(no subject)
I'm currently stuck in the middle. I have no reason to stay, yet I have no reason to leave. There are no benefits to moving away from this place, nor are there any to staying. I know what I want but it is all a matter of luck and circumstance and I think I've run out of luck for my lifetime.
Why do I feel like getting a job here is giving up? And why if the only reasons I can justify my staying here are so laughable can I not justify packing up and moving?
As my safety net keeps wearing thinner and thinner, I'm beginning to feel more like a nothing.
And I oh so hate that I can't really tell how I'm feeling..that I can't put it in words and say what I want to say.
Not that I know what I want to say.
I want you to love me..and I know you do. But that must not be what I really want because it doesn't feel like enough.
Why do I feel like getting a job here is giving up? And why if the only reasons I can justify my staying here are so laughable can I not justify packing up and moving?
As my safety net keeps wearing thinner and thinner, I'm beginning to feel more like a nothing.
And I oh so hate that I can't really tell how I'm feeling..that I can't put it in words and say what I want to say.
Not that I know what I want to say.
I want you to love me..and I know you do. But that must not be what I really want because it doesn't feel like enough.