Can't get around it.
So...Robb and I are done. For good this time. I think it was slightly a mutal thing. But moreso me. I've been a complete bitch to him lately. I think it's just my unconcious mind thinking he's cheating, doesn't have interest in me anymore ect ect.
I doubt this is even true...but I think me kinda breaking things off with him first makes me feel better. He can't hurt me if I do it first kinda thing. I want to be with him....it's just not working, at all.
He doesn't ever make an effort to do anything. We never talk. He goes out with his friends like all the time, doesn't invite me or even talk to me about going out. We don't do anything when were together anyhow, besides lay there in awkward silence and than eventually he trys to get into my pants until I give in or just reject him than he goes home.
Our relationship is based on nothing except were comfortable. He's always been with me because I've always been there. I live across the street so it's easy to be with me. It's easy to call me over when your horny or bored. He says he loves me, but I don't think so.
I was so willing to make it work. But he just didn't seem interested in it at all. He wanted his freedom all the time, and I gave it too him.
I just wonder if I didn't give him freedom if he woulda been more committed to me. I mean it's only been what like 4 weeks since I've been back in Windsor and I already feel my world crumbling.
Sometimes I just don't feel like I have a place anywhere. And I always feel alone when Robb and I have fights, but now that it's completely done...I am actually gonna be alone for good now.
My friends are awesome, like I mean they are always around it's not like they don't support me, but I dunno...I get annoyed with them too much. Which makes me question alot of things. Like maybe I'm the one who's jsut a huge bitch and deserves nothing. And perhaps that's why nothing good ever happens too me.
I think I should just focus all my negitive engery into work and school for now. I think that'll work in my favour. I'm even contemplating transfering schools....moving back home, going to Brock? Although I know their Dred program bites the dust. So that would suck alot.
Would that really be my answer though? Running away from here just because things aren't going my way?
Blah I'm so confused about everything right now. I just don't know what to do. I hate myself and my life right now.
Why can't things be easier??????????
I doubt this is even true...but I think me kinda breaking things off with him first makes me feel better. He can't hurt me if I do it first kinda thing. I want to be with him....it's just not working, at all.
He doesn't ever make an effort to do anything. We never talk. He goes out with his friends like all the time, doesn't invite me or even talk to me about going out. We don't do anything when were together anyhow, besides lay there in awkward silence and than eventually he trys to get into my pants until I give in or just reject him than he goes home.
Our relationship is based on nothing except were comfortable. He's always been with me because I've always been there. I live across the street so it's easy to be with me. It's easy to call me over when your horny or bored. He says he loves me, but I don't think so.
I was so willing to make it work. But he just didn't seem interested in it at all. He wanted his freedom all the time, and I gave it too him.
I just wonder if I didn't give him freedom if he woulda been more committed to me. I mean it's only been what like 4 weeks since I've been back in Windsor and I already feel my world crumbling.
Sometimes I just don't feel like I have a place anywhere. And I always feel alone when Robb and I have fights, but now that it's completely done...I am actually gonna be alone for good now.
My friends are awesome, like I mean they are always around it's not like they don't support me, but I dunno...I get annoyed with them too much. Which makes me question alot of things. Like maybe I'm the one who's jsut a huge bitch and deserves nothing. And perhaps that's why nothing good ever happens too me.
I think I should just focus all my negitive engery into work and school for now. I think that'll work in my favour. I'm even contemplating transfering schools....moving back home, going to Brock? Although I know their Dred program bites the dust. So that would suck alot.
Would that really be my answer though? Running away from here just because things aren't going my way?
Blah I'm so confused about everything right now. I just don't know what to do. I hate myself and my life right now.
Why can't things be easier??????????