message informing her that the rest of the gear from Pegasus was in. She left about ten minutes ago."
John wanted to kick himself. He knew he should not have bothered trying to be presentable. He was stuck in the shower longer than he had planned, and he had missed Elizabeth. At least he knew she was still alive. All those unreturned messages were beginning to concern him.
"How is she?"
"She seemed well. A bit distant, but can you blame her?" he added. "Sorry you missed her, colonel. She said she would have stayed to say hi, but she had other errands to run."
"Thank you, sir," John nodded. "I guess I'll get that lunch now." He quickly climbed down the stairs and wondered if Carson had seen Elizabeth. So he took a detour and headed to the infirmary.
"Can I help you, Colonel Sheppard?" Carson put the test tube he was holding in a rack and turned to John, who was leaning against a lab table, watching him.
"Did you know Elizabeth was here?" John picked up an empty test tube from the rack and looked into it.
"She was?" Carson carefully took the test tube from John's hand and replaced it in the rack.
"Yeah," John said, "Mitchell said he saw her in Landry's office."
"Is she still there?"
"No," he said with disappointment. "She pulled a Houdini and was gone when I got there."
"Maybe she was busy and had to leave," Carson suggested. "Don't take it personal. She didn't come by to visit me either."
"Do you think she's avoiding us?"
"Why would you say that?"
"You said so yourself she never returns your calls, and none of us," he pointed to Carson and himself, "have seen her in person."
"I'm sure there is an explanation, John. Elizabeth isn't known for being an irrational person."
Carson was right. Elizabeth was not an irrational person, and she was probably taking this return home harder than all of them. It was almost a month and she had not bothered to find another job. John was sure that she was not ready to move on and needed a bit more time. But still...
"Yeah, she probably just needs a bit more time," he said. Carson nodded in agreement. "So you want to get lunch?"
"Sorry, John," Carson shook his head. "I can't just yet. I need to stay here and monitor this test. It should be done in another hour or so. You should go ahead without me."
"Okay," John nodded and exited the infirmary just to see Cameron pass by. "Mitchell!" he called out.
Cameron turned around to see who called his name. "Hey Sheppard, you cleaned up nice," he grinned. "Did you see Elizabeth?"
"No," John said trying to hide his disappointment.
"I see you took too long prettying yourself up, eh?" Cameron teased.
"She was in a rush to go somewhere."
"Sure, whatever," Cameron said doubtfully. "Hey, there's Sam." He waved to Liuentenant Colonel Samantha Carter, who was followed by Vala Mal Doran. "Colonel!" he greeted Sam.
"Colonel."
"Colonel."
"Colonel."
Vala groaned. "You guys, the "colonel, colonel, colonel, colonel" thing is getting old. You guys should try doing something different." The three lieutenant colonels only looked at Vala blankly. "You should greet each other like 'Sam, Cam, Sam, Jo-' Vala stopped herself and made a face and turned to John."You're going to have to change your name to Jam because it's just not as fun with John."
"I kind of like John."
"Fine then, John," she said indignantly. "You just don't have any team spirit."
"You're just mad that we wouldn't let you call yourself colonel," Cameron said to Vala.
"That's because every time you guys do your 'colonel times four' thing, I get left out," Vala pouted.
"Vala, you get left out of a lot of things," Daniel said coming down the hall with Teal'c.
"Daniel!" She exclaimed and bounded towards Daniel hooking her arm around his arm.
Daniel let out a tired sigh. "Are you joining us for lunch, John?"
"Yeah, John here," Cameron placed his arm around John's shoulder, "took too long getting ready for his date with Elizabeth, so she ditched him."
"You're dating Doctor Weir?" Vala's ears perked up. "That figures."
"I am not dating Elizabeth," John said, adamant. "And what do you mean 'that figures'?"
"Oh come on, John. Don't play coy with me," Vala said. "You know exactly what I'm talking about. I saw how you and Elizabeth kept looking at each other when we were last on Atlantis."
"What?!"
Ignoring John's denial, Vala continued, "So did you two get into a lover's quarrel? Because, you know, make-up sex is the best. Right, Daniel?"
