Just for Memory's Sake...
heya,
I dunno... I guess I should try to clear up some stuff.
These past few months have been really something else. Heh, there's really no other way to say it. I got to know you as a really good friend, and that's what was the best part of everything. And now, I guess I was too naive to see everything. Or at least, I was too stubborn in not wanting to deal with something that I knew I would have to.
You know, if I really think about things, I think that we went through the exact same things.
So when you say that I led you on, when I think about it more clearly, I'm a little right and you're a little right. In all honesty, there were times that I liked you in that way, especially within the last week. Every time that I held you, watching you go to sleep, I wished that I could take care of you and notlet anything bad happen to you.
And yet, I knew that it couldn't happen. So what I did was something stupid. I would struggle between the two. And so I settled on something "in between." I saw you as a sister, someone that I could tell anything to, someone that I could be close to.
Heh...and now that I think about it, that's probably not a good idea. In the past, I saw my ex as a a "mei mei." And yeah, we ended up going out. The whole time that things have been hapening, I think I realized it in the back of my head that I was starting to like you.
Heh, if only we weren't Christians (and I use that term loosely)...
But we are. And my spiritual life isn't where I know it can be. So I can't dare date you, you know? I honestly believe that I WANT to...but I know that we can't.
And so, there it is. I think I've begun to fall for you as well. That's why I would tell you bits and parts of my thoughts. Remember when I said that things have changed? That when people ask, "Would you two ever go out?" my answer now is, "Maybe," instead of "No way!"? Heh, now you know why.
So I've fallen for you. And yet, I know that we can't date, because I know what's best for us is to not date now.
I'm sorry. I should've figured this out a long time ago.
I dunno... I guess I should try to clear up some stuff.
These past few months have been really something else. Heh, there's really no other way to say it. I got to know you as a really good friend, and that's what was the best part of everything. And now, I guess I was too naive to see everything. Or at least, I was too stubborn in not wanting to deal with something that I knew I would have to.
You know, if I really think about things, I think that we went through the exact same things.
So when you say that I led you on, when I think about it more clearly, I'm a little right and you're a little right. In all honesty, there were times that I liked you in that way, especially within the last week. Every time that I held you, watching you go to sleep, I wished that I could take care of you and notlet anything bad happen to you.
And yet, I knew that it couldn't happen. So what I did was something stupid. I would struggle between the two. And so I settled on something "in between." I saw you as a sister, someone that I could tell anything to, someone that I could be close to.
Heh...and now that I think about it, that's probably not a good idea. In the past, I saw my ex as a a "mei mei." And yeah, we ended up going out. The whole time that things have been hapening, I think I realized it in the back of my head that I was starting to like you.
Heh, if only we weren't Christians (and I use that term loosely)...
But we are. And my spiritual life isn't where I know it can be. So I can't dare date you, you know? I honestly believe that I WANT to...but I know that we can't.
And so, there it is. I think I've begun to fall for you as well. That's why I would tell you bits and parts of my thoughts. Remember when I said that things have changed? That when people ask, "Would you two ever go out?" my answer now is, "Maybe," instead of "No way!"? Heh, now you know why.
So I've fallen for you. And yet, I know that we can't date, because I know what's best for us is to not date now.
I'm sorry. I should've figured this out a long time ago.