HOMEWORK WHAT'S HOMEWORK SOUNDS LAME
We interrupt your afternoon to bring you DUMB THINGS ABBEY HAD BEEN DOING ON THE INTERNET, AND HOW YOU CAN TOO!
Last night I decided to snoop around zarla's journal for a bit, and I found an entry she made featuring these two websites. The first takes 2-5 names you give it and randomly generates a relationship map based on - I think - the spelling of the names. It's a little bit Engrish-y, and as you can imagine is unintentionally hilarious about 90% of the time. The second is similar - it takes 1-20 names and creates a floorplan for a house where all these people live. It wouldn't be that interesting, except that the thing occasionally puts random people in the same bedroom, and then fills out the house with these absolutely RIDICULOUS Engrish-y rooms. Well. You'll see, because I MADE A BUNCH and screencapped them and now you get to see the most hilarious ones.
I started with some of my own characters, from my space druggies NaNo. Probably won't be interesting for you, but I'll explain it a bit. DON'T WORRY THE FANDOMY ONES ARE COMING LATER.
Okay, so first off, the fact that Joss and Shay are listed as "accoplices" makes me REALLY REALLY HAPPY because they were the ones who started the group and they're best friends forever and I love their relationship. <3 Other funny things...well, Shay and Rian are, um, "strip friends," apparently, which, pfffft, is a very new interpretation for me. And if Joss was told that she was "subordinate" to Hart she would probably cut a bitch. (If you were interested in the canon relationships, Hart and Rian are fucking (and a little angsty), and Joss and Krys are a couple.)
NEXT UP: COMMUNITY. I did both a map and a floorplan for them.
JEFF/TROY BOY LOVER AHAHAHAHAHA SO TRUE. And Troy being Abed's bodyguard is...a-awwwwwww <3. Jeff/Britta being "less than lovers" is surprisingly accurate. This whole map is surprisingly accurate, actually.
PIERCE AND JEFF SHARING A ROOM GOD WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THAT DISASTER HAPPEN. And, um, now you see why these maps are so funny. I THINK MOST OF THESE ROOMS SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES.
I like that a quarter of the house is taken up by Shirley's Pool. NOBODY ELSE IS ALLOWED IN. JUST SHIRLEY.
Next up, Marauders! Just a floorplan for them.
SIRIUS'S PREMATURE EJACULATION CLINIC. JAMES'S OBSCENE COMIC SHOW ROOM. PETER'S FIGHT UNDERWEAR MAKE ROOM (I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE HELL THAT MEANS). IT'S JUST SO BEAUTIFUL I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT.
Ouran next? YEP. Both were interesting in this case.
Okay who else saw "miracle" between Haruhi and Tamaki and wanted to cry a little bit? JUST ME THEN? <3 Hikaru/Kaoru best couple is...a little bit too horribly accurate. OW MY EMOTIONS WHY DID I MAKE THIS MAP. Kyoya/Kaoru sex friend just make me really happy because HOW DID YOU GET INSIDE MY HEADCANON, SERIOUSLY.
I seriously do not know how this generator knew to put Tamaki/Haruhi and Hikaru/Kaoru in the same bedrooms. And Tamaki gets a giant private bathroom. OF COURSE YOU DO, DARLING. <3 Kyoya, of course, runs a Love Guidance Clinic and charges exhorbitantly but doesn't actually know how to give this advice AT ALL, and he pretends to be annoyed when Tamaki sweeps in and waxes poetic at his clients but secretly he's glad he doesn't have to make up some bullshit this time.
Okay, and then I made Firefly...
Accurate things: Sadomasochism between Mal and Inara (because seriously, who else fits Kiss With A Fist so freaking well?), Simon and Kaylee being sweethearts <3. Funny things: apparently Mal and Simon are "body touch friends?" PFFFFFTAHAHAHA WHAT. Interesting things: Now I want an AU where it's just Inara who picks up River and Simon, and she employs River as her bodyguard, and I dont' know why but I feel like that would make a really interesting story. AND THEN SIMON HAS TO GO UNDECOVER AS A COMPANION YES OKAY THIS STORY NEEDS TO HAPPEN. :D
River and Kaylee's bedroom! D'awww! And oh my god, Simon with Mal and Jayne with Inara would cause the MOST EXPLOSIONS EVER. Also, for some reason "Jayne's Room" and "Mal's Hall" make me laugh.
