CHARACTERS: Megamind + YOU?!
LOCATION: Traversing the ship, probably lost, eventual destination -- or so he hopes -- is engineering.
WARNINGS: Megamind is a supergenius with zero common sense. And terrible with people.
SUMMARY: Megamind has gone exploring. He is also prone to attempting to pry off parts of the ship to get into it's wiring and scan
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He's also completely aware that he's not really supposed to be out this far, or... well, he's not sure if he's supposed to be. But it's not like the two humans who are running this ship are going to know that he's wandering into potentially off-limit locales.
He does, however, know that when he sees someone approaching from the opposite direction, that they might know he's not supposed to be here. They might be patrolling. They might just be lost. But the fact remains that when he sees... some sort of alien, tall and skinny and blue, coming from the opposite direction he's walking in, he tenses up. He's ready for a strife if he needs to be, despite the fact that he has no weapons and certainly has no power. ( ... )
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But he just-- eyes Eridan as he comes close, eyes bright and green-- and then just keeps walking.
"Nice scarf," he says-- though it's not with any sort of genuine sentiment. It might, in fact, involve some snickering.
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"Wwanna borroww it? Might make your head look less fuckin' bulbous than your shitty collar poppin' does."
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"...besides, are you really one to talk? I mean, you're like a skunk gone punk," Megamind says with an arch of one taunting brow. At least he was well groomed! Impeccably shaped brows, and a carefully trimmed goatee made him obviously superior. "Who did your hair before you woke up, and can you punch them through time and space for it? A refund would not be enough. Revahnge would have to be taken!"
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"Angelfish, if you think that skull'a yours is doin' anythin' but makin' you look like a bloated, beached wwhale, you're more delusional than you'll evver knoww." He pauses, drrragggggs it out just right, and adds, "An' this is my natural hair." (No, it's not, but he will never tell anyone he dyes it.)
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There is a moment's pause, one hand -- long fingers (and those are some seriously long fingers) pressed just over where a human's heart would be, as he sides step closer.
"Then, riddle me this, fishlips," he says, leaning over, and enunciating with special care," can I see those--" each word drawn out, bitten off in tiny, spiteful pieces: "inky black roots under that terrible purple faux hawk?"
He just inches his brows right back up that very broad forehead and goes, "Hmm?"
Riddle him that, indeed.
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Not for the first time since waking up in a tube of slick liquid after being chainsawed in half, Eridan felt panic welling up in his chest. Unlike the other times, though, this isn't for just any old reason.
His roots can't be showing. He dyed his hair just before the game started! He'd wanted to look his best - oh cod, oh no, no, fuck that, this guy's just lying.
Eridan's face briefly flashes to panic before coming back to a more neutral expression. "You're fuckin' lyin'."
Pause. He leans in, getting right up in Megamind's face. "An' my name isn't. Fishlips."
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He buffs those nails of his-- kept short and well trimmed, but his hands were rough; you can't be an engineer with baby soft hands. It simply doesn't work that way. But they're as blue as the rest of them.
"Don't get angry when you get schooled in the yard of villainy, kiddo. Nobody can fault you for falling for it, really. You totally gave everything away," Mgeamind says, giving Eridan a look, totally unphased by the boy's closeness.
He drops his hands -- keeping them loose and empty. Eridan can't know he's armed, but Megamind is secure in being able to draw and get the kid cubed if it becomes necessary.
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Time for a well placed finger-jab to the chest. "Back off, scrawwny, an' go play your lil' wwiggler vversion'a evvildoin' somewwhere else." Mostly, though, he's just pissed he let his pokerface down.
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He looks Eridan over, patronizing in the extreme. But he finds the kid not-- quite wanting. There's potential here, it seems. "I don't know what a-- wwiggler is, but I do know this. I was creating mayhem and havoc before you were even bucking your fishy, evolutionary back end and making legs in your egg sac, kiddo."
He gestures to the hall. "All I need are the right tools, and this place will provide them! Look at it. A big, empty ship-- miles of deck, with secrets just WAITING to be coaxed out of it.... It's like a villain's dream come true."
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"That's not evven howw trolls are born, you racist beluga!" And he really wants to point out that he's singlehandedly destroyed his entire race with one well placed burst of white magic, but the last time he said that, he'd felt really... bad about it. (And then he'd gotten hit on. But that hadn't really helped matters.) "Wwe're born as grubs, not lil' fuckin' eggs. I'm a troll, not a salmon."
He does have a point about the ship, though. Even though Eridan doesn't really like the idea of being a villain, he does... see that there's a lot of potential here. If you're into that sort of thing. "An' wwhat are you gonna do wwith this fuckin' ship, huh? Bloww up a planet or somethin'? Been there, done that."
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"No. I plan something greater--" and much, much more personal. "But if you think I'm going to spoil it, you've got another thing coming."
He's going to find out what happened to his people, if it's the last thing he does.
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Eridan bristles and balls his hands into fists. He's not going to actually punch the other, mostly because he's pretty sure he's not fit for strifing at the moment, but still. That temptation is there. "Wwhat are you gonna do if someone else gets control'a this ship before you? Wwhat if I'vve got my owwn fuckin' plans?" He doesn't, because what is he going to do? Fly this thing back to his universe and... be dead there? Hell no. But he's a brash little asshole, so of course he's going to hypothetically try to take over the ship before someone else.
"An' just so you knoww, it's a lot fuckin' harder for just anybody to kill someone."
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He steps to the side, pulls up his watch, an gestures to the ship. "I'm a genius engineer. Trust me. Figuring out this place's secrets will be nothing. If you play your cards right--villain to villain-- we can strike a deal... let me set up the game, and you can set up the opposition. After alll, what's a villain with no nemesis? So far the rest of these people are all sniveling whiners and soft-headed idiots! You, at least..."
He's grinning broadly now. "You know the game."
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But then there are other things Megamind is saying that make Eridan even more confused than the whole "villain" thing. Stuff like nemesis, and opposition, and the insinuation that he's a better enemy than everyone else.
"...You mean that?" he asks, and he tries very hard not to look at least a little bit hopeful, because he knows that Kar always says he's way too fuckin' desperate and this guy... isn't really his type, concupiscently speaking, but hey. He can't be choosy all the time.
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Megamind has a good laugh at Shadow's expense, shaking his head as if the guy is some-- mentally challenged toddler, to be pitied for playing at a grown, thinking man's game.
"No, no. At the very least you have a leg upon banter," Megamind allows. "Even if you jump straight to the murder. I have eighty-eight life sentances, kid -- and I've never killed anyone. That's how bad I am. That's how much they fear me and what I could do to them, back home in Metrosity!"
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