Exhausted.

Aug 06, 2008 01:29

Hi. I am a fifteen year old who recently learned of my Asperger's Syndrome (well, not officially, but the psychologist who evaluated me said the only reason she has not yet diagnosed me is because my mom told her that I would cry when people around me did, ergo showing empathy, which Aspies supposedly cannot have). I also have Anxiety Disorder and did have PTSD, but due to therapy I believe that's no longer a problem.
My family went to the ocean today, along with a friend of my brother's, and the three children total in the backseat with all their noise drove me to distraction. I get oversensitized quite easily at times. I asked them to stop repeatedly, but they really, I guess, weren't all that loud, I was just supersensitive. My brother's friend made me feel stupid by mocking me, and I ended up using ear plugs for half the drive.
Then at the ocean, my anxiety kicked in overtime when my brother and his friend went way out. I was going after them, telling them to PLEASE COME IN PLEASE PLEASE and getting worked up. The ocean scares me sometimes; there were these big waves and it was windy. Bro's friend said (somewhat accurately, because control calms me, but it hurt) that I just "need to control everything." I understand it's not totally his fault his comments are so hurtful to me, since he does not know of my problems, but I find these things hard to deal with. Then, when we went in the ocean again later, my brother actually got STUCK IN A RIP TIDE. I was yelling at him to swim sideways, but he couldn't hear me; the lifeguard ended up coming out. He's okay now. But I am so overwhelmed by today. I just...it's too much.
Sorry to vent on you all on my first post! D:

family, anxiety, sound, username: j, ptsd

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