The Social Network time!
Mark/Eduardo OW OW ALL OF MY FEELINGS FOREVER ;_____________;. And Chris/Dustin...oh my god, I have seen so many fics where that's how Chris sees their relationship, because Dustin is all LALALA :DDD because he's Dustin, but then there's a happy ending because this is fanfiction. <3
Chris Hughes is Better Than You. He has important business to do and can't be bothered by your silly antics. ALSO EDUARDO'S FIRST AID STATION GOD THAT SHOULD NOT HURT AS MUCH AS IT DOES
Almost done! Just three floorplans left.
SCOTT PILGRIM:
STEPHEN/JOSEPH. WALLACE/SCOTT. I LOVE THIS GENERATOR. But Ramona/Knives ahaha BAD IDEA. For some reason Joseph's Excuse Training Room seems extremely in-character, even if I have no idea what it means. And Knives's dining room...*rimshot*.
HAVEMERCY AIRMEN:
All of the roommate combinations here are SUCH BAD IDEAS. Luvander's Exhibition Room is...about as porn-y sounding as this ENTIRE FANDOM, so I approve. <3 Thom gets his own kitchen, which is really cute. And of course the majority of the house is taken up by Rook's Balcony, because OUR BALCONY SCENE BEATS UP YOUR BALCONY SCENE. :D
AAAND FINALLY...TWEENDOM:
I literally just picked the first twenty names that came to mind. For some reason, Ariana and Gregg sharing a room strikes me as REALLY CUTE - she'd talk at him about Harry Potter and they'd talk about their completely sexy significant others and it would be the best ever. And then they'd hang out in Gregg's Great Hall because oh Gregg, honey, you are the most British. Liz's Clubroom is the SEXIEST PLACE IN THE HOUSE. Devon's Counterfeit Note Make Room is...completely unsurprising. Kendall and Dillon share a room and Dillon is a dirty hipster in training and it is the best. Drake has a Hangar, because, well, why wouldn't he? Aaand Logan has a Chlamidia Clinic because SOMEBODY needs to keep this house under control. And of course Miranda has an Information Desk. That's why it's so big. It's full of SECRETS. XD
OKAY OKAY I'M DONE
YOU CAN GO BACK TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED DAYS
Last night I decided to snoop around zarla's journal for a bit, and I found an entry she made featuring these two websites. The first takes 2-5 names you give it and randomly generates a relationship map based on - I think - the spelling of the names. It's a little bit Engrish-y, and as you can imagine is unintentionally hilarious about 90% of the time. The second is similar - it takes 1-20 names and creates a floorplan for a house where all these people live. It wouldn't be that interesting, except that the thing occasionally puts random people in the same bedroom, and then fills out the house with these absolutely RIDICULOUS Engrish-y rooms. Well. You'll see, because I MADE A BUNCH and screencapped them and now you get to see the most hilarious ones.
I started with some of my own characters, from my space druggies NaNo. Probably won't be interesting for you, but I'll explain it a bit. DON'T WORRY THE FANDOMY ONES ARE COMING LATER.
Okay, so first off, the fact that Joss and Shay are listed as "accoplices" makes me REALLY REALLY HAPPY because they were the ones who started the group and they're best friends forever and I love their relationship. <3 Other funny things...well, Shay and Rian are, um, "strip friends," apparently, which, pfffft, is a very new interpretation for me. And if Joss was told that she was "subordinate" to Hart she would probably cut a bitch. (If you were interested in the canon relationships, Hart and Rian are fucking (and a little angsty), and Joss and Krys are a couple.)
NEXT UP: COMMUNITY. I did both a map and a floorplan for them.
JEFF/TROY BOY LOVER AHAHAHAHAHA SO TRUE. And Troy being Abed's bodyguard is...a-awwwwwww <3. Jeff/Britta being "less than lovers" is surprisingly accurate. This whole map is surprisingly accurate, actually.
PIERCE AND JEFF SHARING A ROOM GOD WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THAT DISASTER HAPPEN. And, um, now you see why these maps are so funny. I THINK MOST OF THESE ROOMS SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES.
I like that a quarter of the house is taken up by Shirley's Pool. NOBODY ELSE IS ALLOWED IN. JUST SHIRLEY.
Next up, Marauders! Just a floorplan for them.
