A Poignant Letter from a Needy President
A friend of mine recently showed me this letter, and it really struck me that a lot of you probably haven't received this ardent plea from our dear president. I've reproduced the letter in full (removing some biographical information to protect an innocent Republican), and I hope it will encourage the whole lot of you to open your hearts (and your wallets) to such an honest gesture. Given the content, I'm nearly convinced he wrote it himself.
Wednesday Morning
Dear Mr. -----------,
The political season has arrived. Finally, we know who my opponent will be. I recently called Senator Kerry to congratulate him on winning his party's nomination. I told him I'm looking forward to a spirited campaign.
This should be an interesting debate. Senator Kerry has spent two decades in COngress; he's built up quite a record. In fact, Senator Kerry has been in Washington long enough to take both sides on just about every issue. He's been for the Patriot Act and against it; for NAFTA and against it; for the No Child Left Behind Act and against it; for the use of force in Iraq and against funding the liberation of Iraq. My opponent clearly has strong beliefs--they just don't last very long.
And the choice is clear. It's a choice between keeping the tax relief that is moving the economy forward, or stopping the recovery by putting the burden of higher taxes back on the American people.
It's the choice between an America that leads the world with strength and confidence or an America that is uncertain in the face of danger.
It's a choice that I will set squarely before the American people.
We've achieved great things. The last three years have brought serious challenges, and we have given serious answers. I look forward to telling the American people that.
Most importantly, we have a positive vision for winning the war against terror and for extending peace and freedom throughout our world; a positive vision for creating jobs and promoting opportunity and compassion here at home. We'll leave no doubt where we stand. And come November, we'll be reelected.
The stakes are high, and I need your help. Could you contribute $1,000, $500, $250, $100, $50, $35 or even $25 and make a difference in what could be a close election?
As a resident of -----------, you know the election will be hard fought in your state. A strong foundation has been laid for victory in 2004, but I need your help to win what could be a close election. Everything you send will help out TV buy--on national cable and on local stations. The ads are strong. They remind people of this Administration's accomplishments, and will lay out our positive agenda and contrast it with John Kerry's wrong votes and out-of-the-mainstream philosophy.
The other side has several attack groups, funded by large illegal "soft money" contributions from wealthy liberals, so I need your help today with a gift of $1,000, $500, $250, $100, $50, $35, or even $25 to keep ratcheting our TV effort up. Federal law allows gifts of up to $2,000 a person.
For all Americans, these years in our history will always stand apart. There are quiet times in the life of a nation when little is expected of the leaders. This isn't one of those times. You and I are living a period where the stakes are high, the challenges are difficult, and the choices are clear--a time when resolve is needed.
I hope you will help today. Thank you for your friendship and may God continue to bless America.
Sincerely,
[big blue illegible signature]
George W. Bush
Doesn't it just bring tears to your eyes? But I really do think W's voice comes through--if this is not really our president, it is a damned good impersonation.
There will be a prize to whoever can spot the most atrocities in this letter. I don't know what it will be yet, but trust me, it will be worth it.
As Bush reminded us several times in this letter, it could be a close election. So, when you go to cast your votes in November, I would like you to remember one thing, a slogan from a poster I saw someone holding down in Washington, D.C. this past weekend:
KERRY SUCKS LESS!!!
Wednesday Morning
Dear Mr. -----------,
The political season has arrived. Finally, we know who my opponent will be. I recently called Senator Kerry to congratulate him on winning his party's nomination. I told him I'm looking forward to a spirited campaign.
This should be an interesting debate. Senator Kerry has spent two decades in COngress; he's built up quite a record. In fact, Senator Kerry has been in Washington long enough to take both sides on just about every issue. He's been for the Patriot Act and against it; for NAFTA and against it; for the No Child Left Behind Act and against it; for the use of force in Iraq and against funding the liberation of Iraq. My opponent clearly has strong beliefs--they just don't last very long.
And the choice is clear. It's a choice between keeping the tax relief that is moving the economy forward, or stopping the recovery by putting the burden of higher taxes back on the American people.
It's the choice between an America that leads the world with strength and confidence or an America that is uncertain in the face of danger.
It's a choice that I will set squarely before the American people.
We've achieved great things. The last three years have brought serious challenges, and we have given serious answers. I look forward to telling the American people that.
Most importantly, we have a positive vision for winning the war against terror and for extending peace and freedom throughout our world; a positive vision for creating jobs and promoting opportunity and compassion here at home. We'll leave no doubt where we stand. And come November, we'll be reelected.
The stakes are high, and I need your help. Could you contribute $1,000, $500, $250, $100, $50, $35 or even $25 and make a difference in what could be a close election?
As a resident of -----------, you know the election will be hard fought in your state. A strong foundation has been laid for victory in 2004, but I need your help to win what could be a close election. Everything you send will help out TV buy--on national cable and on local stations. The ads are strong. They remind people of this Administration's accomplishments, and will lay out our positive agenda and contrast it with John Kerry's wrong votes and out-of-the-mainstream philosophy.
The other side has several attack groups, funded by large illegal "soft money" contributions from wealthy liberals, so I need your help today with a gift of $1,000, $500, $250, $100, $50, $35, or even $25 to keep ratcheting our TV effort up. Federal law allows gifts of up to $2,000 a person.
For all Americans, these years in our history will always stand apart. There are quiet times in the life of a nation when little is expected of the leaders. This isn't one of those times. You and I are living a period where the stakes are high, the challenges are difficult, and the choices are clear--a time when resolve is needed.
I hope you will help today. Thank you for your friendship and may God continue to bless America.
Sincerely,
[big blue illegible signature]
George W. Bush
Doesn't it just bring tears to your eyes? But I really do think W's voice comes through--if this is not really our president, it is a damned good impersonation.
There will be a prize to whoever can spot the most atrocities in this letter. I don't know what it will be yet, but trust me, it will be worth it.
As Bush reminded us several times in this letter, it could be a close election. So, when you go to cast your votes in November, I would like you to remember one thing, a slogan from a poster I saw someone holding down in Washington, D.C. this past weekend:
KERRY SUCKS LESS!!!