Chase Bank Blows
I've never gotten along too well with banks. Most fights I've had with them are really my fault, and I just hate that they're not as forgiving as my mom.
I hate my bank so much right now. Or maybe just Brooklyn.
I changed to Chase from Bank of Oklahoma in late June, well over a month before I moved. Every single minute, every single interaction I had with Chase, I mentioned that I was changing because I was moving and I wanted a national bank. Bullshit. Chase, Citi, Bank of America are not national banks. 50 separate banks that interact as a national unity. Why did we not get a national bank in America? Fuck that president.
I presented my bank with a check for just under $3000 on October 5th. Assuming (you know, since it was good, and because the issuing and the cashing bank are about a half-mile from each other) it would be credited the following day, I set up a credit card payment for the next day, wrote a rent check, a bill check, and went grocery shopping. October 6th I had no money, so I called and was ASSURED it would be there by the end of Saturday. I obviously should have asked some more questions then, cuz what bank is doing transactions like that on Saturday. Chase told me to spend as normal, and everything would work out on Tuesday. (Monday was a banking holiday.) Well, good, because I spent the weekend in Pennsylvania and Delaware.
Friday October 13th. I still don't have a credit back. Jake Armstrong and I have been planning to go that night for weeks, so I walked to the bank and took out some money is my savings account, and a check from my grandmother. My checking account is like -$800, since they said writing rent checks, eating, etc, were just fine. I know it's unlikely to get a check cashed when you're checking account is negative, so I specifically talked to a real banker over a teller.
I explained my situation for about the 600th time, and was told that my check had a hold not because it was an unusually high amount, but because my account was an "Oklahoma" account. I'm glad someone mentioned this when I changed my address. Also, there is absolutely no way in hell to make it a New York account. She also told me if she cashed my grandmother's check she was doing it "as a favor". That may be true, but don't ever call out anyone's grandmother as a sketch check writer. Bitch. She has more money than you ever will.
I thought this banker was typically unhelpful, but then!!!! she said,
"Open a new checking account. This one will be New York account, and there won't be any state to state holds anymore."
"But I don't want a new debit card, or new linked credit card..."
"Oh, no problem. I'll link this new account to the old debit card. It will primarily draw from the new New York account, but you could access ATM funds with one card from either account."
"Oh, okay. That's a real solution. Thanks."
Fuck her. That was all lies. Lies Lies Lies. After depositing another $3000 check into my brand new New York account, I bought some coffee. And it worked!!
Actually, it didn't. The $3.80 Breakfast Blend and Maple Muffin were the last $4 of my overdraft protection credit card from my old Oklahoma account. So when I went to American Apparel, I was declined. That is so embarrassing and I never let it happen on my own accord. So I walk to this storefront of Chase ATMs, and decided I'll just take cash from my new account. It's not there. So my cards were never linked. Then I spent about an hour on the phone with both the national number and the branch figuring out who's telling the biggest lies. The national number tells me the debit linked to the new account is in the mail. Local branch told me she would try again to link them. Well, she couldn't. I hate her. I feel totally duped. Now I have two checking accounts with a bank I hate, and they're still sitting on $6000. Of course, I'll have to make another call when everything clears, because I'm sure the fees accumulated will not disappear until I hold them to it.
I'm most pissed because I knew about everything. I knew that I was moving, I knew that I would have several large checks from New York banks over the semester. Had anyone mentioned these problems, I would have opened my account in New York. I used to really like Chase. The Norman branch is great. They know me, and know Rocky's my boyfriend. They ask us about the other. I get emails or calls about any activity I want. Their overdraft plan (although I've never had cause to use it legitimately) is better than most banks. I have great hope that everything will be fixed tomorrow morning (save the fees), but I'm not holding my breath.