"Vala," Daniel was trying to pry her off his arm, "we've never spent the night together."
"That's what you think." Her grip on Daniel's arm was too firm, and he gave up. "So," Vala turned her attention back to John. "When are you going to apologize to her?"
"I'm not- Does she ever stop talking?" John looked helplessly at Daniel.
"Unfortunately not," Daniel sighed.
"Too bad you can't stick a lemon in front of her face to stop her either," Cameron said.
"Did you try it?" John asked, remembering how Rodney would cringe and practically run from John when the citrus weapon made an appearance.
"Oh yeah," Cameron glared at Vala.
"Didn't Vala just take the lemon and bounce if off your head?" Sam asked.
"Indeed." Teal'c added raising an eyebrow.
"And bounced it did." On Vala's face was a smug grin.
"Don't even remind me," Cameron said, annoyed. "Come on, the whole gang is here. Let's get some grub. I'm starving."
Everyone agreed and they headed for the elevator. John followed SG-1 and observed the camaraderie between them. It made him think of his own team. The team he now led was nothing like his former team. Of course, all SG team members were the "best and the brightest", but they were not Rodney, Ronon, and Teyla. Even though he was home, it did not feel like home.
The red light on her answering machine had been blinking ever since she got home, which was a couple of hours ago. Elizabeth figured it was probably Rodney or Carson again since most messages offering her a job position had dwindled down after her lack of responses in the first couple weeks. She decided to listen to the message later. She had gone to the SGC on a mission to retrieve her personal belongings, and now several trunks lay in her living room.
She had stayed to chat with General Landry and asked if the IOA needed any other advice. During her visit, there was an unscheduled off-world activation. Landry excused himself to go into the control room, while she had stayed in the briefing room and looked out the window into the embarkation room. She watched the room glow from the event horizon puddle, and watched for the returning team. The returning team looked as if they had taken a mud bath, and when she realized that the team leader was John, she chuckled and wondered what had happened to him.
As she stood on the floor above, she felt as if she were back on Atlantis standing in the control room, watching John and his team returning from another mission. She had almost run down the stairs to greet him, but then she realized she was not in Atlantis. She was back on Earth, in the SGC, commanded by General Hank Landry. Those days in Atlantis were long gone. When Landry returned, she excused herself and returned home.
She stood in front of the trunks, waiting. Eventually, she was going to have to unpack and move these trunks out because, frankly, they were cluttering her living room. Elizabeth let out a long sigh and finally flipped open a trunk. It was a trunk of her books. Most of the books were texts she had taken to aid in translating Ancient, but several were novels she took along with her. She grabbed a couple of hardcover books to shelve, but stopped when she found a book she did not recognize as her own. She placed the books in her hand down, picked up the book, and smiled. The Princess Bride by William Goldman.
John must have snuck the book into her collection when she was not looking. Even when she avoided him, he still managed to make her smile. Elizabeth decided unpacking would wait until later. She flipped open the novel and sank into her comfortable sofa and began to read. She could work on moving on with her life later. Right now she wanted to lose herself in a classic tale of true love and high adventure.
"You've reached Doctor Elizabeth Weir. I am unavailable to take your call. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible."
Beep.
"You know you really need to change your message to 'I will NOT return you call EVER.' Because I've left you a lot of messages and you haven't returned a single one! And I know you're there because with the number of messages I left in your mailbox for both your cell and machine, they would be full by now, so you're obviously there listening to them or deleting them... But seriously, are you all right? Carson said that Landry told Sheppard that you came into the SGC the other day and you seemed fine." There was a short pause as if Rodney had realized something. "And why am I always the last to know anything? Just because I'm in Area 51 doesn't mean I'm not on the map anymore." Elizabeth could hear Rodney sigh as his voice calmed down again. "Anyways I wanted to let you know I'll be flying into town tomorrow and I thought the four of us could hang out or something. Call me... or not... Bye."
Beep.
Elizabeth furrowed her eyebrows as she stared at the blinking red light on her machine. Rodney must have been having a bad day at work. She did feel terrible for ignoring all the countless messages her friends had been leaving her, but she just did not want to face them yet.
