Don't Ask Me About North Wales
I was pleased to discover this morning that I am no longer the only person on the internet who is interested in Welsh tourism!
Although I am acting under the assumption that none of my comrades are also Information Centre employees and/or agents of a top-secret organisation fronted by the Welsh Tourism Board. If you are, don't tell me, I probably don't have clearance for that kind of thing. Also, ask headquarters to send me some new brochures on Brecon Beacons National Park, as the current ones are out of date and do not contain sufficient warnings regarding your likelihood of encountering cannibals.
Brecon Beacons: You Might Not Get Eaten!
Gwen complains a lot about how that camping trip made her lose her naivete but at the time I was busy being tenderised and unable to help Jack protect her from life's little tragedies, so I don't feel too guilty.
My point is, essentially, that southern Wales is a pleasant place to holiday, and as long as you stay within the Cardiff city limits you are 99% unlikely to be eaten by cannibals*. You are, however, 80% more likely to get laid than anywhere else in Wales**.
Come to Cardiff! Bring your umbrella!
* Statistic does not apply to Raxacoricofallipatorians, mutants of any description, or sex mist.
** Statistic is anecdotal but pretty well proven by the Ianto Jones Institute Of Have You Met Captain Jack Harkness.
Although I am acting under the assumption that none of my comrades are also Information Centre employees and/or agents of a top-secret organisation fronted by the Welsh Tourism Board. If you are, don't tell me, I probably don't have clearance for that kind of thing. Also, ask headquarters to send me some new brochures on Brecon Beacons National Park, as the current ones are out of date and do not contain sufficient warnings regarding your likelihood of encountering cannibals.
Brecon Beacons: You Might Not Get Eaten!
Gwen complains a lot about how that camping trip made her lose her naivete but at the time I was busy being tenderised and unable to help Jack protect her from life's little tragedies, so I don't feel too guilty.
My point is, essentially, that southern Wales is a pleasant place to holiday, and as long as you stay within the Cardiff city limits you are 99% unlikely to be eaten by cannibals*. You are, however, 80% more likely to get laid than anywhere else in Wales**.
Come to Cardiff! Bring your umbrella!
* Statistic does not apply to Raxacoricofallipatorians, mutants of any description, or sex mist.
** Statistic is anecdotal but pretty well proven by the Ianto Jones Institute Of Have You Met Captain Jack Harkness.