Spray-tans & Self-esteem
The second episode of Toddlers and Tiaras' second season was eminently more palatable than the first. For one thing, none of the girls appeared to be contemplating suicide, and none of the mothers were Baby Jane. As much as it galls me, the show did a lot to confirm one of my major suspicions: that the pageant industry is largely self-propagating, with one generation of contestants growing old and rearing the next. Everyone involved in the thing, from the mothers to the pageant coaches to the judges and pageant runners, seems to be an old hand at beauty pageants. It's pretty rare, based on the sample shown, to see someone with no prior connection to the pageant industry.
The reason I find this so galling is because it in and of itself is not a inappropriate system. Many organizations thrive on this kind of set-up, and there's nothing intrinsically negative about it. The problem with beauty pageants, as depicted in shows like this, is the somewhat unflinching "win-at-all-costs" attitude adopted by many of the stage mothers. The glamour shots, spray-on tans, overly sexualized routines, improbably expensive costumes...they're all simply accepted, universally and without question. So the girls are subjected to increasinly cruel cosmetic procedures (spray-on tans being the worst offender) due to the sheer fact that everyone else is doing it. One mother explicitly states that her daughter needs to be as "dark" as the other contestants, precipitating a hurried spray-tan session in the bathroom.
It would be funny if it weren't so sad.
All that it leads to is a self-destructive culture where younger and younger children are subjected to these sad, sad rituals. I think most people would agree that something extremely important is lost when children lack the capacity to choose that life for themselves. Since the majority of children participating in the pageants are as young as 2 years (and some notable exceptions are even younger), there's little chance that these children have expressed even semi-informed consent. At that point, it's difficult not to see how the children, regardless of their level of success within the competition, will bear the hallmarks of those trials for the rest of their lives. The form of competition on which pageants are based is a fundamentally different one from that of ordinary social relations, and bears more in common with reality television than real life. Impressing those values on a young child who isn't even aware of other viable systems (and when you raise your child in that environment from a young age, there's little question they project their experiences onto the larger world) instills a reliance on that system to the exclusion of others. Immersing a child in a pageant lifestyle must breed a dependence on the values required to succeed in such a system: physical beauty, exaggerated enthusiasm, a "stage persona" which can be turned on and off, a distrust of fellow competitors, etc.
Children need the option to choose, even on an instinctual level, to subscribe to lifestyles such as that. It takes an enormous amount of effort, drive and confidence to succeed, and many children can't withstand the pressure. Enrolling them in pageants from the age of 2 constructs their worldview in such a way that they remain unaware that there are other lifestyles. For these "pageant girls," pageants take over every aspect of their lives. It colours their ambitions, family dynamics, and sense of self-worth. It's fine if a 10-year-old tries out and decides she likes it, and it's even ok if a 5 or 6-year-old expresses an interest, but turning your two-year-old daughter into a glitter machine is just wrong. She's going to grow up without ever knowing any other way of life.
But I digress. I can't call these parents out for something that all parents do. And you could make a case that toddler pageants are functionally similar to little-league sports like Timbits soccer--although I would vehemently disagree and point out that there is no genuine competition in Timbits soccer, which serves as a springboard to more competitive leagues for players who discover an aptitude or enjoyment for the sport, while beauty pageants are inherently competitive and in the most superficial of ways.
Anyway, the saddest moment from this week came in the form of "Tootie," the stage name of an exceptionally vapid 10-year-old girl. After winning first in her age class but losing some other equally empty title, she sunk into a deep depression and refused to play along during the confessional. She professed to be extremely unhappy with her performance, claimed she felt nothing, and then plead that this conversation be omitted from the televised broadcast.
Maddeningly, Tootie had been the most reviled character for the whole episode, issuing orders to her mother like a drill sargeant and treating family friends like slaves. What the final confessional showed was precisely what toll was exerted on the psyches of these child beauty queens. Winning is imperative, and losing is unfathomable. When you parents are sinking upwards of $2500 per dress and first-place prize is usually only $1000, the pressure to win is enormous.
