What The Hell!?
There was an article in the Houston Press today about Jacob Calle's nearly-world-famous Scavenger Hunt. The article starts with Alex Campos punching Jacob in the eye and making him bleed profusely. That, in combination with Chris (Schroeder, not Calle) having seen Alex as the last one through that toll booth on his way to work the other day, prompted me to play some phone tag and get his number. We talked for fifteen minutes about everything and nothing, and have a tentative date to hang out with the boys at a bar on Fuqua next Thursday.
Alex, as you may know, is in no small part responsible for much of my cadence and timing when I'm being a smart-ass. But there's more to this story. What follows is the definitive history of the character development (not the character himself) of Alex Walker. I'll be damned if even the boys know the entire story.
The whole thing started back in 1995. Cobain was dead, the Power Rangers were still on their first series, and I lived in the middle of Nancy Street in north Pearland, over by Scooter's (which offered Beer-Pool; Hamburgers, making both me AND my brother think they had a swimming pool full of beer and that's why Mom didn't want us talking about it).
The whole thing about me becoming interested in music was due to three girls, believe it or not. One was the marginally cute white trash on the end of my street, who wore Nirvana and AC/DC shirts to school every day. Another was one of the outright prettiest girls I've ever met who was a total bitch one year and completely awesome from two years later until I lost track of once she moved to Orlando. The third was a rocker who thought I was an immature little shit (nolo contendre) who made me a mixtape of Operation Ivy and The Bouncing Souls (who eventually became a cheerleader). But I digress.
This does have a point, I swear. Anyway. Power Rangers and a rental of Mega Man VII gave me this cool idea in my head of a crack team of jetpack-wearing armored knights. The Turbo Knights, I believe they were called. Their leader (God, I was a geek) needed initials identical to his organization. His name, then, was Tucker Kilbourne, and he was Canadian. (I imagine this was the influence of Our Lady Peace back in the day. Hey, I'm gonna start BitTorrent-ing Clumsy. That album was halfway all right... OK, done.) With Star Fox 64 came a younger brother named Fox, who eventually became the new leader. (OK, maybe Chris does have a point about me changing the story a whole bunch.) The whole thing went nowhere fast, since all the friends involved in that project were total douchebags.
By this time, I had fallen in among the punks. Meeting Cole Adkins in the 7th grade was a big step here, because I recognized him the first day of high school and ate lunch with his crew on the floor of the cafeteria commons. Eventually, I met the upperclassmen punks, all of whom thought I was a loser. Except for the three most immature ones of all. Jacob Calle, his brother Chris, and their friend Alex Campos. Also, Wixon stuck me with the name Susan, which some of them still recognize to this day. During the tenure of our friendship, they would take me to Gringo's, bury a cheesy sound-and-light keychain light sword in an ice cream cone (and I would throw another at an old fart in a Mercury), and sing Happy Birthday in every style from the Ramones to Tito Puentes. Ah, the memories.
It's now the end of my freshman year. I decided that I was ditching that project and making another one entirely. What, I did not know. However, I needed a new character. I invented a punky-looking dude with a beanie and a goatee. He was a skateboarder, and I had an idea of him using this talent to break out of prison. Now all he needed was a name. I decided to adopt a Marilyn Manson-style dichotomy. (Short version: Name is half "coolest guy I know," half "biggest geek I know.") Who came to mind? Alex Campos was, by far, the funniest smartass I knew. And the biggest dork? My future boss, E. Walker Arenson, Esq. Alex Walker was named.
He needed a name that gave him the initials ARW, I decided. A really gay, embarassing, hippie name that only came up on official documents. Raine worked just fine. That name is about the only thing that hasn't changed in five years. ^_^()
Documenting every change from hence forward would be nigh impossible. In fact, when the consoles are off, we try to reconcile what I said last week with what I want to do now.
By the way, Michelle? I also noticed that a photograph Jacob took ended up on a bottle of Jones Orange Creme Soda. Did you ever see this?
Alex, as you may know, is in no small part responsible for much of my cadence and timing when I'm being a smart-ass. But there's more to this story. What follows is the definitive history of the character development (not the character himself) of Alex Walker. I'll be damned if even the boys know the entire story.
The whole thing started back in 1995. Cobain was dead, the Power Rangers were still on their first series, and I lived in the middle of Nancy Street in north Pearland, over by Scooter's (which offered Beer-Pool; Hamburgers, making both me AND my brother think they had a swimming pool full of beer and that's why Mom didn't want us talking about it).
The whole thing about me becoming interested in music was due to three girls, believe it or not. One was the marginally cute white trash on the end of my street, who wore Nirvana and AC/DC shirts to school every day. Another was one of the outright prettiest girls I've ever met who was a total bitch one year and completely awesome from two years later until I lost track of once she moved to Orlando. The third was a rocker who thought I was an immature little shit (nolo contendre) who made me a mixtape of Operation Ivy and The Bouncing Souls (who eventually became a cheerleader). But I digress.
This does have a point, I swear. Anyway. Power Rangers and a rental of Mega Man VII gave me this cool idea in my head of a crack team of jetpack-wearing armored knights. The Turbo Knights, I believe they were called. Their leader (God, I was a geek) needed initials identical to his organization. His name, then, was Tucker Kilbourne, and he was Canadian. (I imagine this was the influence of Our Lady Peace back in the day. Hey, I'm gonna start BitTorrent-ing Clumsy. That album was halfway all right... OK, done.) With Star Fox 64 came a younger brother named Fox, who eventually became the new leader. (OK, maybe Chris does have a point about me changing the story a whole bunch.) The whole thing went nowhere fast, since all the friends involved in that project were total douchebags.
By this time, I had fallen in among the punks. Meeting Cole Adkins in the 7th grade was a big step here, because I recognized him the first day of high school and ate lunch with his crew on the floor of the cafeteria commons. Eventually, I met the upperclassmen punks, all of whom thought I was a loser. Except for the three most immature ones of all. Jacob Calle, his brother Chris, and their friend Alex Campos. Also, Wixon stuck me with the name Susan, which some of them still recognize to this day. During the tenure of our friendship, they would take me to Gringo's, bury a cheesy sound-and-light keychain light sword in an ice cream cone (and I would throw another at an old fart in a Mercury), and sing Happy Birthday in every style from the Ramones to Tito Puentes. Ah, the memories.
It's now the end of my freshman year. I decided that I was ditching that project and making another one entirely. What, I did not know. However, I needed a new character. I invented a punky-looking dude with a beanie and a goatee. He was a skateboarder, and I had an idea of him using this talent to break out of prison. Now all he needed was a name. I decided to adopt a Marilyn Manson-style dichotomy. (Short version: Name is half "coolest guy I know," half "biggest geek I know.") Who came to mind? Alex Campos was, by far, the funniest smartass I knew. And the biggest dork? My future boss, E. Walker Arenson, Esq. Alex Walker was named.
He needed a name that gave him the initials ARW, I decided. A really gay, embarassing, hippie name that only came up on official documents. Raine worked just fine. That name is about the only thing that hasn't changed in five years. ^_^()
Documenting every change from hence forward would be nigh impossible. In fact, when the consoles are off, we try to reconcile what I said last week with what I want to do now.
By the way, Michelle? I also noticed that a photograph Jacob took ended up on a bottle of Jones Orange Creme Soda. Did you ever see this?
