????
I sometimes hate being single. I love being with someone more than anything but when I'm single I get to flirt and hang out with whoever I want. But I've been single for not even a month yet and there are so many guys that are either interested in me or that I'm interested in. It's so overwhelming. I don't know what to do. I don't want to step on anybody's toes by hanging out with the "wrong" people. I just want to be whatever with whoever. But it seems like that doesn't work. I am not used to this college guy/girl relationship where you hang out and your just friends. I never did that in high school. If I was hanging out with a guy it was because I was his girlfriend. I don't know how to act in this relationship, especially when I know they like me. Or if I know I like them. This isn't refering to just one person either. There are two. One likes me a lot but he kind of freaked me out so I am not so much interested, not like that anyways. The other I like a lot, and I am pretty sure he likes me too, but at the same time I don't know how to act in this situation. I have NEVER, EVER been around a guy that I like and he likes me back but there isn't anything between us but friendship. I don't know how to take this. I'm so confused because I just want to run up to him and give him a hug or something but I don't know if that would be acceptable. Should I just say hi, should I avoid him altogether? I just don't know. I don't want a relationship right now, with anyone, so it's not like I'm trying to hook up with him but I just don't know how to act. I don't feel comfortable around anyone right now. I just want to lock myself in my room so I don't have to be around anything. I know that I'm obsessing about this way to much but it's all I can think about. Especially this week being recruitment, I am surrounded by it everyday. And I don't want anyone to think that I don't want to hang out with them or I don't want to be around them, I just want this bad aura to go away. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I don't want to hurt myself either. I just want to be happy but I don't want to hurt someone else just so I can be happy either. I would rather be unhappy in my life then make someone else be unhappy. If that makes any sense. And now I feel bad because I am being a jerk about it and won't go over to hang out with these people because I think it will be to awkward for them and for me. I don't wish that it didn't happen but I just wish the circumstances didn't suck so badly. I don't know what else to say without repeating myself a hundred times so I am going to stop talking....I have lots of french to do... goodnight..