Also, the most revolting moment of the episode was the reveal that the three first-place finishers in their age classes would win a puppy for their efforts. A real, live animal. For toddlers, who may or may not have expressed any interest in owning an animal at all. As my friends and I commented, those poor puppies have about 6 months before they wind up on the streets, in a shelter, or at a bag filled with rocks at the bottom of the river.
Way to go, Toddlers & Tiaras!
The reason I find this so galling is because it in and of itself is not a inappropriate system. Many organizations thrive on this kind of set-up, and there's nothing intrinsically negative about it. The problem with beauty pageants, as depicted in shows like this, is the somewhat unflinching "win-at-all-costs" attitude adopted by many of the stage mothers. The glamour shots, spray-on tans, overly sexualized routines, improbably expensive costumes...they're all simply accepted, universally and without question. So the girls are subjected to increasinly cruel cosmetic procedures (spray-on tans being the worst offender) due to the sheer fact that everyone else is doing it. One mother explicitly states that her daughter needs to be as "dark" as the other contestants, precipitating a hurried spray-tan session in the bathroom.
It would be funny if it weren't so sad.
All that it leads to is a self-destructive culture where younger and younger children are subjected to these sad, sad rituals. I think most people would agree that something extremely important is lost when children lack the capacity to choose that life for themselves. Since the majority of children participating in the pageants are as young as 2 years (and some notable exceptions are even younger), there's little chance that these children have expressed even semi-informed consent. At that point, it's difficult not to see how the children, regardless of their level of success within the competition, will bear the hallmarks of those trials for the rest of their lives. The form of competition on which pageants are based is a fundamentally different one from that of ordinary social relations, and bears more in common with reality television than real life. Impressing those values on a young child who isn't even aware of other viable systems (and when you raise your child in that environment from a young age, there's little question they project their experiences onto the larger world) instills a reliance on that system to the exclusion of others. Immersing a child in a pageant lifestyle must breed a dependence on the values required to succeed in such a system: physical beauty, exaggerated enthusiasm, a "stage persona" which can be turned on and off, a distrust of fellow competitors, etc.
Children need the option to choose, even on an instinctual level, to subscribe to lifestyles such as that. It takes an enormous amount of effort, drive and confidence to succeed, and many children can't withstand the pressure. Enrolling them in pageants from the age of 2 constructs their worldview in such a way that they remain unaware that there are other lifestyles. For these "pageant girls," pageants take over every aspect of their lives. It colours their ambitions, family dynamics, and sense of self-worth. It's fine if a 10-year-old tries out and decides she likes it, and it's even ok if a 5 or 6-year-old expresses an interest, but turning your two-year-old daughter into a glitter machine is just wrong. She's going to grow up without ever knowing any other way of life.
But I digress. I can't call these parents out for something that all parents do. And you could make a case that toddler pageants are functionally similar to little-league sports like Timbits soccer--although I would vehemently disagree and point out that there is no genuine competition in Timbits soccer, which serves as a springboard to more competitive leagues for players who discover an aptitude or enjoyment for the sport, while beauty pageants are inherently competitive and in the most superficial of ways.
Anyway, the saddest moment from this week came in the form of "Tootie," the stage name of an exceptionally vapid 10-year-old girl. After winning first in her age class but losing some other equally empty title, she sunk into a deep depression and refused to play along during the confessional. She professed to be extremely unhappy with her performance, claimed she felt nothing, and then plead that this conversation be omitted from the televised broadcast.
Maddeningly, Tootie had been the most reviled character for the whole episode, issuing orders to her mother like a drill sargeant and treating family friends like slaves. What the final confessional showed was precisely what toll was exerted on the psyches of these child beauty queens. Winning is imperative, and losing is unfathomable. When you parents are sinking upwards of $2500 per dress and first-place prize is usually only $1000, the pressure to win is enormous.
Also, the most revolting moment of the episode was the reveal that the three first-place finishers in their age classes would win a puppy for their efforts. A real, live animal. For toddlers, who may or may not have expressed any interest in owning an animal at all. As my friends and I commented, those poor puppies have about 6 months before they wind up on the streets, in a shelter, or at a bag filled with rocks at the bottom of the river.
Way to go, Toddlers & Tiaras!