SIRIUS'S PREMATURE EJACULATION CLINIC. JAMES'S OBSCENE COMIC SHOW ROOM. PETER'S FIGHT UNDERWEAR MAKE ROOM (I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE HELL THAT MEANS). IT'S JUST SO BEAUTIFUL I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT.
Ouran next? YEP. Both were interesting in this case.
Okay who else saw "miracle" between Haruhi and Tamaki and wanted to cry a little bit? JUST ME THEN? <3 Hikaru/Kaoru best couple is...a little bit too horribly accurate. OW MY EMOTIONS WHY DID I MAKE THIS MAP. Kyoya/Kaoru sex friend just make me really happy because HOW DID YOU GET INSIDE MY HEADCANON, SERIOUSLY.
I seriously do not know how this generator knew to put Tamaki/Haruhi and Hikaru/Kaoru in the same bedrooms. And Tamaki gets a giant private bathroom. OF COURSE YOU DO, DARLING. <3 Kyoya, of course, runs a Love Guidance Clinic and charges exhorbitantly but doesn't actually know how to give this advice AT ALL, and he pretends to be annoyed when Tamaki sweeps in and waxes poetic at his clients but secretly he's glad he doesn't have to make up some bullshit this time.
Okay, and then I made Firefly...
Accurate things: Sadomasochism between Mal and Inara (because seriously, who else fits Kiss With A Fist so freaking well?), Simon and Kaylee being sweethearts <3. Funny things: apparently Mal and Simon are "body touch friends?" PFFFFFTAHAHAHA WHAT. Interesting things: Now I want an AU where it's just Inara who picks up River and Simon, and she employs River as her bodyguard, and I dont' know why but I feel like that would make a really interesting story. AND THEN SIMON HAS TO GO UNDECOVER AS A COMPANION YES OKAY THIS STORY NEEDS TO HAPPEN. :D
River and Kaylee's bedroom! D'awww! And oh my god, Simon with Mal and Jayne with Inara would cause the MOST EXPLOSIONS EVER. Also, for some reason "Jayne's Room" and "Mal's Hall" make me laugh.
The Social Network time!
Mark/Eduardo OW OW ALL OF MY FEELINGS FOREVER ;_____________;. And Chris/Dustin...oh my god, I have seen so many fics where that's how Chris sees their relationship, because Dustin is all LALALA :DDD because he's Dustin, but then there's a happy ending because this is fanfiction. <3
Chris Hughes is Better Than You. He has important business to do and can't be bothered by your silly antics. ALSO EDUARDO'S FIRST AID STATION GOD THAT SHOULD NOT HURT AS MUCH AS IT DOES
Almost done! Just three floorplans left.
SCOTT PILGRIM:
STEPHEN/JOSEPH. WALLACE/SCOTT. I LOVE THIS GENERATOR. But Ramona/Knives ahaha BAD IDEA. For some reason Joseph's Excuse Training Room seems extremely in-character, even if I have no idea what it means. And Knives's dining room...*rimshot*.
HAVEMERCY AIRMEN:
All of the roommate combinations here are SUCH BAD IDEAS. Luvander's Exhibition Room is...about as porn-y sounding as this ENTIRE FANDOM, so I approve. <3 Thom gets his own kitchen, which is really cute. And of course the majority of the house is taken up by Rook's Balcony, because OUR BALCONY SCENE BEATS UP YOUR BALCONY SCENE. :D
AAAND FINALLY...TWEENDOM:
I literally just picked the first twenty names that came to mind. For some reason, Ariana and Gregg sharing a room strikes me as REALLY CUTE - she'd talk at him about Harry Potter and they'd talk about their completely sexy significant others and it would be the best ever. And then they'd hang out in Gregg's Great Hall because oh Gregg, honey, you are the most British. Liz's Clubroom is the SEXIEST PLACE IN THE HOUSE. Devon's Counterfeit Note Make Room is...completely unsurprising. Kendall and Dillon share a room and Dillon is a dirty hipster in training and it is the best. Drake has a Hangar, because, well, why wouldn't he? Aaand Logan has a Chlamidia Clinic because SOMEBODY needs to keep this house under control. And of course Miranda has an Information Desk. That's why it's so big. It's full of SECRETS. XD
OKAY OKAY I'M DONE
YOU CAN GO BACK TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED DAYS