She sighed and looked at her coffee table. It was cluttered with plates and empty take-out boxes. She really should clear the table, but she was not expecting any guests, so instead she plopped herself down on her sofa and stared at the notebook pages of her memoirs. After flipping through the notebook, she picked up the daily newspaper and started to work on the crossword puzzle.
She was trying to figure out a four-letter word for "energy source". ZPMS? Elizabeth giggled to herself, and jotted down the word "COAL" instead. Then there was a knock at her door. To her surprised it was Carson. She had spent all this time avoiding her friends that it never occurred to her that eventually they would come to visit her in person.
As she invited Carson into her house, she felt awkward and unprepared. She apologized for various things and tried to clear the clutter off her coffee table. They began with polite chitchat at first, but Elizabeth waited dreadfully for the question she had been avoiding since her return.
"Elizabeth, why haven't you taken another position?" Elizabeth looked at Carson and tried to give him an excuse about the SGC needing her to remain as a consultant for the IOA and Homeworld Security, but she knew that was a terrible answer and she finally admitted. "I guess I'm just not ready yet."
Carson gave her an understanding nod, and the next thing Elizabeth knew, she had a dinner date with her three boys tomorrow. She looked at Carson helplessly. Since there was no way of getting out of this dinner, she agreed to have Carson pick her up at seven.
No matter how reluctant she was at seeing everyone, a part of her was excited to see John and Rodney again. It would be just like old times... almost.
"Would you like some more water, sir?"
John stopped swishing the water in his glass and let the waitress refill his glass. As soon as they had arrived at the restaurant, Rodney had excused himself to the men's room and left John alone at the table. Carson had called earlier to tell him he was on his way to pick up Elizabeth and they would arrive at the restaurant shortly.
He hated sitting at the table alone waiting for people. It made him feel like he was being stood up by a date. He noticed a woman at the table across from him look over, and he gave her an uncomfortable smile. John wished somebody would come soon, because he was starting to feel lonely at the dinner table.
He was about to flag down a waiter for a bottle of beer, when his wish was granted and a beautiful familiar face walked towards him.
"Hello, stranger," he smiled.
"Hello, John." Elizabeth returned his smile and took a seat next to him.
John could not tear his gaze from Elizabeth. He had not seen her since the day they had returned from Atlantis. Her hair was tied up, her face was made up, and she looked perfect.
"How are you?" he asked.
"I'm good. You?"
"I'm all right. Been busy. I heard you were writing your never-to-be-published memoirs."
"Yes," she said, "I've been writing a bit. I wanted to work on it while the memories are still fresh." John nodded and took a sip from his glass as Elizabeth settled into her seat. "Where's Rodney? I thought you two arrived together."
"He's in the little boy's room. He complained about jetlag and needed to 'freshen up' before you and Carson arrived."
"Jetlag?" Elizabeth furrowed her eyebrows. "There is only an hour time difference between here and Nevada."
"You know Rodney," John shrugged. "Where's Carson?"
"Oh, he's parking the car. He told me to head in first to see if you and Rodney were here yet. And there he is." Elizabeth raised her hand for Carson to see.
"Hello, John," Carson said when he reached the table.
"Hey, Carson."
"Where's Rodney?" Carson took a seat next to Elizabeth and across from John.
"I think he fell in the toilet," John said nonchalantly, balancing a utensil between his fingers.
"Excuse me?"
Elizabeth chuckled. "He's in the men's room."
"Oh," Carson smiled, "Shall we look at the menus while we wait for Rodney to return?"
"Sounds good to me," John said and opened the menu their waitress had placed on the table.
Elizabeth smiled to herself as she flipped over the menu. This was like old times minus the excitement of saving the galaxy. However, after a couple of hours, she amended that thought when her cell phone rang and found that NORAD was contacting her, John, and Rodney. Despite the seriousness of General Landry's voice calling for their return to the SGC, Elizabeth could not help but feel a little excited. Maybe this would be exactly like old times.
~Finis