i think i'm more interesting when i'm angsty...
went to the swing dance last night. the entire situation is rather amusing. i got a ticket yesterday morning before chapel, and here's my summary of how:
shelby: going to the swing dance?
me: don't have a ticket.
shelby: do you want to go?
me: well i--
shelby: my roommate has a ticket, but she can't go. want her ticket?
me: uh--
shelby's roommate: *walks up* hey. what's going on?
shelby: lauren doesn't have a ticket to the swing dance.
shelby's roomamte: oh, here. take mine.
me: but i--
shelby: c'mon, it'll be fun.
me: i don't have my wallet--
shelby's roommate: don't worry about it.
me: ...what time is it?
so yeah. that was entertaining. so was the swing dance. granted, i consider any occasion where i end up hanging out with someone whose name i cannot remember for the LIFE of me vaguely amusing. so i run into this guy i know, who also happens to be dance partner-less. he's a cute kid, but i think he has a crush on me and it kinda weirds me out. here's why:
1) anyone who is more sheltered than i am clueless kinda weirds me out on general principle. and let me tell you, this kid is a computer and a microwave away from being amish. (nothing against them, mind you, though i doubt any will be reading my livejournal anytime soon...)
2) he's a year or two younger than me, and it *shows.* not that he's immature in an "lol you said fart!" kind of way, but... gosh the kid is clueless. O_o i always feel like i have to take care of him when i'm around him, in a big sister/motherly kind of way, and in light of that the fact that he has a crush on me this makes me feel creepy.
3) he talks. and doesn't stop. EVAR. >_O and he's trying to be charming, and interesting, and doing it badly. i wouldn't really know, as no one hit on me in highschool, but i think most guys started talking to girls by then. i don't think he did.
4) well, this isn't his fault, but i can't remember his name. his brother's name is joe, but that doesn't really help me.
5) he's skinnier than i am, and he weighs less. i'm shallow, so that weirds me out. or maybe that goes back to the "kid" thing.
as i said, he's a cute kid, but he gives off just that impression: KID. i used to watch kids for some friends of my family, and i feel about the same way about him as i do those kids. keep him out of trouble, make sure he eats something, try and set him up with a nice girl (which i did, since i had to leave the dance early), etc.
rawr. and such. oh well, dancing was fun. *shrugs* and i can't have everything. where would i put it?
afterwards, i went to hang out with some friends, one of whom is making up his own campaign setting for a role-playing game. i'm gonna be a pilot. ^_^ this makes me happy.
seriously though, i think i'm more interesting when i'm angsty. and i tend to write more when i'm angsty. for one, when i'm happy, i don't really feel the need to "deal" with it in some way. when i'm sad, i like to try to work things out, understand where certain feelings come from, and sometimes i actually want just a little comfort. two, writing is very cathartic for me. so is drawing. lots of my decent drawings from highschool are dark or depressing, because those were the feelings i didn't know how to express and thus the ones i put the most work into. ask the people i knew in highschool, i always had a smile for everyone. even when i was sad, i'd at least give a weak smile when someone said "hi," so that they'd know i was happy to see them. and... blah. my brain is fried. more thoughts on this later, perhaps. i'm gonna go get something to eat. >_O
shelby: going to the swing dance?
me: don't have a ticket.
shelby: do you want to go?
me: well i--
shelby: my roommate has a ticket, but she can't go. want her ticket?
me: uh--
shelby's roommate: *walks up* hey. what's going on?
shelby: lauren doesn't have a ticket to the swing dance.
shelby's roomamte: oh, here. take mine.
me: but i--
shelby: c'mon, it'll be fun.
me: i don't have my wallet--
shelby's roommate: don't worry about it.
me: ...what time is it?
so yeah. that was entertaining. so was the swing dance. granted, i consider any occasion where i end up hanging out with someone whose name i cannot remember for the LIFE of me vaguely amusing. so i run into this guy i know, who also happens to be dance partner-less. he's a cute kid, but i think he has a crush on me and it kinda weirds me out. here's why:
1) anyone who is more sheltered than i am clueless kinda weirds me out on general principle. and let me tell you, this kid is a computer and a microwave away from being amish. (nothing against them, mind you, though i doubt any will be reading my livejournal anytime soon...)
2) he's a year or two younger than me, and it *shows.* not that he's immature in an "lol you said fart!" kind of way, but... gosh the kid is clueless. O_o i always feel like i have to take care of him when i'm around him, in a big sister/motherly kind of way, and in light of that the fact that he has a crush on me this makes me feel creepy.
3) he talks. and doesn't stop. EVAR. >_O and he's trying to be charming, and interesting, and doing it badly. i wouldn't really know, as no one hit on me in highschool, but i think most guys started talking to girls by then. i don't think he did.
4) well, this isn't his fault, but i can't remember his name. his brother's name is joe, but that doesn't really help me.
5) he's skinnier than i am, and he weighs less. i'm shallow, so that weirds me out. or maybe that goes back to the "kid" thing.
as i said, he's a cute kid, but he gives off just that impression: KID. i used to watch kids for some friends of my family, and i feel about the same way about him as i do those kids. keep him out of trouble, make sure he eats something, try and set him up with a nice girl (which i did, since i had to leave the dance early), etc.
rawr. and such. oh well, dancing was fun. *shrugs* and i can't have everything. where would i put it?
afterwards, i went to hang out with some friends, one of whom is making up his own campaign setting for a role-playing game. i'm gonna be a pilot. ^_^ this makes me happy.
seriously though, i think i'm more interesting when i'm angsty. and i tend to write more when i'm angsty. for one, when i'm happy, i don't really feel the need to "deal" with it in some way. when i'm sad, i like to try to work things out, understand where certain feelings come from, and sometimes i actually want just a little comfort. two, writing is very cathartic for me. so is drawing. lots of my decent drawings from highschool are dark or depressing, because those were the feelings i didn't know how to express and thus the ones i put the most work into. ask the people i knew in highschool, i always had a smile for everyone. even when i was sad, i'd at least give a weak smile when someone said "hi," so that they'd know i was happy to see them. and... blah. my brain is fried. more thoughts on this later, perhaps. i'm gonna go get something to eat. >_O